gold Page 94 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
This Kid Was Promptly Beaten Up By Players From Eight Different Countries
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....
Violent Bike Collision Has Quick, Polite Resolution
A guy riding his bike with a shoulder-mounted camera hits an old man. Words are exchanged. Disputation seems inevitable. Then both graciously agree on their mutual culpability and move on. Moral: Old people need to watch where the fuck they're going....
Cal Second-String Wide Receiver Is Third-Rate Rapper
For senior Alex "Loggy" Lagemann, the upcoming football season couldn't have come at a worse time: the addition of practices, study halls, and games to his schedule will only take valuable time away from his true passion: making awful, awful rap music....
Sen. Jim Bunning, R-Pluto, Thinks Stephen Strasburg Is A Wuss
Bunning, onetime pitcher and current obstreperous shitbag, waggled his cane yesterday at young Strasburg: "Five-hundred twenty starts, I never refused the ball. What a joke!" Then he clutched his shoulder and cried, "My arm!" That was either sarcasm or thrombosis. [Politico, via]...
Armed Robbery Will Turn Stephen Jackson Into The NBA's Charles Bronson, Bobcats Beat Writer Thinks
The wife of Bobcats forward Stephen Jackson was held at gunpoint by home invaders, locked in a bathroom, and robbed in the couple's Charlotte home Wednesday. Trauma aside, she's fine. But don't tell that to Rick Bonnell of the Charlotte Observer....
Sportswriter Publicly Quits, Salts The Earth In His Wake
The Miami Herald's FIU beat writer figured out that his paper and his city (to say nothing of the world) care a hell of a lot more about The U than they do FIU. His scathing letter of resignation pulled no punches....
Last Night's Winner: Jeremy Lin, NBA Player
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like Jeremy Lin, the undrafted Taiwanese-American Harvard guy who signed a two-year, partially guaranteed contract with the Warriors and immediately became the NBA's most popular 12th man....
Producer Of Ridiculous Movies Buys Golden State Warriors
Peter Guber, Tinseltown bigshot and producer of Vision Quest and Flashdance, is part of the ownership group that has bid a record $450 million for the Warriors. He's a maniac and he's spending like he's never spent before. [Deadline]...
Golden Tate's Donut Crimes Becomes Obvious Ad Opportunity
As (sorta) predicted, Top Pot Doughnuts has turned a NFL's player's sugar addiction—and a fortuitous breaking and entering—into marketing gold. [Photo submitted by Seattle reader Jon.]...
Golden Tate's Dramatic 911 Donut Call: "They're Drunk And Being Retarded"
Listen in as an exasperated donut maker asks police to save her from two buffoons who stole her donuts and her keys. Also: an NFL wideout with "average" build who is "maybe 5'9"? Maybe he needs more than donuts....
Golden Tate Breaks Into Donut Shop Due To Maple Bar Addiction
Police were called to Top Pot Doughnuts in Bellevue, Washington, at 3:00 a.m. on Saturday after two men were found entering the store after hours. Turns out new Seahawk Golden Tate just had a case of the munchies....
Today In "Bryce Harper Is A No-Good Hothead"
Bryce Harper is good at baseball and he knows it. He has a reputation as a bit of a whippersnapper, though, and after getting ejected last night for making a gesture at an ump, that rep will continue to grow....
Golden Tate Sings Taylor Swift
When you're asked to croon a few lines from your favorite Taylor Swift song, the only correct answer is "I don't know any." Golden Tate does not give the correct answer....
Last Night's Winner: The Rest Of The NFC North
In sports, everyone is a winner-some people just win better than others. Like Tarvaris Jackson's chances of starting, which look pretty bright since Brett Favre has hitched his latest comeback to the hopes of a long-shot college baseball team....
Lesbian Grim Reaper Also Impressed By Kevin Durant's Performance
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day...
<em>Newsday</em> Sports Section Adopts Strict Policy Of Blowing Sunshine Up Your Ass
Newsday, a collection of tire ads that old people leave lying around diners in Farmingdale, is cracking down on any use of sarcasm or name-calling or "negative characterization" in its corpse of a sports section. To which I say: Brilliant idea, assholes!...
Color Me Fucking Shocked: Dick Vitale Loves Tim Tebow
You had to know Vitale would have a chubby for Tebow, the embodiment of heart. It was inevitable. The college basketball sportscaster chimes in today with an unbearable column about why Tebow should be taken high in the draft....
Jim Nantz, You Suck! Goddammit!
Nantz pronounces himself appalled at Tiger's naughty language. "How about the father and son who are standing right there by the tee? How about the hundreds of people who are around that tee who hear that?" How about you fuck yourself? [Chron.com]...
A Reminder: When You Email Deadspin, You Are Contributing To Deadspin
Unless you specify that your email is off the record anything that comes into any author or the tips line is fair game. So be mindful of that every time you send us something. For example......
Ehhhh...Fuck Off, Dale Hansen
"That story we had earlier tonight about Cowboys owner Jerry Jones, if that's what it is (and our news director thinks it is), is yet another example of the decline of journalism as we once knew it." [WFAA]...