fucking Page 5 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Oh, Hell Yeah, The Brewers Are Going For It
Scarcely an hour after acquiring Christian Yelich in a trade with the Marlins, the Brewers have gotten themselves another outfielder: Lorenzo Cain, signed to a five-year, $80 million deal as reported by ESPN’s Jerry Crasnick and first broken by The Athletic’s Ken Rosenthal....
Christian Yelich Freed From Miami, Joins Surprisingly Fun Brewers Club
The hot stove is warm, baby. A week after Christian Yelich’s agent announced the outfielder’s relationship with the Marlins was “irretrievably broken,” he’s been shipped off to the Brewers in exchange for a solid haul of prospects: outfielders Lewis Brinson and Monte Harrison, second baseman Isan Di...
Someone Please Turn The Hot Stove Back On, The Stove Is Very Cold
Is it that this year’s free-agent class is underwhelming? Is it a lack of suitable trade partners? Is it the widespread concerns about the changes to the luxury tax penalties acting as a soft salary cap? Is it that the next few years should have blockbuster signings? Is it that everyone is on vacati...
Rays Trade Away Face Of The Franchise For Bad Reasons
Various baseball insiders are reporting that the stove is hot this morning. Rays third baseman Evan Longoria has been shipped to the Giants in exchange for Denard Span and some other stuff:...
Christian Yelich And J.T. Realmuto Are Fed Up With The Marlins
The Miami Marlins spent the last two weeks trading most of their players worth a shit elsewhere, and now, the rest of their players who are worth a shit are reportedly unhappy with the team’s management....
Dodgers Shift Money Around To Set Up Massive Future Splurge
The hot stove may have taken a while to preheat, but it is now, um, cooking! New York Post baseball guy Joel Sherman is reporting that the Dodgers have acquired Matt Kemp from the Atlanta Braves, in exchange for Adrián González, Scott Kazmir, Brandon McCarthy, Charlie Culberson, and cash. ...
CC Sabathia Returning To Yankees To Complete "Unfinished Business"
C.C. Sabathia’s free agency presumably got a lot simpler after the Yankees, who came achingly close to advancing to the World Series back in October, went out and snagged the reigning National League MVP. To absolutely no one’s great surprise, Sabathia would prefer to spend his age-38 season getting...
White Sox Acquire Cash Considerations
The hot stove is burning to the touch, and the Chicago White Sox are, as usual, stoking the flames. In today’s Rule 5 draft, they used the fourth overall pick on Carlos Tocci, a frail-looking outfielder in the Philadelphia Phillies’ system who’s hit .266/.317/.377 in his minor-league career. Somewha...
Report: Marlins Continue Setting Themselves On Fire, Trade Marcell Ozuna To Cardinals
The Miami Marlins, an alleged major league club in the NL East, are carrying on with their plan to strip the franchise bare and trade off all their players worth a damn. Giancarlo Stanton is a Yankee, Dee Gordon is a Mariner, everyone else is available, and now Marcell Ozuna is a Cardinal. Jesse San...
Here's The Only Hot Stove Glossary You'll Ever Need
Today marks the first full day of baseball’s Winter Meetings, that wonderful annual gathering in which baseball executives text each other trade proposals in closer physical proximity to one another than is usually the case while baseball writers repeatedly get drunk at the same hotel bar. This spec...
St. Louis Cardinals Release Statement Announcing That Giancarlo Stanton Has Owned Them<em></em>
Ken Rosenthal reported Thursday that baseball murderer Giancarlo Stanton will not waive his no-trade clause for the Giants or Cardinals. (The Astros and Cubs remain in the mix, albeit behind the Yankees and Dodgers.) Stanton’s refusal to go to St. Louis wasn’t a hypothetical one, according to the Ca...
The Giants Are Going For Giancarlo Stanton
Baseball’s hot stove is preheating, but nothing major can really get cooking until the winter’s two big deals get done. The first, Japanese import Shohei Ohtani, appears to have no timeline. But the second, the expected trade of Marlins slugger Giancarlo Stanton, sounds like it’s gathering momentum....
The Hot Stove Is Now Slightly Above Room Temperature
It is now almost December, and baseball’s hot stove remains distinctly not hot. A bunch of guys are in the kitchen talking about lighting the stove and filling out questionnaires for the chance to set everything on fire, but the stove itself? Not hot. (The main stove, that is. The little campfire st...
Report: Bucks Trade For Eric Bledsoe, Who Better Not Mess This Up
The word from Woj is that the Phoenix Suns have finally found a suitable trade partner for talented but grumpy point guard Eric Bledsoe, who hasn’t played for the team since tweeting “I don’t wanna be here” on October 22. Bledsoe appears to be headed for Milwaukee:...
This Fucking Heiress Kicked Her Horse!
Jazz Johnson-Merton, a 36-year-old heiress to the Johnson & Johnson fortune, competed in a show jumping event earlier this month. At one point, the dreaded heiress fell off her horse and got so mad that she kicked the poor animal....
Do The Astros Need Justin Verlander?
Justin Verlander’s contract is so big that the Tigers had no fear any other team would want it. After the traditional trade deadline passed at the end of July, Verlander and the $28 million he’s owed in each of the next two years easily cleared revocable waivers, making the 34-year-old Tiger still e...
Report: Yu Darvish Is Officially For Sale
Rangers ace Yu Darvish is 30 years old, will be a free agent after this season, and is pitching at the high level he always does when healthy for a team that’s lost more than it’s won, all of which has made him a pretty obvious candidate to get moved before this month’s trade deadline. Now, accordin...
Cleveland's Offseason Is Turning Into A Real Nightmare
Dan Gilbert and the Cavaliers have made a massive fucking mess of the 2017 NBA offseason. It’s hard to believe a team that can basically sleepwalk backwards through the regular season and wake up in the Finals would find itself seemingly on the brink of total meltdown, but here we are....
Indiana's Haul From The Paul George Trade Is Looking Worse And Worse
This morning ESPN dropped a long and richly detailed account of the circumstances that surrounded and led to Kyrie Irving’s surprise trade request, first reported Friday afternoon, in which he told Cavs owner Dan Gilbert that he no longer wants to play in Cleveland. It seems Irving’s dissatisfaction...
Actually 2017 Is Very Good, John Wall Signed His Max Extension
Rejoice, my good friends, for the mighty John Wall, in his profound wisdom, has signed a 4-year, $170 million contract extension with the Washington Wizards. We have come through dark times indeed, but at last we are delivered to a better day. Whew! ...