england Page 92 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
The Patriots Might Just Be Toying With Us Now
A while back, we said that this whole "call a timeout right before a big play" business would end when someone called a timeout that nullified a great, game-winning play by his own team. That's exactly what happened tonight, thanks to an overeager timeout from Baltimore defensive coordinator Rex Ry...
Another Night That The Patriots Run The NFL
Sometimes it seems like the only major drama left in the NFL swirls around Bill Belichick and the New England Patriots. We're almost as fascinated with the Dolphins' losing streak as we are with the Patriots' winning one, but tonight, "Monday Night Football" will reap the national benefits....
Ashley Young Wants You To Know His Body As Well As He Does
You see, now, this is what American sports desperately needs more of: Athletic superstars who masturbate on their Web cams. And you thought Curt Schilling's blog had poor spelling!...
The Patriots Need A Theme Song
Determined to ruin a good thing, the Boston Globe somehow decided that the Patriots need a theme song. The easy way to do this would be to search through Tom Brady's iTunes folder until something clicks (Huey Lewis and the News!), but no, the Globe is putting it up to a vote. Poems, slogans and Chri...
The Patriots Aren't The Same Without Troy Brown
Today, we thank Bill Belichick for adding the one ingredient this otherwise-inspirational Patriots team has been missing: Troy Brown is back!...
The Patriots Could Lose! There's Hope!
So, in the wake of the Patriots' near-loss last night, what have we learned, kids? Does this mean the supposedly inevitable undefeated season is in jeopardy? Does it mean the Patriots are about to get angry and start winning games by 70?...
The Patriots Are, For One Night, Almost Mortal
The Eagles might have fallen just short tonight, but three important things happened....
Eagles, Patriots, Roughriders And Bombers
The biggest question regarding tonight's Eagles and Patriots game (8:15pm, NBC) isn't whether the Pats can keep their perfect season run alive. They will. It's whether or not this inevitable gong show will resemble anything even close to a competitive football game. It probably won't....
Tony Henry, Croatian Soccer Hero
Interpreting this post's title, one might assume that Tony Henry, pictured, scored the game-winning goal in Croatia's crucial Euro 2008 defeat of England. Nope. Tony Henry doesn't even play soccer. He's a British opera singer. And thanks to a small gaffe, a new Croatian hero....
The Eagles Are HUGE Underdogs Sunday
We were pretty amazed to read this this morning: Apparently Sunday night's Patriots-Eagles game has the biggest spread in NFL history. (Well, not exactly: They're not counting expansion teams, for some reason; the Buccaneers were 24-point underdogs to the Steelers in their first season, and lost 42-...
Andrea Kremer Hearts Tom Brady
It's a few days old now, but, OK, judging from this "interview" from Sunday, it's only a matter of time before Andrea Kremer, Gisele and Tom are all on the Dr. Phil show hashing this out. Such shameless flirting has not been witnessed since Churchill got Roosevelt to agree to the lend-lease program...
Bill Belichick Is A Surly Dick
Michael Showalter is one of the minds behind The State and Stella and the writer and star of the films Wet Hot American Summer and The Baxter. We're a fan. He also, apparently, is a sports fan. To promote his new album Sandwiches And Cats, he's doing a pseudo tour of the various lousy blogs like our...
We Suspect The Pats Have Videotape Of The Incident
How do you know the Patriots are having a breakthrough, historic, crossover season? It's not just that they're undefeated; they now have their own crazy stalker lady....
Don Shula Will Assign You An Asterisk And You Will Wear It
We knew there was something missing from the NFL season: An asterisk controversy. Of course. Well let's get right to it. Don Shula — who coached the 1972 Miami Dolphins to the only unbeaten season in NFL history — says that the Patriots should get an asterisk if they finish 19-0 this season....
Patriots Fail to Cover Spread, Claim Hollow Victory
• Was there ever any doubt? You could tell that it was just a matter of time before Tom Brady and Randy Moss could stick a dagger through the Indianapolis defense. For three quarters Tony Dungy's Colts controlled the field, but you can't keep a good man down long, and the same can be said of Bill Be...
New England Patriots Are The Saviors Of Alefgard
And there it is. The New England Patriots collected the Stones of Sunlight, the Staff of Rain, and the Token of Erdrick. Tom Brady will promptly whisk Princess Gwaelin away to a bed and breakfast somewhere south of Cantlin. Meanwhile, Bill Belichick will now reproduce a set of Erdrick weapons and ar...
Championship Team Takes 13-7 Halftime Lead Over Legendary Team
Marvin Harrison isn't playing in the game, which my keen awareness picked up on sometime in the first quarter. So the backup No. 1 wide receiver for the Colts happens to be Joseph Addai, I guess. He has 107 yards receiving on top of his usual job of 80 yards rushing. He's also filling in for three b...
Hoping The Patriots And Colts Play To A Tie Game
M'kay. It's getting to be that time, so let's get the Patriots-Colts preview out of the way. I hadn't even thought about who I thought would win this game until this weekend, when I put New England in my friend's NFL picks pool. It was a rather anticlimactic and unfulfilling finish to a week of spec...
Colts and Pats Match-Up Poised to Tilt Axis of Earth
The Indianapolis Colts/New England Patriots death-match hype is reaching its condition critical stage, as every single person on the planet tangentially-related to either one of those regions or to sports writing has to have an opinion about it. They must. This is the game of the millennium, you see...
Raiders Fans Would Rather Look Elsewhere, Thank You
It's not easy being a Raiders fan. First off: What goes with black? Seriously! It's also difficult to find time to cheer, what with all the drinking of infant's blood. And worst off, the Raiders' lousy game with the Texans this Sunday happens to be at the same time as The Most Important Battle Betwe...