dor Page 69 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

NIU Football Player Faces Assault Charges For Bulldozing A Band Member
Northern Illinois linebacker Jamaal Bass (No. 6 in the video, No. 1 in our hearts) was suspended for two games after an incident in November, when he ran over a poor Toledo band member. The trouble's not over: an Ohio grand jury has indicted Bass on one count of felonious assault and one count of ...

Before He Became Kareem, Lew Had Trouble Finding Pants That Fit
As a sophomore at UCLA in 1967, young Lew Alcindor already had one of the highest verticals in the game, and an inseam to match. (Fifty-one inches, to be precise.) Tailored clothes were the solution to that, but the rest of college basketball had no answer for Alcindor's and UCLA's dominance. The ne...

Florida State, Vanderbilt, And Michigan State Are Going Dancing, But They Would Have Been Anyway
This brings to a close our series highlighting teams celebrating their conference championships, and like most televised entertainment, it comes to a somewhat anticlimactic end. Sure, FSU won the ACC for the first time ever, and Vanderbilt won the SEC tournament for the first time since 1951 (thou...

David Ortiz, You Are NOT The Father
"According to a report in the Dominican newspaper Hoy by veteran baseball reporter Dionisio Soldevila, a DNA test showed that David Ortiz was not the father of a 17-year-old in the Dominican Republic. Ortiz was the subject of a paternity claim by a woman whom Ortiz said he had never met." [Boston He...

Neymar Basically Dribbled A Ball Into The Goal From 70 Yards Yesterday
Santos star and Brazilian international Neymar has been linked time and again, often prematurely, to transfers to big European clubs. But Neymar is still in Brazil, perhaps because he can do things there like dribble the entire length of the field without someone giving him a tumble, which is what...

Science! Proves Ron Artest's Halftime Drinking Hurt His Free-Throw Shooting
Our old friends at the Harvard Sports Analytics Collective took a long-overdue look at whether Ron Artest's early-career practice of drinking Hennessy cognac at halftime hurt his play. "Sure enough during the 2001 and 2002 seasons his free-throw percentage during the third quarter was 67.21% compare...

Street Fighting Gal Has The Courtesy To Remove Her Ring, And The Power To Fell Her Foe
Here we have Kristin and Dee, doing battle after a substantial build up, Outsiders-esque in a greasers and socs descend on the playground sense. The ladies work out some ground rules. The fans point droves of cameraphones in their direction....

Nicki Minaj Had A Bit Of A Wardrobe Malfunction In The NBA All-Star Pregame
Fresh off her aiding and abetting of M.I.A.'s Super Bowl impropriety and a batshit insane Grammy Awards performance Nicki Minaj got a bit too worked up during the announcement of tonight's All-Star Game lineups, it would seem, and had a falling-out with her undergarment....

Bobby Valentine Kicks Off The Boston Teetotaler Party
Bobby Valentine has outlawed alcohol in the Boston Red Sox clubhouse. He has also banned alcohol on flights that come at the end of a road trip. Although Valentine did not discuss the rule with the team prior to enacting it, David Ortiz is on board and provided a much-needed voice of reason....

The Small Child/Hockey Enforcer Fight Dynamic Has Spread From NHL To Skate Park
What we have here is not all that dissimilar to the great Derek "Blue Jacket" Dorsett vs. John "Blackhawk" Scott Ice Brawl of Feb. 18, that being small guy tempting his fisticuffs fate with big guy....

David Haye Showed Up At Dereck Chisora's Post-Fight Presser, Tried To Beat Him With A Tripod
The circus that surrounded British heavyweight Dereck Chisora during his unsuccessful attempt to take the WBC title from Vitali Klitschko continued after the fight, when fellow Brit David Haye arrived to, apparently, start some shit....

Small Child Attempts To Fight Professional Hockey Player
The Chicago Blackhawks were in the middle of skating out the final 15 minutes of a 6-1 thumping of the Columbus Blue Jackets when one of the most absurd-looking fights ever broke out. You may have thought it was a child playfully climbing on an adult, but it was actually two professional hockey pl...

We Are All Witnesses To A Magisterial Slap-To-The-Head Flop
This is from London. There, it seems, suited security guards have more leeway to engage in full-on Rick James-esque slaps to others's earholes. Said guard immediately seems to have a tinge of regret to his actions, though....

Kentucky-Vanderbilt Featured Your Standard Kid Flipping The Bird Next To A Guy In A Fuzzy Winter Hat With A Trench Coat Shirt And Mirrored Glasses
Your morning roundup for Feb. 12, the day we occupied Palin. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors. ...

Digger Phelps Is Tired Of Kentucky Fans' Bullshit; Kentucky Fans Tell Him To Go To Hell
Kentucky basketball fans have invaded Nashville in an attempt to overwhelm Vanderbilt fans ahead of today's matchup between the Wildcats and Commodores, one which ESPN chose as its College GameDay site of the week. (They're not-so-cleverly calling it "Occupy Memorial.")...

"They're Just Waiting Until We Die": Former NFL Players Suing The League Describe Its Indifference Toward Injuries
On a coffee table at his suburban Dallas home, Tony Dorsett recently laid out two pages of color-coded images for a reporter from the Associated Press, saying they show how his brain is slowly dying. The images were brain scans, and Dorsett said doctors told him the red parts indicate his brain's l...

If This Drunk Canadian Just Kept His Mouth Shut, His Hat Wouldn't Have Gotten Pissed On
Oh, this poor, poor Canadian chappie. He's 34. He calls out a kid with a Mohawk because "we used to shave our heads." Then, he confronts brochacho wearing sunglasses at night in homage to Corey Hart, more likely than not. He then pulls the surrogate-father line of meddlin'....

Please Get J.R. Smith Out Of China Before His Family Starts World War III
The last time we checked in with J.R. Smith, he was breaking ankles while his sister Stephanie was starting brawls....

Goalies Fight In Minor League Hockey Brawl, Announcers Herald "Mass Hysteria"
Half the fun of this brawl between the Bakersfield Condors and the Ontario Reign last night is, obviously, the brawl itself—which included the goalies. The other half is the announcers' slow descent into giddy madness, including tossing out quotes from Ghostbusters. One of the goalies shamefully k...

The State Of The Union Is Punchy In Front Yards, Trailer Parks And Beyond (NSFW)
Per YouTube uploader kustomcougar, "Cocky neighbor gets his big mouth shut after constant harassment. Then he throws a rock at my brothers truck."...