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The Dystopian Love Triangle <i>Z For Zachariah </i>Proves That Hell Is Other People
One of the best things about Z for Zachariah, the new drama starring Margot Robbie, Chiwetel Ejiofor, and Chris Pine, is that even after seeing the movie twice, I still have no idea how I feel about any of its three protagonists. That’s by design. Based on Robert C. O’Brien’s 1974 sci-fi novel, the ...
![Yankees Yell At Carlos Gomez For His Lack Of Prof--[DEAFENING FART NOISE]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/1402618490945115533.jpg)
Yankees Yell At Carlos Gomez For His Lack Of Prof--[DEAFENING FART NOISE]
The thing that sucks about being Carlos Gomez—a guy who’s earned a reputation as a “hot head,” or whatever it is grumpy baseball men are calling people—is that every little thing he does is going to be taken as a slight....

Martellus Bennett: "We Just Sucked. Everybody Sucked. Coaches, Players, Everybody."
Bears tight end Martellus Bennett has never had any compunction about publicly speaking his mind, and today’s beneficiary is Chicago magazine, which dropped a very entertaining profile of Bennett. In a wide-ranging interview conducted in May—when Bennett was holding out from OTA workouts in an attem...

Álvaro Negredo Scores Exquisite Chip Shot From A Ridiculous Angle
A well placed chip is closer to a perfectly arched three-pointer than a powerful slam dunk, and you won’t see a more audacious, protractor-guided lob than Álvaro Negredo’s here. Just the thought to shoot from there is almost as impressive as being able to hit the net....

Keeper Gets Red Card For Snatching Up, Throwing Out Idiot On The Field
You’d think the ref would have more respect for this fed up keeper who hunts down a pitch invader, grabs him by the back of the shirt, and marches him off the field like a put-upon teacher escorting an unruly student to the principal’s office, but instead of thanks, Mohamed Sokhra only received a re...

A Good Ballboy
Being a ballboy or ballgirl is a high-risk proposition. The only way they’re getting on TV is if they do something really cool or really embarrassing, and considering that most of them aren’t pro athletes, the embarrassing outcomes are the most likely. Such is not the case for this ballboy, though:...

Gosh, This Is Pretty
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Bayern Munich Concede Eight Seconds Into Match
Bayern Munich is one of the world’s top soccer clubs, but the record they broke today is one they’d rather forget as Hoffenheim’s Kevin Volland scored eight seconds into the match—the fastest in Bundesliga history. ...

Holy Shit, Marco Matias
This goal’s unreal. Sheffield Wednesday forward Marco Matias performs some kind of telekinesis to score a massive goal in today’s match against Leeds United in the Championship, and we’re confident that if a better highlight happens today it’ll have to be a real dick-shitter....

Kim Little Finishes Hat Trick By Making Mincemeat Of Houston Defense
Kim Little had all three goals in tonight’s Seattle win over Houston, and her final one in the 90th minute was a Messian work of art as the Scot sliced and diced a tired Dash defense....

The NFL's Policy On Punishing Weed Smokers Is Arbitrary And Retrograde
Congratulations to Oday Aboushi on his one-game suspension for violating the NFL’s substances of abuse policy. Police arrested the Jets offensive lineman in January and charged him with driving while suspended, careless driving, and possession of a controlled dangerous substance after they found “a ...

Clinton Portis, Lil B, And The Internet's Most Stolen Joke
Joke theft is a hot topic at the moment: with perpetrators like The Fat Jew finally facing repercussions for their comedy larceny and Twitter removing plagiarized tweets, it appears we’ve reached a day of reckoning for those who lack the wit to write their own jokes....

Former NFL QB Erik Kramer Wounded In Apparent Suicide Attempt
Ex-NFL quarterback Erik Kramer attempted to commit suicide by self-inflicted gunshot on Tuesday night, according to law enforcement and his ex-wife. Kramer, 50, survived the attempt and is currently hospitalized....

This Hideous Dog Has Me All Kinds Of Fucked Up. I Don't Feel Good.
I’m having a really fucking hard time with this dog, you guys....

Tom Brady Settlement Talks Are Going Poorly
It’s Tom Brady Day again in a Manhattan federal courthouse, and you should expect nothing. Don’t expect a settlement; talks between the NFL and Brady broke down yesterday. Don’t expect Brady himself; though the Patriots quarterback was in court last week, and took part in the mediation hearing befor...

The <i>Wet Hot American Summer</i> Prequel Loves Jokes, Hates Plots, And Is Perfect
It’s kind of crazy that Netflix ever green-lit Wet Hot American Summer: First Day Of Camp, to begin with. The eight-episode mini-series acts as a prequel to the 2001 film Wet Hot American Summer: Last Day Of Camp which, after making squat at the box office, ended up becoming a minor cult classic tha...

This Is What Memphis Depay Can Do
Soccer fans: meet Memphis. Memphis, likewise. This is why Manchester United paid all that money for the man heralded as the next Ronaldo. Well, this and United’s equalizer after Club Brugge scored first, saving a return of the old Lolunited tag....

Torrey Smith's Baby Is Still A Damn Good Sports Baby
This sports baby really is impossibly cute:...

NFL's Los Angeles Move Could Bring Divisional Realignment
If the Chargers and Raiders move to a shared stadium in Los Angeles—as currently appears to be the most likely outcome—the NFL will probably not want them continuing to share a division. That’s absolutely no problem, with both teams telling the league they’re willing to be moved if necessary....

Actually, Hurricane Katrina Was Not Super Cool
If you squint hard enough at this nasty number from last week, in which the Chicago Tribune’s Kristen McQueary wrote glowingly of the great civic good Hurricane Katrina visited upon the city of New Orleans a decade ago and of her fervent desire for Chicago to meet a similar fate, you can almost inte...