go Page 259 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Don Mattingly Is Ready For Robot Umpires
Marlins manager Don Mattingly watched his team get very nearly no-hit by electrifying Padres ace Chris Paddack Wednesday night, in what would’ve been the first no-hitter in Padres history. Paddack gave up his first hit, a solo dinger to Starlin Castro, in the bottom of the eighth inning, and eventua...
"Mai Tai Guy" Has No Regrets Over Stealing Walk-Off Home Run Ball From Kids
The Cubs beat the Reds in dramatic, walk-off fashion on Tuesday night, as Kyle Schwarber hit a 10th-inning dinger to put an exclamation point on a Chicago day that had already seen the capture of notorious alligator Chance the Snapper. And as one minor local reptilian celebrity was consigned to a bu...
FIFA Puts An End To The Scourge Of Amazing, Impossible Goalkeeper Goals
Goalkeepers occasionally score goals. Some turn it into an art form; Brazil’s Rogério Ceni scored 131 times. Still, a game where a goalkeeper scores is rare. Even rarer still: a goalkeeper throwing the ball into the other team’s net for a goal....
Canelo Álvarez Seems To Have Lost Gennady Golovkin's Phone Number
Middleweight champion Canelo Álvarez released a statement Wednesday announcing that, for the first time since 2015, he will not be fighting his traditional bout on Mexican Independence Day weekend in September. Álvarez—who’s generally a safe bet to box on that weekend as well as Cinco de Mayo weeken...
Tupac-Obsessed Iowa Public Servant Resigns In Mystery
The Iowa Department for Human Services provides services to the poor, children, senior citizens, and people with mental illness, addictions, or disabilities. Jerry Foxhoven, a retired law professor, was appointed to head up the agency in 2017, and until he was ousted last month, he added another di...
Manny Machado Calls Eric Byrnes And Dan Plesac The "Biggest Tools Out There"
Manny Machado, while lounging at home and watching MLB Network last night, decided to pop off his shirt, log into Instagram, and get some things off his chest. What followed was a solid three minutes of Machado shitting on MLB Network commentators Dan Plesac and Eric Byrnes while pointing out the le...
Steve Kerr Tentatively Reminds Shaq Of Obligation To Kiss Kerr's Cheese-Covered Feet
Back in 2005, Shaquille O’Neal thought no coach would ever match what Phil Jackson did with the Lakers between 2000 to 2004: guide a team to the Finals four out of five years. “It will never be done again,” Shaq said, promising to kiss the cheese-covered feet of any person that did it, on a TV show ...
Let The Alligator Throw The First Pitch
Chance the Snapper—a Chicago alligator who gained fame last week when he was first noticed living in the Humboldt Park lagoon—was taken into custody Tuesday morning by reptile expert Frank Robb, who was hired specifically to grab the creature. Before he was apprehended, the 5-foot-3 Chance captured ...
Pete Alonso's Charming "English Muffin" Quote, Like Most Precious Things In Life, Was A Sham
Before Mets slugger Pete Alonso participated in the Home Run Derby during the all-star break, he earned a little moment with this seemingly off-the-cuff quip: “It doesn’t matter how much jelly you have in the jar, it’s about how you spread it on your English muffin.” That’s funny. Well, guess what? ...
Fernando Tatis Jr. Bends Fabric Of Space And Time, Avoids Getting Tagged Out
It appeared as though Braves pitcher Mike Soroka was about the record the first out of his appearance against the Padres on Sunday. With an 0-2 count against Eric Hosmer, Soroka picked off Fernando Tatis Jr., who had a considerable lead at first base. Tatis Jr. was then caught in a rundown and, afte...
Doc Gooden Arrested Last Month For Cocaine Possession
The New York Post reported on Friday that former Mets pitcher Dwight “Doc” Gooden was arrested in New Jersey last month for cocaine possession and driving under the influence....
Italian Track Cyclist Impaled By Chunk Of Wooden Track Mid-Race Expected To Make Full Recovery
During the scratch race at the Junior and U23 European Track Championships in Ghent on Friday, a group of riders crashed into one another, wreaking havoc not just on the leaderboard, but also on the track itself. The incident lifted a piece of the wooden track off the ground, which found its way int...
Chess Grandmaster Caught Using His Phone While On The Toilet During A Tournament
Latvian-Czech chess grandmaster Igors Rausis is reportedly under investigation after he was caught checking his phone while on the toilet in the middle of a tournament he was participating in. Rausis signed a declaration stating that the phone that investigators eventually found in a toilet stall wa...
Manchester United Travel Halfway Around The World And Still Can't Escape Liverpool Fans' Trolling
If you had to point at a single day that represents the absolute nadir of being a 21st-Century Manchester United fan, you could make a strong case that today, July 11, 2019, is that day. The team itself is a joke. Their best player desperately wants out. Both the Red Devils’ biggest rivals are in pe...
Looks Like Melvin Gordon Will Be The Next Star Running Back To Enter Holdout Purgatory
According to ESPN, Chargers running back Melvin Gordon does not plan to report to training camp for the Los Angeles Chargers without getting a new contract. Gordon, who is entering the last year of his rookie contract, has informed the team that he would like to be traded if a new deal can’t be work...
Here's Josh Norman Leaping Over A Bull In Pamplona
I guarantee you this is the best football-adjacent highlight you’ll see all day. This stretch of July is when thousands of brave/stupid people travel to Pamplona, Spain to put their bodies at risk, and Washington cornerback Josh Norman was there to face a foe much scarier than the Los Angeles Rams o...
CONCACAF's New World Cup Qualifying Format Is Bigger (And Dumber) Than Ever
CONCACAF’s convoluted World Cup qualifying format has always been tilted in favor the big boys at the expense of the teams in the confederation’s bottom tier, making it so the dozens of small nations had essentially no hope of ever playing in the World Cup. It’s understandable why CONCACAF sought to...
Report: Cubs Co-Owner Todd Ricketts Has Been Getting Away With Not Paying His Full Property Taxes
Thanks to an open records request filed by the Chicago Tribune, we now know that Todd Ricketts, finance chairman of the Republican National Committee and co-owner of the Chicago Cubs, has been getting a substantial tax break that he doesn’t deserve thanks to false documents filed by his attorney....
Report: President Salty Over Soccer Fans
The President of the United States went off on a Twitter rant about the media on Sunday evening. This isn’t news, because the President loves to yell into his computer box about things he saw on his TV box. What made this different, though, was that his target was Fox News....
The USMNT Lost The Gold Cup Final, And That's Probably OK
It’s never fun to lose to Mexico if you’re an American soccer fan. It’s doubly painful when it’s in the Gold Cup final, on American soil, as was the case Sunday night, when a 74th-minute golazo by Jonathan Dos Santos gave Mexico their eighth Gold Cup win—and fourth over the United States in a final—...