dor Page 46 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
What Happens To Enforcers When Hockey Uses Them Up?
More winter Friday nights than not through my first few years of high school, I was in my usual seat at the local arena, three or four rows up behind the home team's bench. On the ice, the Ontario Hockey League's Ottawa 67's, a group of—boys, really, aged 16 to 20. A handful of them would go on to...
Can A Keeper Get A Red Card While Unconscious? One Player Investigates
If you add it up, Máximo Banguera of Barcelona SC spends nearly two minutes pretending to be dead to the world in between a late tackle on an Atlético Nacional player and when the ref finally shows him the red card he was obviously trying to avoid....
What To Do When Your Cutting Board Reeks Of Onion
Jolie Kerr is a cleaning expert and advice columnist. She'll be here every week helping to answer your filthiest questions. Are you dirty? Check the Squalor Archive for assistance. Are you still dirty? Email her....
Racing Club's Ingenious Goal Is Why We Need More Free Kick Shenanigans
Seriously, why isn't there more experimentation on free kicks? As Racing Club proved in the Copa Libertadores last night, there are trickier, probably more effective ways to score from a dead ball than just thumping it vaguely towards goal. We have enough evidence. Let's put it to use....
Happy Borussia Dortmund Celebrate Goal Batman And Robin Style
Borussia Dortmund players are happy again! Today's 3-0 victory over Schalke was their fourth straight in the Bundesliga, dragging themselves from the relegation zone to ninth in the table. Since they're finally confident that they'll actually score some goals, they're planning out elaborate costum...
Vanderbilt Coach Apologizes For Cursing Out His Player
Vanderbilt coach Kevin Stallings issued multiple apologies after he was caught on camera berating one of his players, yelling, among other things, "I'm going to fucking kill you."...
Lotsa Rougneds
It's true! The elder is Rougned Roberto Odor; the newest Ranger is Rougned Jose Odor. ...
Goodbye To Old-Ass Jason Giambi, Who Refused To Go Down A Villain
Jason Giambi is retiring. At age 44, the slugger announced yesterday that his gradual disappearance from the game—one that began all the way back in 2009, when Giambi remade himself into a grizzled pinch-hitter and nominal player-coach—has reached its terminus. His career probably should have ende...
Tony Dorsett On CTE: I Didn't Know "The End Was Going To Be Like This"
In 2013, NFL hall of famer Tony Dorsett was among the first few living football players to be diagnosed with signs of the chronic traumatic encephalopathy, a neurodegenerative disease that manifests as dementia and depression. It's gotten worse—by definition, it'll get worse until he dies—and in a r...
Borussia Dortmund Fans Are Fed Up
Borussia Dortmund's fans have finally reached their breaking point. Just 21 months ago they were watching their team barely lose in the Champions League Finals, and they haven't seen them finish worse than second in the Bundesliga since the 2009-10 season. This season Dortmund aren't merely strugg...
Help! My Apartment Reeks Of Drunken-Cooking-Incident Smoke!
Jolie Kerr is a cleaning expert and advice columnist. She'll be here every week helping to answer your filthiest questions. Are you dirty? Check the Squalor Archive for assistance. Are you still dirty? Email her....
Who Would Win If A Hippo Fought A Rhino? A Question For The Ages.
This morning, in the Deadspin staff chatroom, we found ourselves debating whether a hippopotamus or a rhinoceros would win in a head-to-head battle. Since the question wasn't settled there [even after, like, six hours—ed], Albert Burneko and Greg Howard have decided to air the question in a public ...
Two Former Vanderbilt Football Players Found Guilty Of Rape
After just three hours of deliberation, a jury found former Vanderbilt football players Cory Batey and Brandon Vandenburg, who were accused of raping a woman on the Vanderbilt campus in 2013, guilty on all charges. Both Batey and Vandenburg were found guilty of multiple counts of aggravated rape and...
At Least Cleveland Still Has Great Beer
The mayor of Boston went on CNN this morning to talk about a snowstorm that hadn't begun yet. That is insane. I realize part of my reaction is based on being old enough to remember when CNN trafficked in weightier matters than weather porn and celebrity gossip, and I also concede that the storm head...
Poker-Playing Dog, Or Bud Selig?
This fine portrait now hangs in the Padres' offices at Petco Park. Some people say it looks like soon-to-be-former MLB commissioner Bud Selig, but I think it kinda looks like one of those poker-playing dogs. What do you think?...
Jozy Altidore, The Striker Who Never Was, Is Coming Back Home
Yesterday, news broke that perennial Premier League bottom feeders Sunderland had reached a swap deal with Major League Soccer. American striker Jozy Altidore is leaving Sunderland for MLS's Toronto FC. English striker Jermain Defoe, who just joined Toronto FC from Tottenham last summer, is going to...
Cristiano Ronaldo, A Decent Soccer Player, Wins FIFA Player Of The Year
Today, Real Madrid's Cristiano Ronaldo was awarded the 2014 FIFA Ballon d'Or. It's the second year in a row he's been named FIFA's best player, and the third time in his career. The Portuguese winger beat out Argentina's Lionel Messi, German keeper Manuel Neuer, and a bunch of other guys who had no ...
Player Gets Red Card For Hacking Down His Own Brother
I mean, I get it. Sometimes, brothers suck. Sometimes, shit gets heated. Sometimes, there's nothing to do but take a running start, slide two feet through the back of their legs, and deal with Ma Dukes later....
Marco Reus Fined $670,000 For Driving Without A License
German paper Bild reports (paywall) that Borussia Dortmund star Marco Reus has been fined €540,000 after police discovered he had been driving without a license for the past three years. Apparently Reus received five speeding tickets during that time, but somehow police never figured out that he a...