fl Page 1217 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
NFL Week 9 Preview: Perhaps You've Heard Of Tom Brady And Peyton Manning
• Colts @ Patriots. All week long, the Brady/Manning hype machine has been working harder than the Vader-esque panel inserted in Al Davis's chest. For two reasons, though, I don't mind. First, it could be much worse... imagine if this game was on ESPN. And secondly, it is Manning vs. Brady, and it i...
Time For Manning-Brady ... Uh ... What Number Are We On Now?
You might have heard: The Colts play the Patriots this weekend, which means it's time for more Brady vs. Manning stories. We think everyone's issues with Peyton Manning are nicely summed up by Kissing Suzy Kolber:...
Ricky Williams Has Had Just About Enough Of Canada, Thanks
For those of you not up on your Grey Cup, the East semifinals are this weekend, featuring the Winnipeg Blue Bombers against the Toronto Argonauts and our old friend Ricky Williams. During a practice interview — the interview was real, but it was after practice, if you'll forgive our somewhat mispl...
Stop Shuler Surrenders To The Polls
We have told you before about the noble quest of StopShuler.com, produced by a group of Redskins fans who want to keep their former quarterback — and current Congressional candidate — Heath Shuler from returning to Washington....
Shawne Merriman's Flimsy "Excuses"
So San Diego Chargers linebacker Shawne Merriman has decided to accept his four-game suspension for steroids, while making it clear that it was an accidental positive test as a result of an over-the-counter supplement....
Please, Sir, Keep The Gutteral Utterances To Yourself
This is Al Argibay, and he has a goatee and, we presume, walks around making this arm motion all day. And he's pissed, because he was just thrown out of his gym for grunting too loud....
You Stay Classy, Buffalo
The wisdom of sending more of our troops to Iraq is making less and less sense to us, mostly because there are bitter, liquored-up Bills fans wandering around with nothing to do. Meet Patriots' fan Barry Donaghey, who was simply trying to enjoy a tailgate celebration with his pregnant wife followi...
No More Vroom Vroom For Big Ben
So the Steelers are falling apart right now, losing to the freaking Raiders last week, and at the center of all of it is quarterback Ben Roethlisberger, who has had an awfully busy few months for a guy who didn't play all that well in the Super Bowl. Concussions, emergency surgery, road mishaps ... ...
Clinton Portis Is Keeping Curious Company
We'll confess, we don't watch that "Flavor Of Love" show on VH-1; we remember once having good thoughts about Flavor Flav, many years ago, and just seeing the highlights of the show makes us extremely uncomfortable, like we're watching Reagan in the last throes of Alzheimer's or something. (We bet...
Drew Brees Hates The Witch He Has For A Mom
If Saints quarterback Drew Brees and his mother were, you know, speaking to each other, this would make for a rather awkward Thanksgiving. Fortunately, he hates her!...
Steelers Choose To Stay The Course
We should be saving this for our Heartfelt Fridays post, but, you know, we couldn't wait. So ... sorry. In the Steelers' press conference on Tuesday, coach Bill Cowher said that he is officially taking the blame for the team's 2-5 start, warning everyone to lay off of quarterback Ben Roethlisberge...
Flyers Spectators Almost As Comical As Team Itself
As we mentioned at the top, we're Flyers fans. It's a classy organization* with a rich history and a sense of pride in its traditions. Then, you know, there's this:...
It's An Intriguing Night In Prince Country
Kind of a quietly fascinating game tonight on "Monday Night Football:" The Patriots, who keep winning even though no one's particularly impressed by them, travel to face the Vikings, who have attempted to fix their sex boat-related woes by hiring a bald mustached man who appears to have never had se...
We're Freaking McNuts, Man, And We McLove It
You know ... it's possible that Eagles fans are becoming rather upset with their team's play of late....
NFL Week Eight, Update #4
• Colts 34, Broncos 31. If the Colts weren't the class of the AFC before this week, they certainly are now. They went into Mile High against a nearly impenetrable defense, hung 34 points on them, and got the win on the foot of Adam Vinatieri. No one else has come close to being able to do that to De...
NFL Week Eight, Update #3
• San Diego 14, St. Louis 7. Shawne Merriman has two sacks for the Chargers, and has been awfully jubilant about them for a guy with such a large and dark cloud hanging over his head. It would take an even bigger set of balls, though, if he were to mimic jabbing a syringe into his ass after he got a...
NFL Week Eight, Update #2
• Jaguars 13, Eagles 6. Alright, the Eagles officially aren't that good. You may have figured this out before me, but I'm now convinced. They just managed six points in a home game that they pretty much had to win. The Garrard/Leftwich issue was probably not a factor... the Jags won while getting 87...
NFL Week Eight, Update #1
• Baltimore 28, New Orleans 7. The Ravens have completely bottled up Dulymus McAllister and Reggie Bush... combined rushing and receiving, Bush and McAllister have combined for a total of 7 yards. The Ravens are doing just about anything they want... save for one long Drew Brees to Joe Horn TD pas...
Week 8 NFL Preview:
Falcons @ Bengals. Chad Johnson—er, excuse me—Ocho Cinco has promised two touchdowns and two endzone dances, and if he doesn't deliver, I'm never going to forgive him. I said last week that the Panthers/Bengals game was probably our last chance this year for a good endzone celebration, but Chad John...