fur Page 7 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Stuffed Goat Mascot Stolen From Navy Tailgate
Fearless, the life-sized stuffed goat who usually chills out atop his owner's car before Navy games, should not be confused with Bill XXXI, Navy's live goat mascot. But he is a regular fixture at Navy pregames, and he has been kidnapped....
The U.S. Rolls Over And Europe Roars Back To Win The Ryder Cup
Oh, fuck! The European team just stole the Ryder Cup despite beginning the day well behind on points to the U.S. team. Three Americans lost both 17 and 18 (the U.S. went 0/7 on the 17th hole), the 10-6 lead the U.S. came in with today was not safe, and Gene Wojciechowski's "Ryder Cup all but locked...
The NHL Lockout's First Casualty: Florida Has Laid Off Mascot Stanley C. Panther
A work stoppage in sports, obviously, affects more than the players and owners. It takes a ton of people to make hockey go, from referees and broadcasters to concessionaires and janitors. And it's always the little guys who are first to go when the money stops rolling in....
Minor League Mascot Eats It In ATV Crash
Rip Tide, blue fursuited embodiment of the Triple A Norfolk Tides, was out for his usual four-wheeler cruise around the stadium when he took the right field turn a little too sharp. Rip Tide was unharmed but embarrassed (especially when he couldn't get his ATV running again), and I think The Oriol...
Minor League Mascot Placed On DL With Third-Degree Costume Burns
Uncle Slam, mascot for the Class A Potomac Nationals, was placed on the 60-day disabled list and will miss the remainder of the season. The release, from the baby Nats:...
ESPN Cameras Caught Rafael Furcal With His Pants Down
With an on-premises pool and the overall clothing-optional vibe of Miami, the new Marlins ballpark is ripe for sighting people without their pants on. We just figured the first person to be spotted sin pantalones would be a spectator, not a player. But ESPN did us right by grabbing this shot of t...
The Brooklyn Dodgers Did Not Mind If You Photographed Their Pubes And Asses
At least for the A's and Mariners in Tokyo, Opening Day is early Wednesday morning. With the return of baseball comes the return of casual nudity, an inescapable fact of locker rooms since the days before the West Coast had teams....
The Rays Now Lead The AL East In Mascots
Say hello to DJ Kitty, who has crossed over from scoreboard videos to a real live man-in-suit. Don't worry, there's still a home for Raymond (who, as I learned from his bio, is actually a Canus Manta Whatthefluffalus). It's just that the Rays wanted to be the first team to get their mascot-to-specta...
Obie The Orange Bowl Mascot Leaves The Hospital, Probably With A Really Intense Painkiller Addiction
It's been nearly a week since Obie was destroyed by WVU's Darwin Cook, and he (she!) is in for a lifetime of physical therapy and never-ending pain. But, baby steps. The Orange Bowl tweeted a photo of Obie leaving the hospital this afternoon, with a message for Cook....
After Being Leveled By Darwin Cook, The Orange Bowl Mascot Will Never Juice Again
This actually came at the end of the 99-yard fumble recovery we showed you last night, and raises a greater paradox than Schrödinger's cat: how do you decapitate a mascot that is only a head? Darwin Cook tried his damndest with a clothesline on Obie, the anthropomorphic Orange Bowl orange....
Molesty Sixers Mascot Needs Somebody Inside Him
We're just going to assume that B. Franklin Dogg is going to win the fan vote to become the next 76ers mascot, because his bedroom eyes and S&M collar make us laugh every time. He's McGruff, the Sex Crime Dog. "Hey kids! B. Franklin Dogg's van is full of candy!"...
A Perfectly Designed Killing Machine, The Phillie Phanatic Silently Stalks Its Prey
If you take nothing else from this insane week in sports, let it be the fact that the Phillie Phanatic was born in the Galapagos Islands. MLB has photos of the Philadelphia mascot furbirdthing "returning to his homeland" to terrify wildlife and hawk his book to local children. [MLB.com via The700Lev...
Your 76ers Mascot Choices Are A.) Patriotic B.) Molesty C.) Tripping Balls
Hip-Hop is dead. But of the contenders to the throne—Big Ben, B. Franklin Dogg, and Phil E. Moose—only one can represent the Sixers with hot dog cannons blazing. It's up to you to vote, but there's not really a lesser of three evils here. [Sixers.com]...
Astronaut Plays One-Man Baseball Game In Space
Satoshi Furukawa, an astronaut with the Japan Aerospace Exploration Agency, played a one-man game of baseball at the International Space Station a few weeks ago. He only managed two outs, but to be fair, he was pitching, batting, and fielding in outer space at the time....
Forgive Us For Overlooking The Brewers Fan Drinking Through A Horse Mask Last Night
Some good baseball last night. Hell, even the Milwaukee/Pittsburgh game mattered a little, in the sense that the Brewers now have home field in their NLDS. Tipster Steven F. was there to see it. But, he got distracted in the process of doing so. To wit:...
Somebody Stole A Minor-League Baseball Mascot's Head And That Makes People Sad
"'Stomper' the bear disappeared from All Pro Freight Stadium in Avon [Ohio] sometime last month. With eight games left to go in the season, fans immediately took notice. 'He's a little overweight and that keeps him warm in the winters. He's fun-loving and loves to dance,' said Crushers V.P. Dan He...
You Can Now Buy The Amarillo Sox Mascot That Had A Huge Erection
The Amarillo Sox Sock had one priapic night in the spotlight, before being consigned to the bottom of the hamper of history. Now the independent league Sox are auctioning off the outfit, presumably for use in sex pervert games, with all proceeds going to charity. [eBay]...
Curtis Granderson And The Orioles's Mascot Shared A Moment This Afternoon
It's impossible to determine exactly what Yankees centerfielder Curtis Granderson and the Oriole Bird were discussing during pregame calisthenics....
The Nationals Are Now Using Their Mailing List To Send Fans Ads For Discount Furniture
Damn it, Bob of Bob's Discount Furniture. We expected more out of you. Never mind that you already advertise during Mets and Red Sox games. The Nationals? Really?...
Rafael Furcal Is Super-Uncoordinated
Via Buster Olney: "Rafael Furcal sprained his thumb when bracing a fall, after tripping over a rope near the batting cage here in Wrigley." If he's this clumsy while sober, we'd hate to see him drunk....