f Page 3771 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
This Week In Weird Foreign Sports
We tend to find European sports terminology hilarious, mainly because it points to how equally absurd American sports terminology is. We all might know what "a blooper to shallow left" means, but to anyone not intimately familiar with baseball terminology, that's just nonsensical babbling. So here...
Ron Mexico Lives!
The upcoming videogame "Blitz: The League" — a role-playing football game that takes you on and off the field, from the writers of ESPN's allegedly controversial "Playmakers" — has made headlines for signing up Giants Hall of Famer Lawrence Taylor and showcasing rampant drug use and violence in t...
Left On Base: Burning Dolphin Rubber
· Corvette Summer: Dolphins' Quintin Williams arrested for drag racing. [Ft. Lauderdale Sun-Sentinel] · Sorenstam lures opponents into false sense of security at U.S. Open. [The Golf Blog] · What Game 7? Suns, Knicks talk Richardson-Thomas trade. [Sportsaholic] · Transsexual to play in women's socce...
Left On Base: Rose's Sad Gallop Continues
Rose will go to Cooperstown. Don't get excited: he's just signing autographs. [MSNBC] Larry Brown may be talking to Knicks. Yeah, that's just the move to improve your health. [Akron Beacon-Journal] Dodgers: "Screw it, let's just disband." Gagne to have season-ending surgery. [BrownBullfrogBaseball] ...
Those Scary Raiders
The Oakland Raiders. Just that name makes you think of dudes in skull masks, draped in chains, guzzling motor oil and punching their grandmothers in the face. The team added two more malcontents in the offseason: wide receiver Randy Moss — whose Raiders jersey has already become the league's best se...
Ricky Williams Slinks Back Into Town
We still can't quite believe running stoner Ricky Williams is really going to play this year. This guy quit football to smoke pot — and hey, we're not gonna mock him for that; the only difference between him and a lot of our friends is that he actually had a job to quit — and left all his teammate...
Leftovers: WHELP In Cincinnati
Reds fire Dave Miley. Yeah, that'll turn the tide. [Catbird In Nosebleed Seats] Former champ Henin-Hardin upset at Wimbledon. Sad, really. [ Blackhawks fire Brian Sutter for dismal 0-0 record this season. [SportsNetwork] Strauss' second hundred leads England to record one-day score in day-nighter. [...
Old Japanese Man Moves 100 Meters Without Dying
Personally, we had no idea they kept world records for different age groups. If you have to give an all-time record a qualifier, it's not really an all-time record anymore, now is it? We mean, hey, we own the best time in leaping from couch to rapidly burning pizza in stove by someone aged in the...
Leftovers: A Little Bit Of Irish Nipple
Body-part inventory complete: McBride says Tyson "bit my nipple." [Boston Herald] Davenport, Federer wrap up early at Wimbledon, head home to watch some telly. [ESPN] Florida A&M puts self on on double secret probation. [St. Petersberg Times] Calhoun thrown off UConn gravy train, sustains minor inju...
We Bring Tiger Here To Bury, Not To Praise, Him
Yet another reason why being a multi-millionaire athlete that people worship all the world over must be a pain in the ass: People are always looking for you to screw up so they can metaphorically punch you in the face. Two golf strokes, over a 72-hole tournament, ultimately isn't much, but in the ...
You Should See The Trophy They Give For The Jamie Farr Classic
Yeah, sorry, someone sent this to us, and we just couldn't resist....
Leftovers: Bye Bye Spielman
Dolphins GM quits. Sadly, there's no sex tape involved in this one. [Miami Herald] Roger Clemens continues tour of every Major League ballpark. [The Dugout] Bow climbs to top of standings. Chances are she didn't see Warren Sapp up there. [San Francisco Chronicle] Puerta makes French Open finals, sti...
He Does, However, Have Nice Pores
Carolina Panthers defensive tackle Kris Jenkins, after admitting that he "drank too much" in the offseason, sent this Valentine to Raiders defensive tackle Warren Sapp yesterday:...
McNabb, T.O. Continue Lovers' Spat
A confession: We love the havoc that Terrell Owens is wreaking in Philadelphia. That team was getting too boring and too content; the only thing better would be if he had signed with New England. Besides, while T.O. was playing on a broken leg in the Super Bowl, Donovan McNabb was, almost literall...
Leftovers: Childhood Pals Mikan and Almonte Watch Paths Diverge
· You're only as old as you feel: Danny Almonte begins summer baseball season. [Miami Herald] · George Mikan, 80, RIP. NBA's first center of attention has left the building. [NYT]—RC · Ricky, Dolphins a mere $3 million apart. Can world peace be far behind? [Miami Herald] · Colin Montgomerie denies c...
Jake Plummer: Anti-War Activist
Broncos quarterback Jake Plummer fought the NFL last year when he wanted to honor former teammate Pat Tillman by wearing his number on his jersey. Now Plummer, longer-maned and looking awfully MoveOn.Org-y, is taking on a larger target: The government. Plummer is clearly still very upset with the mi...
Do Not Make A Montreal Expo Mad
Remember Ken Hill? The Expos/Cardinals/Rangers/Red Sox pitcher was the type of guy who always destroyed your fantasy team; the year you drafted him high, he collapsed, and the year you didn't draft him, he'd rock on somebody else's team. (He was also the ace on that great 1994 Expos team.)...
Finance As Taught By Spike TV
One considers that there might be dumber ways to pick an agent (like, say, just grabbing some dudes you went to high school with). Detroit Lions second-round pick Shaun Cody picked his agent on reality television. Airing in July on SpikeTV and hosted by Chiefs tight end Tony Gonzalez, the series "...