drugs Page 24 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

A Year Ago, Diamondbacks 3B Sean Burroughs Was Drinking 8 Slurpees Daily, Eating Cheeseburgers Out Of A Trash Can
Sean Burroughs, if you'll recall, was once the fraught golden boy of early 2000s NL baseball—the smooth-swinging Padres third baseman who could only hit singles. (His career isolated slugging percentage, .078, is only a fuzz better than Juan Pierre's.) But Burroughs has since resuscitated his pro ca...

A Naked Tasing And Too Much Pot In The Pot Brownies: Tales Of The Thomas Brothers
A quick timeline of the past year for the Thomas brothers, both linemen from Montana, that should illustrate why you want to party with them:...

US Soccer's Gold Cup Chances Improve After Five Mexican Players Test Positive For PEDs
Decio de María Serrano, the secretary general of Mexican soccer, announced today that five players on the Mexican national soccer team currently poised to dominate the Gold Cup tested positive for a substance called Clenbuterol, which is the same drug that Alberto Contador tested positive for at las...

Lance Armstrong Wants TV Show To Say It's Sorry
"In a letter sent Wednesday to CBS News chairman and '60 Minutes' executive producer Jeff Fager, lawyer Elliot Peters said the May 22 segment about Armstrong was built on a series of falsehoods, and he accused the reputable CBS show of sloppy journalism." [ESPN, PDF of letter here]...

<em>The New York Times</em> Provides The First Drug Smear Of The Baseball Season
"For the last few years," The New York Times writes in the Bartolo Colon story that we flagged earlier today, "baseball and other sports, while fighting to limit the use of performance-enhancing drugs, have been faced with a new and murky challenge: players getting sophisticated blood treatments, of...

This Promo For A 1989 Josh Brolin Movie Makes A Convincing Case Against Steroids, Short Shorts
In 1989, the Brolin men co-starred in a made-for-TV movie called Finish Line. We'd never heard of this film until a tipster sent along a link to the promo last week. It's worth watching the clip in its entirety, because as far as we can tell, it doesn't miss a single important moment from the movi...

The Stupid Barry Bonds Prosecution, In A Stupid Nutshell
As you all know, Barry Bonds was convicted yesterday on a single count of rambling in the first degree. (No, seriously. Seven years of this shit, and that's what they got him on — evading a question he ultimately answered. Aggravated incoherence. A felony charge of Not Being Freaking Pericles in the...

Barry Bonds Guilty On One Count Of Obstruction; America Now Safe From The Scourge Of PEDs
After four days of deliberations, the jury in the Barry Bonds case has found the all-time home run leader guilty on one count of obstruction; the defense and the prosecution settled on a mistrial for the remaining three counts of lying to a grand jury. We would like to point out that he is still a p...

This Woman Crashed A Car With 54 Bags Of Heroin In Her Vagina
Karin Mackaliunas of Scranton, Pennsylvania could be a character on The Office — if they had a character who stuffs 54 bags of heroin, cash, empty bags, and pills in her vagina and then crashes a car. Bloated much?… [Jalopnik] ...

This Man Hid A Crack Rock In His Crack
Marcel Foster was busted for speeding in Spartanburg, South Carolina. During the traffic stop police found two bags of a "leafy green" substance in the car and "a large white crack rock inside a clear bag between Foster's buttocks." [Jalopnik]...

The Real Dicky Eklund In HBO's <em>High On Crack Street</em> And Places Less Dignified
The sad tale of boxer Dicky Eklund has been well-chronicled on screens both big and small. One of the more interesting plot devices in the recent Hollywood film The Fighter is that the HBO documentary High on Crack Street shapes part of the movie's storyline. The video above includes some choice s...

The Case Against "The Case Against Lance Armstrong"
Maybe you've heard about Sports Illustrated's exciting new Lance Armstrong feature. At bottom, it's a story about a corrupt man who gets away with cheating because the people who'd ordinarily police it have decided to look the other way....

The Novitzky Scalps
Barry Bonds: Charged with four counts of perjury and one count of obstruction of justice for telling a federal grand jury he never knowingly used steroids. The substance he's accused of taking, The Clear, was neither illegal nor specifically banned by baseball at the time of his testimony. Trial is ...

Are You Now Or Have You Ever Been An Idiot?
The argument here — that we're justified in suspecting Jeff Bagwell of using steroids because he "never uttered a word" or "demand[ed] accountability" about PEDs in baseball — is straight-up HUACtastic bullshit, no chaser....

Batshit Hall Of Fame Voter: "I Compare PED Users To Murderers"
And we compare Lowell Cohn to a cymbal-banging monkey toy. I'm beginning to suspect HOF voters really do fancy themselves an elite task force of karacter kops. Drugs make people crazy. A Hall of Fame ballot makes people crazier. [PressDemocrat.com, Business Insider]...

IOC Keeps Stuffing Its Head Up Its Ass With Doping Policy
When athletes blame failed drug tests on protein supplements, I usually call bullshit. But in this story, U.S. swimmer Jessica Hardy missed the '08 Olympics because of a nutritional supplement, and now, she may also miss the London Games. This is bullshit!...

"Celtic" Delonte West Gets Into A Locker-Room Fight With Von "Who?" Wafer
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Dallas TV Guy Can't Stop Talking About All The Stoners At The World Series
Gawker brought Newy Scruggs—intrepid NBC Dallas sports reporter and Joe Friday-style misuser of drug lingo—to our attention yesterday. He continues to be highly amusing. Here are his best weed moments so far. Enjoy. H/T Mickey....

San Franciscans Continue To Smoke Weed Unabashedly In Front Of Texas Reporters
Through two games, this is easily the most interesting aspect of the World Series. H/T Kyle....

Get Over Yourself, Narc
Here's New York Times drug-sniffing dog Michael S. Schmidt, licking his own crotch over his Jose Guillen-HGH story: "With a lineup filled with castoffs, they have become a remarkable October story, but the Guillen disclosure may put at least a small dent in the positive attention they have generated...