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Unconscionable Neymar Goal Highlights A Very Brazilian Night Of Soccer
We grab your attention with this, Neymar's first of two scores on the night, a one-of-a-kind run through the Flamengo defense. But we really wanted to highlight the entirety of one of the more thrilling games in recent memory. (If you've got 90 minutes to kill, the whole match is on YouTube)....
A Belated Farewell To Jeff Carter And Mike Richards: The Legion Of Poon
Thanks to a report from Philadelphia Daily News's intrepid Mighty Dan Gross on Monday, two former Flyers are being torched for their excessive nightlife adventures when they were both members of the team. The implication is, subtly, that their reluctance to curb their Jäger-bombing escapades through...
ESPN Interview With Skateboarder Carries On Despite Possible Abduction Of Child
Last week an ESPN crew interviewed Nyjah Huston, a 16-year-old skateboarder from Davis, Calif., to talk about his preparations and expectations for this year's X-Games. Huston's interview is nothing riveting — "um, yeah, like, gonna be sick, like, you know?" — and his cause isn't helped at all by ...
24 Hours At Comic Con
The thing about Comic Con is that, underneath all the geeky costumes and all that other fanboy bullshit, it's still very much a convention. It takes place in a nondescript convention hall that's roughly the size of the Pentagon. The panels take place in big depressing conference rooms that look very...
Chase Utley's Inside-The-Park Homer Is Better Than Anything That Happened In Your Game Tonight
The best part (or worst, if you're a Braves or Mets fan) of all of this is just how excited the crowd, and the announcer, gets. It's late in the game. Philly's already up 5-1, over the Giants, whose 3.62 runs scored per game is the worst among all division leaders. Philly's also got the NL East sa...
A Dejected Tom Ricketts Rides The Train
Sonny in Chicago emailed us today to share an unexpected sighting on his afternoon commute: "I sat on the Metra today, coming back from downtown Chicago to the suburbs, I looked up and what do you know, it's Chicago Cubs owner Tom Ricketts sitting right across from me, on his iPhone with his Cubs ph...
Pac-12 Releases A Highfalutin Hype Video That Arizona State Students Won't Be Able To Understand
We've provided here the full transcription of the purplest and most thesaurus-dependent prose to ever grace a promotional video for a college football conference. College football is back, you guys. Let me rephrase that: college football is back with "an avant garde redesign of the competitive bal...
Dog Feces Vs. Human Feces: WHO YA GOT?!
I was at the gym earlier today and I was in the shower. The shower at the gym has an opaque glass door, but the door only goes up to my neck, so anyone in the locker room can see my big fat alien head while I'm showering. Anyway, I'm standing there washing off, nothing malevolent. And for some reaso...
The Bengals Invite Carson Palmer To Retire
Back in January, former No. 1 draft pick Carson Palmer informed the Cincinnati Bengals that he would "contemplate retirement" if ownership refused to honor his request for a trade. At a press conference today, Bengals owner Mike Brown invited him to begin his contemplation:...
The Incomparable Ichiro Swings Through
Two surefire Hall of Famers played in the Bronx last night. One is having the worst season of his career at 37 years old, hitting nearly 60 points off his lifetime average, and still getting paid $17 million. The other one is Derek Jeter....
Roberto Alomar: Hall Of Famer, T-Shirt Thief
Fiyaz Kanji and Owais Farooqui no longer live in Toronto, where they grew up, but they remain Blue Jays fans nonetheless. So much so, they made the trip to Cooperstown from Boston over the weekend to see Roberto Alomar's enshrinement as the team's first Hall of Famer. But they still can't believe ...
A Special Announcement From Deadspin's Distinguished Dongbudsman About Ron Artest
Greetings, dong-centric readers of Deadspin. Earlier today, we published two stories pertaining to NBA player Ron Artest, soon to be known as Metta World Peace, and his interactions with a young woman through numerous libidinous SMS messages from May of this year. So far, we've only published censor...
My Frustrating Sexting Sessions With Ron Artest
At first, I thought Ron Artest, the man you may now know as Metta World Peace, and I could become friends. Blame my naivete, ego, or optimism, but I really thought this could be platonic....
On The Phone With Ron Artest, And Matthew Hiltzik, The Michael Clayton Of Dong Shots
Is this true? "No, not at all."...
Eric Wedge's Mustache Tweets From The Dead
From an iPhone, no less. When the Mariners' losing streak reached 14 games Saturday night, manager Eric Wedge made the "drastic" decision to shave his 'stache, thinking it might help with karma or whatever. It didn't, as Seattle lost again to Boston yesterday. The People Against Eric Wedge's Mustac...
The Best Argument For Eliminating Offensive Pass Interference
Different football (Australian), different rules (as far as we can tell from watching this televised Calvinball that airs on the wee hours on ESPN2, there are no rules). But we're still awestruck by this move that Carlton's Andrew Walker pulled on Saturday night....
Presenting Your First Photo Of Mr. And Mrs. Ben Roethlisberger
The nuptials have apparently moved from ring-exchange ceremony onto the reception, per the whole #bigbenswedding extravaganza on Twitter. This picture apparently includes the Roethlisbergers and a friend named Mandisa....
Alberto Contador Punches A Heckler, Tour De France Remains Awesome
The carnage at DeathFrance 3000 is not contained to the riders. Today a spectator dressed as a doctor and carrying a blood bag (A reference to his positive drug test at last year's Tour) joined others in running alongside Contador as he tried to make a last-ditch move on the last day in the Alps. ...
Cockblocked By Accessories!
Welcome to Great Moments in Drunken Hookup Failure, where we showcase three heartwarming true stories of drunken love gone horribly awry. Off we go....
Stay Tuned On Monday For A Strange Tale Of Sexting With Ron Artest
I called Ron Artest shortly after two this afternoon, for the second time. I wanted to talk about dong shots, and a story we're running Monday about a girl with whom he had a sexy-texting relationship. She wrote for us about the bizarre comedy of texting with Ron Artest. She didn't ask us for money,...