go Page 693 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Hardline Twitter Memo Makes ESPN Employees Hilariously Paranoid
ESPN NBA writer Ric Bucher set the World Wide Leader's legion of writers, editors, and on-air personalities with raging Twitter habits into a collective shit-tizzy with one of his updates. Now, a revolution is afoot! Not really....

Minor Leaguer Convicted Of Assault After Basebrawl Gone Wrong
Remember that vicious minor league brawl that took an ugly turn when pitcher Julio Castillo chucked a 90-m.p.h. fastball at an innocent fan? It appears that people were not happy about that! And by people I mean judges and prosecutors....

If A Photo Of A Norwegian Black Metal Band Is On Deadspin, That Means Shit Is Seriously Messed Up
For real. This is the first snow day since I've been at Gawker, but the server problems are quite severe this time site-wide and it's making everyone's day miserable. So we're shutting it down for today....

NHL's Horrible CBA Comes Back To Bite Them In The Ass
After years of the NHL screwing fans, a few owners are now trying to screw the league. No one weeps for Gary Bettman, because turnabout is foul play....

Steve Bartman Not Allowed To Die Quietly
ESPN is producing a documentary on Steve Bartman, finally giving the world the narrative no one asked for. It's sure to rip out the hearts of Cubbies fans, the players don't want it, and I'm guessing Bartman's not thrilled either....

The Real Reason Michael Phelps Won't Meet With the Pope
It's not because he got high (as we all know, the Pope smokes dope). The reason famous fish-person Michael Phelps won't meet with the Nazi Pope is buried deep in his family history, as revealed on his Wikipedia page....

Why Your Stadium Sucks: U.S. Cellular Field
This is a weekly feature in which I (and maybe you, too, readers) detail the various reasons for hating your ballpark. This week: The Chicago White Sox's U.S. Cellular Field....

Where In The World Was Matthew Stafford?
We asked where these photos of Matthew Stafford's summer vacation were taken, and boy, did we get some answers. It's just too bad they all contradicted each other....

Odd Foreigner Chooses Fruity Little Tattoo Over Reebok Deal
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Golf Course Hunting Gives New Meaning To Notching A Birdie
A golf course in northern Indiana has a geese problem. Specifically, there's too many of them, honking and crapping everywhere. The city council's solution? Golfers with guns....

Starbury's Figurative Train Wreck Becomes A Literal Car Crash
We knew they shouldn't have let him outside. At the 1:45 mark, Stephon's car appears to jump the curb, or maybe run over an old lady. But "don't worry about it. It ain't nothin' but the Devil." [H/T reader Brian]...

Golfer Wins First LPGA Event, Honor Of Being Molested By Frenchmen
Congratulations to Evian Masters winner Ai Miyazato, whose reward is this unsettling photographic commentary on the French libido, golf's patriarchy, modern Orientalism and the staggering inability of women's golf to devise a trophy that doesn't seem vaguely cocklike....

This Is Probably Just A Coincidence....
Why would this blind item show up today of all days? "Which half-jock couple isn't telling the truth about their breakup? .... She wound up with an STD that he picked up from one of his pickups. [BlindGossip, via Gawker]...

Michael Vick Is Back In Business (Sorta)
NFL.com just posted this cryptic statement: "The NFL has reinstated Michael Vick on a conditional basis. The former Falcons QB will be considered for full reinstatement and to play in regular-season games by Week 6." Um. Okay?...

Canadian Open Features Nothing But Holes-In-One
Here is Leif Olson making both the greatest golf shot ever and the greatest billiards shot ever at the same time. Of course, when three others have already aced the same hole, you gotta step it up a notch....

Attendance Should Be A Record High For This Giveaway
The Royals need a worthwhile promotion to draw fans in August. Figurines are too conventional. There must be something else. Hmm. Tough one. How 'bout urine?...

And Now For A Minute Of Actual Sports
Roy Halladay is not a member of the Phillies ... yet. The Toronto Blue Jays' demands of executive bathroom privileges proved too steep for the Philadelphia bigwigs....

I Know Steve Bartman And This Man Is No Steve Bartman
See this fan? He almost grabbed the ball that DeWayne Wise caught to save Mark Buehrle's perfect game. He should feel, really, really, really bad. [Washington Times]...

You Are Sort Of There For Buehrle's Perfect Game
An unemployed blogger provides an on-the-scene report from Mark Buehrle's perfect game. Well, as on-the-scene as you can get from the top of the bleachers. [Tremendous Upside Potential]...

Phil Mickelson Is Just Looking To Maintain His Physique
Hefty Lefty is in talks to purchase 105 Waffle House restaurants. I realize "restaurant" is a generous choice of words, but the All-Star Special breakfast is a dearer prize than the Green Jacket. [Bloomberg]...