fl Page 1236 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Clinton Portis' Supermarket Sweep
Ever wonder what Clinton Portis might do if given $10,000 to spend in a Best Buy in the span of half an hour? Jeez, who hasn't?...

Culpepper: Lap Dances? Who, Me?
We don't want to overstate — and it probably won't happen, anyway — but if Vikings sex boat gods Daunte Culpepper and Bryant McKinnie get their way, we might be in for the real trial of the century....

Some 1 A.M. Bowl Goodness
We're never reminded more of just how old we're getting than when we watch college freshmen play sports. Penn State kicker Kevin Kelly, we swear, has to be lying on his birth certificate; there's no way he's older than 12. The poor kid finally erased the chances he'd be a Buckner-type goat by fina...

A Match Made In ... Well, In Detroit
We were marvelling this morning at the potential news: Matt Millen and the Detroit Lions are bringing in former Saints coach Jim Haslett for a job interview. We don't necessarily think that hiring Haslett would bring the Fire Millen crowd much closer to dragging the guy out of his house and having...

Orange Bowl: A Contrast In Coaches
Everyone's making a huge deal about the coaching legends Joe Paterno and Bobby Bowden facing off in the Orange Bowl tonight. They're the two winningest coaches in Division I-A history, and they're both still going strong. It's nice when old people do well....

Ma Sweets Will Punch You In The Mouth
What kind of woman would raise a man who would wear a costume like this? What kind of woman could raise such a spawn?...

Saying Goodbye To Tice (And Others)
The grand tradition of the day after the NFL season came through in full force this year: Six NFL coaches were relieved from their duties on "Black Monday." One of them, Dick Vermeil — who is about to be played by Greg Kinnear in a new movie — retired, but everyone else went down like a sack of so...

Southeast Jerome In Heaven With Friends
OK, so as we showed you yesterday, Clinton Portis brought along some pals for his press conference yesterday. The conceit was that Southeast Jerome — who had been previously considered "lost" — had died and made it to heaven with all his friends. They included:...

Clinton Portis And His New Friends
We'll get into this more tomorrow ... but if you go to Redskins.com right now, you'll see that our man Clinton Portis has, uh, brought a few friends along for his weekly psychological exploration....

FSU Linebacker Accused Of Rape
Florida State linebacker A.J. Nicholson — linebacker prospect "No. 5B" on Mel Kiper's draft ratings — has been accused of rape. According to the Ft. Lauderdale Sun-Sentinal, Nicholson is accused of raping a "19-year-old acquaintence" at a Broward hotel. He has been suspended by coach Bobby Bowden ...

Dungy Returns To Coach Colts
The Indianapolis Star reports that Tony Dungy has returned to the Colts and will be on the sidelines for Sunday's game against the Buzzsaw That Is The Arizona Cardinals. He is scheduled to conduct this afternoon's practice session. He has been away from his team for exactly a week and spoke at his...

The Sad, Sorry Last Days Of Brett Favre
We probably should have seen this coming: Now that it's pretty much obvious to everyone on the planet that Packers quarterback Brett Favre should retire before he shows up in a Buzzsaw That Is The Arizona Cardinals jersey, Emmitt Smith-style, Favre is going on one of his typical passive-aggressive...

Signs, Signs, Everywhere Signs
It does seem like this has been happening a lot of late: The Buffalo Bills a couple of weeks ago didn't allow several fans to bring their anti-management signs into Ralph Wilson Stadium, threatening them with ejection if they didn't throw the sign away. The Associated Press interviews Mike Allenba...

Big Ben's Prom Date
We were just sent this infinitely amusing photo from Saturday's Steelers-Browns game. This woman apparently went to prom with Pittsburgh quarterback Ben Roethlisberger and is broadcasting it to the world. (This is why being famous is terrifying; somewhere out there, there are pictures of our junio...

Jim Mora, Blowin' Up!
Four days after his outburst following the Falcons' playoff hopes-ending loss to Tampa Bay last week, Atlanta coach Jim Mora Jr. is still doing damage control. In case you missed it, Mora, doing a radio interview with the Falcons' affiliate after the game, flipped out after being asked about a que...

Debating Dungy's MySpace Profile
Like anyone who watched yesterday's heartwrenching press conference held by Colts coach Tony Dungy after his son James' funeral, we were touched, saddened and overall deflated by Dungy's straightforwardness and obvious devastatation. We continue to find the speculation about when Dungy will return...

Saying Goodbye To Tempe
No one on the planet noticed it on Saturday, but, as it turns out, another Cardinals team said goodbye to its stadium this year....

James Dungy's MySpace Profile
A terribly ghoulish way to start your post-holiday break, we agree, and, honestly, we've questioned ourselves as to whether or not this is the type of thing we should be posting about. But we tend to take the viewpoint that if something is out there, and it might be of interest, we owe it to you t...

The "End" Of Monday Night Football
Like most people who watched last night's typically dull "Monday Night Football" finale, we enjoyed all the old clips from years past, the Howard Cosells, the Dandy Dons, the O.J. Simpsons, oh, how we loved the O.J. Simpsons. (And of course, Dennis Miller, whose "dark" sarcastic edge was wasted by...

An Orgy Of Sorgi
Peyton Manning's day was limited to 12 attempts, and it's been all Jim Sorgi since. The headline might be a little misleading; Sorgi hasn't actually done anything remarkable, good or bad. He's 7/11 for 46 yards, 0 TDs, and 0 INTs. I really just liked the rhyme....