football Page 715 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
DeSean Jackson's End Zone Brainfartery Will Be Overlooked — For Now
Yes, last night was disappointing in many ways, but it has not completely killed my faith: I still like my team. If anything, last night's Eagles/Cowboys game proved that Donovan McNabb is fully-recovered and that DeSean Jackson, Philadelphia's own Barack Obama, is still on pace to be the greatest E...
The National Anthem? Josh Howard 'Doesn't Celebrate That S***'
Mark Cuban may want to huddle up with Josh Howard at some point and explain the implications of talking on camera in the YouTube generation. The scene is the Allen Iverson Celebrity Summer Classic flag football game this past July, featuring all of your favorite celebrities; DeAngelo Hall, Larry Joh...
Bob Griese Sets A New Standard for Announcing Objectivity By Waving Purdue Flag During "Shout"
ESPN/ABC assigned Bob Griese, a Purdue alum, to call the Purdue-Oregon game this weekend. On Friday we posted that Erin Andrews felt the need to defend her objectivity after the Florida-Miami game. Well, it should be interesting to see what the response is from Bob Griese after he took a Purdue fla...
College Football Roundup: Charlie Weis Is Broken
After a week of piddling interest, college football returned with a vengeance. Before I get rolling with 11 observations on the weekend that was, let me take this opportunity to get this before the jump. Our fearless editor is going to have a full-report from OSU-USC, but let's just say it now, can...
For These Prices I Could Send My Car To Summer Camp. Am I Right, Folks?
So why is price gouging illegal in hurricane-ravaged areas of Texas and Louisiana, but scenes such as this on Saturday at the LA Coliseum go virtually unnoticed? To recap, there were some Ohio State fans who paid $500 apiece for tickets to the USC game (those were the cheap ones), then had to break ...
Creative Ways to Cheat Your Way to Success Back at the Office
Over the weekend, we've been presented with numerous ways to succeed by circumventing unfair and inappropriate "rules" meant to hurt you and not others by not giving you everything you want immediately. As we close out this weekend, let us give you the tools used by sports teams across the globe so ...
NFL Update: Week 2 Early Games Final
• Bears 17, Panthers 20- sigh. Jonathan Stewart scored his second TD with under four minutes left to secure the win. Oh, and a stalled Bears drive failed to bring them back. • Bills 20, Jaguars 16 - Trent Edwards (20-25, 239 yds.) charged back with 10 points in the fourth to steal the win. • Giants ...
NFL Update: Week 2 Third Quarter
• Bears 17, Panthers 13- Carolina rudely won't give up to the Neckbeard's superiority (17-23, 140 yards). Also: holding, Chicago. • Bills 10, Jaguars 16 - Maurice Jones-Drew scores a TD on a 74-yard drive for the Jaguars. • Giants 20, Rams 6 - Eli Manning: 17-26, 202 yds, 2 TDs, 86 commercials. Welc...
NFL Update: Week 2 Halftime
• Bears 10, Panthers 3- Both teams traded field goals in the second quarter. Matt Forte has 15 carries for 43 yards. • Bills 10, Jaguars 3 - Fred Jackson has four catches for 50 yards. • Giants 13, Rams 6 - Both teams traded field goals and then traded field goals again, including one at the half. E...
That's Why They Call It Special Teams
Chris Myers gave himself a water bukkake before the Bears-Panthers game. We're pretty sure we never need to see that again. In fact, we're stepping away in a moment to invent a time machine so we can step back in time to smash our television set just before it happened and then tell our self in the ...
OMG LT Is Down (Maybe)! Begin Looting Now!
Your Sunday morning NFL headlines to adjust your line... up of food for: • LaDainian Tomlinson's owie toe may keep him off the field (or, you know, not) for the Chargers' attempt to topple Denver down to sea level. Regardless, we require six in-depth profiles of his backups by Monday morning. After ...
Charlie Weis Tears Two Ligaments in Knee While Simply Standing Around
Charlie Weis got Theismen'd yesterday during the Notre Dame v. Michigan game. Did the fact that he was standing on the sidelines and not actually on the field make the rotund coach feel any more embarrassed? Heck no! After the game, Weis found out he tore two ligaments in his knee and he seemed rath...
Nuts v. Contraceptives: #5 Ohio State-#1 USC
Actually, the Southern California Trojans have already won this game by 24 points, but the NCAA by-laws dictate they have to go ahead and play the game anyway. Everybody important is at the game, except you. And, well, me. So let's get through this impending Buckeyes massacre together, shall we? Oh,...
Hugh Johnson IV: Hugh Can't Mess With the Bulldogs
South Carolina put up a tremendous fight and gave us the exciting college football we all hope for early in September. No. 2 ranked Georgia had the ball bounce their way throughout the day, literally in the end zone at one point, but SC never quit. A nice two minute drill put together by Chris Smell...
Cal's Jahvid Best Loses His Lunch
The early games have been rather boring this afternoon but California's Jahvid Best is having considerably less fun than you are today. As Jamie Mottram put it, "Maryland is beating the puke out of Cal." Literally....
Why Are There So Many Posts About Hugh?
Maryland is running all over the 23rd ranked Cal Bears. So far we've learned that Jim Henson is a former Terp and that Cal isn't very good. Be sure to send your brilliant observations to "The Hugh Johnson" via AIM. So a cal wide receiver just got knocked out basically and threw up his green Gatorade...
We Find Ourselves Rather Disliking Ike
Galveston, Houston and much of the Gulf Coast stay in lockdown mode this morning, waiting still to assess the human and structural damage as Hurricane Ike, freak storm that it appears to be, drags a huge storm surge over the Texas coast. However, we do have a preliminary assessment of the effect on...
At Last ... The USC-Ohio State Sideline VIP List Is Here
The Fonz, Isiah Thomas, Ed Helms and Greg Oden are only a few of the celebrities who have been granted sideline VIP passes to Saturday's USC-Ohio State extravaganza, so get your cameras ready if you're going to attend. I happen to know that a certain A.J. Daulerio will be there as well, although not...
Terrelle Pryor Is a God Amongst Boys
Need something new, something fresh that doesn't involve Beanie Wells' foot or how many times Pete Carroll is going to look at himself on the television feed of the game? Here's a long profile piece on Terrelle Pryor — the Buckeyes' star recruit at quarterback — who many Buckeyes feel has been hidde...
South Carolina Prepares for Georgia With a Lunch-Time Brawl At the Student Union
Oh, those wacky, dedicated football players. The fight took place at Russell House, which despite it's quaint evocation of an antebellum bed and breakfast, is evidently a main dining hall on campus. Five football players scrapped with five "non-students," who were evidently impressed by the Zagat Gu...