eli Page 163 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Celtics Use Rhythm Method, Belichick Craftiness To Beat Pistons
The NBA Closer is written by Matt McHale, who's still wondering why the Celtics were all up in LeBron's junk last series. When he's not focusing on the sordid past, he can be found mocking the laughable present at Basketbawful. Enjoy!...
Ah, The Cultural Rewards Of Major League Baseball
The life of a Japanese player, when assimilated into a Major League Baseball clubhouse, can be difficult. You have to learn parts of other languages, deal with cultural differences you hadn't anticipated and, mostly, deal with the odd duck that is Jonathan Papelbon....
The Happiest Place On Earth, After Mom's Favorite Antique Store
For the last post before Mother's Day, it would only be appropriate to feature the professional athlete who's the closest to his mother. That would be Super Bowl MVP Buster Bluth Eli Manning, who finally took his requisite parade float down Main Street of Disneyland on Wednesday after missing it in ...
Ex-Associate Claims In Book That O.J. Confessed To Murder While High
The Associated Press (via SportsbyBrooks) got the advance scoop on a book to be released Monday by Mike Gilbert, a memorabilia dealer who profited off O.J. Simpson for years, claiming Simpson admitted to killing his ex-wife, Nicole Brown Simpson, after he was acquitted for her murder....
Reports Of Limatime's Demise Greatly Exaggerated
A few weeks ago, it seemed, the world was faced with the sad prospect of bidding farewell to Limatime when reports surfaced out of Korea that he had been released by the Kia Tigers. Mope no longer, lovers of exuberant pitchers with stacked wives, for not only is Limatime born anew with the Tigers, ...
Today In NSFW Theater: The Lee Elia Rant Is 25 Years Old
Today is the 25th anniversary of Lee Elia's infamous tirade against Cubs fans (language in video uncensored, NSFW). Is it the most notable tirade in sports history? Oklahoma State football coach Mike Gundy's "I'm a man! I'm 40!" rant gets more play, but has not yet stood the test of time. In the NF...
Reviewing The NFL Draft, As If Anybody Knows Anything
Some "experts" — you know, the people who decide who did a great job in a draft mere hours after it was completed and before, uh, anyone so much as puts on more than a hat — were up on the New England Patriots' selections at the NFL Draft this weekend. We couldn't tell you, but we did love any and a...
A Kiper-McShay Draft Day Hair Trade
The shocking Mel Kiper-Todd McShay follicle swap [The Sports Hernia]...
1st Round, Second Overall: Rams Take Chris Long
Did you know that Chris Long is Howie Long's son? No kidding! The media really has been doing a swell job keeping that tidbit under wraps. Yes, Long is the scion of the Hall of Fame lineman and impeccably-coiffed FOX analysis android. Howie Long was so spectacular in his playing days that a pass ru...
Dolphins Take Jake Long First Overall
Greetings, fellow podium gazers! It's great to be spending Saturday afternoon with you and not my family. And what better way to kick things off but with some four day old news! When we last saw Bill Parcells, he was sitting in the owner's box watching the Dolphins' final game, looking like a late...
This Week's Tasered Athlete: Tim Worley
Wait, you don't remember him? Me neither, so let's revisit his career. Tim Worley was a great running back for the University of Georgia (an All-American, at that) and the seventh overall draft pick by the Pittsburgh Steelers in 1989. He didn't have much of a pro career, lasting only four seasons, r...
A Sad Good Night For Jose Lima
We feel like we write this every few months, but this time it looks like it's for real. Yes, the Jose Lima Era in baseball appears to have actually ended....
Celine Dion Will Heal Olympic Rifts With Powerful Vocals
Celine Dion is about ready to choke a bitch if this Olympic boycott talk persists. Dion called on all people to "keep the dream possible for our young kids." She came to Beijing to express support for the Games after her concert in Shanghai on Friday....
South Park, Cheating, And You
“In America, it’s OK to cheat as long as you cheat your way to the top.” What does Stand and Deliver have in common with Bill Belichick? South Park explains....
Eli Manning's Reach-Around Courtesy Is Impressive
Yeah, that episode may not get by network censors....
Obviously, Tom Gordon Didn't Get His Balls Blessed
Yesterday morning, right in front of the Mike Schmidt statue at Citizens Bank Park, the Philadelphia Phillies had their balls blessed by a priest, a rabbi and a pastor with the hopes of giving 2007's team to beat an extra boost of godliness to kick off 2008. Well, God was napping yesterday, as the P...
ESPN's Featured Comment Of The Day
ESPN scoured its message boards this morning to find its cleverest, boldest, most enlightening comment, and chose this one above all others ......
About Last Night
What you missed while blessing the Phillies' balls ... • MLB: Santana, Mets begin quest for world domination by annexing Florida Marlins, 7-2. • College women's basketball: No soup for North Carolina; LSU reaches Final Four. • College men's basketball: Stanford to lose more than 14 feet of Lopez bro...
Just Another Last Sunday Of The Tourney
Storming The Floor wraps up yesterday's Elite Eight action in a more detailed way than we will....
Your Davidson-Kansas Live Blog
And now the Davidson Wildcats are all that stands in the way of an all 1-seed Final Four. If they, and we've been assured all day they are not just Stephen Curry, can deal Bill Self another regional final loss, they will be the first 10 seed to make the Final Four....