go Page 681 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

The Lone Wolf Goes To China
Stephon Marbury is now a point guard for the Brave Dragons of Shanxi, where writer Anthony Tao finds Ma-Bu-Li trying to preserve his star among the coal heaps of a modern Chinese city....

Mike Golic's Appearance On Dan Patrick's Radio Show Will Not Get Him Sent To Bristol Stockade
Yesterday morning, while on set in Miami, Dan Patrick half-jokingly invited ESPN's Mike Golic and Mike Greenberg to come on to his show. Greenberg declined, but Golic gleefully obliged. Technically, ESPN personalities are forbidden from appearing on competing shows. CHAOS....

Oregon Football Players Refuse To Lay Low For Awhile
Walk-on Matt Simms is charged with assaulting a man that he thought was responsible for stomping teammate Rob Beard last week. He was probably mistaken, but impulse control is not the Ducks' strong suit. [KVAL]...

January: <em>Fin.</em>
We produce a lot of posts every month. Most of them disappear quickly. Some of them don't. Here are the 10 most popular posts from January, ranked low to high...

Lefty's Wedges Are A Welcome Tempest In A Teapot
No Tiger? No one cares. That's the PGA's dilemma as the 2010 season gets underway, and luckily they've been able to whip up some manufactured controversy over the questionable legality of their second-biggest star's clubs. Well played, golf....

The Africa Cup Of Nations Will Not Runneth Over
Earlier this month, Togo withdrew from the Africa Cup of Nations when Angolan separatists attacked its team bus with machine guns, killing two delegation members. You would think the African Football Confederation would have sympathy. You would be wrong....

The Holy Child Will Have To Wait A Little Longer To Begin Speaking Only In Cliches
Brilliant beacon of blinding light Bryce Harper picked up his first collegiate hit in only his second at-bat. Too bad no-one is allowed to discuss it! I haven't seen lips this tight since, like, an hour ago. [The Nationals Enquirer]...

How Gross Do You Think It Gets Inside Those Green Suits?
"I still don't know what it symbolizes, but I like it!" says the delightfully dopey announcer about these two fine fellows who have taken up residence next to the penalty box at Canucks games. I feel the same way about this website....

Today In Hilarious Baseball Stat Acronym Humor
Ron Borges, ladies and germs, on UZR: "I thought those were the initials of a former Russian state only to learn it means Ultimate Zone Rating." [Boston Herald]...

Tiger's Harem Immortalized In Golf Ball Form
Well, this was inevitable. Just because Woods's sponsors dropped him, doesn't mean we can't still make a buck off him. For the Tiger Woods completist, or anyone with a terrible sense of humor, have we got the balls for you....

Media Reveals Its Giant Penis Envy Of Greg Oden
Since Greg Oden apologized to the world for the cellphone dong shots, many sports columnists have had to suffer through actually writing about it. There were plenty of cautious, you-have-to-be-careful-these-days, newsy approaches. Others, chose to focus on their own shortcomings....

Surprise Surprise, The Hall Of Fame Gets It Wrong
Despite his very public preference to go in as a Cub, Andre Dawson's HOF plaque will see him wearing an Expos cap. This is all Wade Boggs's fault. (Really.)...

What Lawyers Sound Like When They Talk About Greg Oden's Dong
Yesterday we received a friendly letter from BDA requesting we remove the teeny, tiny picture of Greg Oden's not-so-teeny-tiny penis. We did not oblige. Below, you'll find the charming back-and-forth between Gawker legal pit bull, Gaby Darbyshire, and Oden's representation....

Hockey Players Have Surprisingly Average, If Hairless Bodies
As a nice middle-of-the-road counterpoint to the flab of Terrence Cody and the idealized manhood of Greg Oden, here are some Blackhawks shirtless in a limo....

Greg Oden Bares His Soul After Baring His Pole
Oden held a press conference with Portland media, and did the right thing in owning up to the photos. Now that the news cycle has played out, maybe we can put Greg Oden's penis behind us....

Greg Oden Would Like To Apologize For His Appearance
"Those pictures were taken and sent over a year and a half ago. I've definitely grown since then." [95.5 The Game]...

Let's Not Form An Angry Mob Just Yet
Eugene police would like you to know that Jeremiah Masoli and Garrett Embry are not considered suspects at this time. So put away the torches for now. [KMTR]...

Just In Case There Was Any Doubt That It Was Greg Oden's Penis
The formal letters from Oden's management, BDA, have invaded the inboxes of websites across the country, including (surprise) ours. The letter is attached below. It is safe for work....

Athlete Dong: <em>Omnium-Gatherum</em> And Critical Analysis
Poor Greg Oden — his penis made him an unfortunate rising Google-trender. Of course, Oden isn't the first athlete to have his privates posted online. The Awl's Choire Sicha, Deadspin House Gay, provides commentary on sport's many peacocks....

Greg Oden's Gigantic Penis Is Also Healing Nicely
GOOD LORD. What the hell's gotten into Greg Oden? First he's spotted in a bright orange novelty T-shirt and now, he's one of the many too-proud athletes to snap a naked photo of himself in the bathroom. ABSOLUTELYNSFWORYOURMASCULINITYAFTERTHEJUMP....