dre Page 158 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Soccer Player Badmouths Ref, Gets Told Right The Fuck Off
"Oh, what's that? You have something to say? Where are you going?!! I THOUGHT YOU HAD SOMETHING TO SAY!" ...
MASL Player Headbutts Opponent After Playoff Match; Team Cuts Him
The Baltimore Blast beat the Missouri Comets 10-7 in Sunday's particularly tense MASL playoff match, but after the Blast's 2-0 series sweep, Comets defender Andre Braithwaite walked up to Blast defender Pat Healey and headbutted him in the face....
Andrew Hammond Wins Again, Raises Hamburger In Triumph
Andrew Hammond's story is the best in the NHL right now, and the Senators are pushing for a miracle. But I can't shake the sense that the headline here ought to be "Magic hamburger doesn't explode after being thrown onto the ice." ...
Now There's A Ranch-Dressing Restaurant, So Let's Walk Into The Ocean
Listen. I say the following with a pristine record of support for unhealthful dairy-based coating glops—both as a genre of foodstuffs and in most specific instances—as well as with the firm backing of all available science: Ranch dressing is bad. Bad dressing....
What The Hell Are The Saints Doing?
Chip Kelly's busy gutting the Eagles roster and reshaping it to his liking, but let's turn to the Saints, who are just throwing shit all over the office this week....
Asshole Spectator Grabs Cyclist's Handlebars, Causes Broken Collarbone
Australian cyclist Loren Rowney was in full sprint, gunning for first place at the Molecaten Drentse 8—a race in the Netherlands—when some asshole reached his hand out (seemingly on purpose) and grabbed her handlebars, causing her to spill to the pavement. Instead of possibly winning the race, or ...
The Colts Are Going For It
Indianapolis agreed to terms with Andre Johnson yesterday, adding the WR to a sizable and significant free-agency haul that figures to upgrade the Colts at multiple positions on both sides of the ball. Every year or two, one team decides that its window is as open as it's ever going to be, and makes...
Cortland Finnegan Retires, Remains In Denial About Time He Got Beat Up
Cortland Finnegan—the long-time Titan cornerback who is better known as the NFL's biggest asshole—took to Instagram today to announce his retirement. In a statement that covers his love of the game, his appreciation at having played, and his excitement about his future, he reveals that is apparent...
Winnipeg Found A New, Crotchpunchingly Painful Way To Lose
If you are a Winnipeg fan, you are used to things not going your way. So please don't be surprised when the Jets miss out on the postseason by a point or two, and this game-losing goal from the neutral zone with a minute left amounts to the difference....
Damn, Even We Have To Admit That This Seattle Sounders Goal Is A Beauty
You know how we feel about MLS, but still, even we can't front on a team goal of this quality. This is a textbook three man weave the likes of which you'd be happy to pull off in training, let alone a match. Pure class. Bravo, Sounders....
Maurice Jones-Drew Is Retiring
Running back Maurice Jones-Drew just announced his retirement from the NFL, which is oddly affecting, because he was tiny and strong and great and so much fun to watch....
Chris Paul Loses His Mind When DeAndre Jordan Forgets To Shoot
In Wednesday night's tie game against the Trail Blazers with 2.8 seconds left, the Clippers ran a play for Chris Paul to take the final shot. The point guard got a good look, but missed. DeAndre Jordan grabbed the rebound, heard the shot clock sound, and didn't try a shot because he thought it was...
Andre Johnson Is Done With The Texans
Andre Johnson was drafted by the Houston Texans before the team's second season of existence, and he's spent the last 12 years becoming the face of the franchise. Johnson caught over 1,000 balls and racked up 13,597 yards while suiting up as the primary wideout for a number of mediocre Texans team...
Why Your Children’s Video Game Sucks: <i>Minecraft </i>
The Game: Minecraft...
How To Tell If You're Being A Crank On The Internet, And How To Stop
Man, you sure are het up! Agitated. Can you believe these goddamn coddled athletes/P.C. Police/Now Finaglin' Cheatriots/Twitter-celebrated pop stars of possibly dubious talent/people talking about the colors on a dress when we haven't even solved all The Problems yet? I mean, cheese and rice! ...
What Are We Being Ordered To Care About Instead Of That Goddamn Dress?
The Rule of the Internet is that when people argue about something silly, like the color of a goddamn dress, an army of remarkably irritating people will amass to counter that phenomenon and remind you that you are a shallow cock for worrying about the color of a dress. Let's meet these smarm merch...
Andrew Wiggins Shows James Harden What Real Defense Looks Like
James Harden must have been feeling pretty cocky after turning Ricky Rubio's ankles into cornmeal, because he tried to pull the same shit on Andrew Wiggins just a few minutes later. Unfortunately for Harden, Wiggins looked at all those fancy crossovers and said, "Hi, um, I'm not Ricky Rubio."...
D-Leaguer Sinks Two Half-Court Shots In One Game
Andre Stringer of the Maine Red Claws is your D-League player of the week—probably, who's going to check—after hitting two buzzer-beating half-court shots in one game on Sunday against the Erie BayHawks. Stringer hit his buckets at halftime and the end of the third quarter. ...