football Page 747 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
They May Take Our Lives, But They'll Never Take OUR PENIS!
Indiana police and Purdue campus security will be keeping a sharp eye on the student section at Ross Ade Stadium on Saturday. Why? This letter, received by the Purdue student newspaper on Tuesday, should explain things:...
How Freddie Spent His Weekend
In case you were wondering what former Philadelphia Eagles shitball Freddie Mitchell is up to ... he's out taunting fans at UCLA games from the stands! Hey, sure beats playing; we understand, Freddie....
The Extremely Serious Flag Football Team
Everybody has a great "Rec league opponent who takes the game WAY too seriously" story unless, of course, you are that rec league opponent who takes the game way too seriously, in which case, we're sorry, we'll try harder, we need to focus, yeah, you were open on that play, we know....
You Will Only Spill Your Blood For Me!
It's important for a high school football coach to have his priorities in order. That order?...
He's Got Some Great Open-Field Moves
We did not see this over the weekend, but apparently, after California's win over Washington on Saturday, Golden Bears running back Marshawn Lynch got a hold of the motorized stretcher cart and went to town. This is yet another reason, as we all know, we need the bullpen car back....
We Have Ways Of Making Your Mascot Talk
Oh, those crazy Ivy Leaguers. What won't they do in the name of ribald gridiron revelry?...
Re-Examining The Shotgun Formation
Castro Valley, Calif.'s reign as Deranged Youth Sports Capital of the U.S. lasted exactly 24 hours. Today Philadelphia wrestles away the title with determination and panache, as one of its wonderfully colorful youth football parents sets the bar impossibly high. Let's look in, shall we?...
The Mike Tyson Of College Football
That was Miami Hurricane player Anthony Reddick apologizing for his helmet-swinging role in the brawl against FIU. I'm pretty sure someone wrote that for him... and they must've just scribbled it really quickly and illegibly, because he seemed to be struggling with it. For some reason....
Taking Down The Field Goal Posts: Purple Is The New Black
(13) Georgia Tech 7, (12) Clemson 31. Clemson was a little early for Halloween, but their Grimace costumes were a hit anyway. Clemson officials claim that no team had ever worn head-to-toe purple in the modern era of college football, but didn't seem to understand that there's was a reason for tha...
Hugh Johnson Project, Update 4
I've had 14 beers, 3 shots, and smoked a joint, and i sound less drunk thank Mike Gottfried. - nator76...
I Don't Think This Is What Lil' Jon Had In Mind
Illinois, despite holding a second half lead, couldn't hold on to beat Penn State today, but if you're an Illini fan, take heart. At least it wasn't your fans in that video....
Hugh Johnson Project, Update 3
So the Duke band apparently staged a "brawl" at the Miami game... any video out there? - Holly...
Hugh Johnson Project, Update 2
You know why I love SEC Football? Because during timeouts they go to promos for Brooks & Dunn concerts at the National Rodeo Finals. - Josh Da Cane...
Hugh Johnson Project, Update 1
Paul Hornung's pants fell off at the Notre Dame pep rally last night. Look into this. - J from ND...
That's An Unwieldy Office Pool
So, you know how some college basketball coaches, eager to have a tournament win or two to impress the boosters, have talked about having a tournament that incorporates all Division I-A teams? Well, in Wisconsin, they're actually trying something like this: They're starting a tournament with a 224 t...
You Can Shove Your Sorrys In A Sack, Mister
The week began with violence and bravado, but has concluded in ignominious regret. Yes, it's time for the "sorry" roundup. And while none of these apologies rise to the level of that of that of the great Pete Rose, rest assured that all of the participants are nonetheless terribly filled with sham...
Up On The Roof
The place: Midvale, Utah. The event: Youth football game: The crime: Terrorism. The weapon: Lawn chair. The date: Well, a couple of days ago, actually....
Today In Broadcasting History
So what now for Lamar Thomas? It's ironic that the only real loser in the big UofM-FIU battle on Saturday was the guy sitting in the announcer's booth — albeit a guy who wanted to get down there and mix it up, or so he said. Thomas, as you know, was cast adrift by Comcast Southeast Sports on Monda...
I Had A Girl, Donna Was Her Name
It seems as if University of Miami president Donna Shalala is forever defending the behavior of her students — she reminds us a lot of Mrs. Garrett from Facts of Life that way — and Tuesday was no exception. Appearing at a coaches' press conference, the feisty administrator said that it was time t...
Lamar Thomas Speaks (Kind Of)
We're having trouble locating it specifically on CanesTime, the message board for Miami football, but several other Scout.com boards have posted what is allegedly a message from recently fired Miami Hurricanes radio broadcaster Lamar Thomas, whose now infamous tirade about beating down FIU players h...