ea Page 1412 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Hero Cat "Throws" Out First Pitch
Tara the tabby, who saved her human from an attacking dog, threw out the first pitch at last night's Bakersfield Blaze game. As you might expect, since cats care nothing for pageantry and have useless muppet paws instead of hands, it was one of the worst first pitches in recorded history. #SticktoHe...

Paul George Says He Blacked Out After Taking A Knee To The Head
NBA fans saw something they aren't really used to seeing during last night's game between the Heat and Pacers: a player lying motionless on the floor after taking a blow to the head....

Deadspin Up All Night: Industry Rule #4080
Thank you for your continued support of Deadspin. Queensbridge. ...

How One Gay Athlete's Coming Out Led To An Activists' War
Derrick Gordon wanted to come out on his terms, and that meant controlling the timing. The UMass guard had told his parents, then his coach, then his teammates. Seven days later, he would tell the world, but for the moment he had one request. "Derrick had a long conversation with his teammates about...

An Alarm Clock Evolved, Upgrades For Your Old Car, $15 Label Maker
If you're still using a regular alarm clock, like some kind of animal, here's a deal that might interest you. The tried-and-true HF3500 wake-up light can be yours for $60 after clipping the $10 coupon, or the step-up HF3510, featuring more wake-up sounds, is only $85 after a $15 coupon. ...

The Trashiest Tattoo Locations, Ranked
Before we get to the Funbag, a couple of things. First off, to commemorate the paperback release ofSomeone Could Get Hurt, I'm gonna do a reading at the Dodge City bar here in D.C. on Wednesday night. We'll start around 8:30 p.m, and I promise not to read for too long, because no one ever likes th...

Yaya Touré Wants To Go Home Because Nobody Made Him A Birthday Cake
Apparently, Manchester City superstar and greatest midfielder currently doing it Yaya Touré is unhappy with his club. Why, you might wonder, when they just won the Premier League in exciting fashion, featuring him as their best player? Because the team didn't celebrate his birthday....

Goaltending Is Not The Canadiens' Problem
The difference between an elite goaltender and an outright bad one really isn't that huge. The best goalie in the league is probably going to give you .925, maybe .930 over the course of a season. The worst regular starter is probably going to sit around .900 or .905. That's two or three extra saves...

Connor Barwin Says Nick Foles Has The Biggest Dong On The Eagles
Hey, have you ever found yourself sitting around and wondering things like, "Which player on the Philadelphia Eagles has the biggest unit?" Well, thanks to Eagles linebacker Connor Barwin, it looks like we have an answer to that question....

$60 Million High School Football Stadium Deemed Unsafe
Two years ago, the football-mad suburb of Allen, Texas, sank $60 million into a state-of-the-art, 18,000-seat high school football stadium. Now, according to the Dallas Morning News, the stadium will be closed for the upcoming season because it has been deemed structurally unsafe. ...

Man United Hire New Manager, Already Expect To Win Premier League
It's not even next season yet and we've already got the first lolunited post of the '14-'15 campaign. New Manchester United ship captain Louis van Gaal has officially been christened, and in lieu of smacking him across the head with a champagne bottle, they've promised him £150M, with an expectation...

Foul Ball-Seeking Angels Fan Absolutely Wrecks Old Woman
The most painful part of this video? The poor old woman crying out, "My shoulder!"...

Pantomime Cunnilingus And Blowjob: Braves Fan Covers All The Bases
So, here is a dude on the SportsSouth Braves feed doing the ol' blowjob and cunnilingus routine behind home plate. There's not a whole lot to praise here, but we do appreciate his open-mindedness and willingness to please when it comes to pantomiming oral sex....

Former Tampa Bay Bucs Cheerleader Sues Team For Wage Theft
Former Buccaneers cheerleader Manouchcar Pierre-Val has just made Tampa Bay the fifth NFL team to get served with a lawsuit from its cheerleaders. ...

Giant Sinkhole Opens At Austin Peay's Football Stadium
Austin Peay's Governors Stadium is getting a facelift, but a 40-foot-deep sinkhole in the north endzone has made the process a little more difficult. Workers have been aware of the sinkhole for some time, but in trying to make the area safe and workable, they've had to dig out a considerably larger ...

Deadspin Up All Night: We Getting It Done
Thank you for your continued support of Deadspin. Basketball!...

College Freshman Runs Wind-Aided 9.77-Second 100 Meters
Baylor freshman Trayvon Bromell crushed the competition this weekend at the Big 12 track & field championships, turning in a ridiculous 9.77 in the 100 meters—albeit with a wind reading that rendered the time ineligible for any records....

Your Open Relationship Is Horseshit
There was a dude on Reddit today who proposed an open relationship with his girlfriend, only to have the whole thing blow up in his face when his girlfriend managed to score vestigial lovers and he couldn't do likewise. Any normal person will tell you that, unless your name is Gene Simmons, open re...

Angry Preakness Bro Is A True Renaissance Bro
Bros puffing out their chests and acting tough in the Preakness infield is a thing that probably happens every year, but I doubt that any of them have put on a performance as wonderful as this one. This bro right here is special, because he can kill with his fists as well as his mind....

The Time Tim Donaghy Punched Out Joey Crawford
The Oregonian's John Canzano published the last of his five-part series on the state of NBA officiating last week, and he saved one of his juiciest anecdotes for last. ...