hands Page 3 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

PR Guy Gets A Little Handsy With TV Reporter
Click to view All Dan Noyes wanted to do was interview a woman about a hospital gift fund. He was rudely intercepted by the hospital's very touchy-feely communications director. Unstoppable force, immovable object, etc. Video after the jump. [SFGate, video via Today's Big Thing]...

And Here's A Guy Getting A Handy At A Hockey Game
Not sure who deserves more props - the BU hockey fan receiving some surreptitious manual love, or the private dick who decided to record it. We'll be handing out bonus points for identifying the parties involved....

Queering In The Press Box
Michael Silver: "By midway through the third quarter ... I was ready to take the Atlanta Falcons quarterback up to Gavin Newsom's box on the west side of the stadium and ask the San Francisco mayor to marry us." [Yahoo!]...

The Utterance Of This Word Should Be Punishable By Death
Let's get one thing straight: I'm not going to break any new ground here. I'm not going to teach you anything new about baseball. I'm not going to cause you to reassess how you think about sports journalism....

Jay Mariotti Thinks USC’s Freshman QB Is Totally Cute
It's not uncommon for sportswriters to have man-crushes on athletes, but when you lead with this Freudian slip, you're bound to raise some eyebrows: "The afternoon sun was orgasmic. … Yet nothing was more radiant than Matt Barkley's smile."...

Smokin' Jay: Cutler Sure Does Clean Up Nicely
Judging by this month's Michigan Avenue Magazine, the new Bears quarterback wants to mount a serious challenge to Matt Ryan as the best-looking ball-slinger in the NFL. What else is he saying with these hot new looks?...

Matt Ryan Is A Handsome Man, Science Proves
The screeching teenyboppers at the Wall Street Journal bring word that Matt Ryan is the most knee-meltingly dreamy quarterback in the NFL. It's true because science says so. And believe it or not, this actually sort of matters....

Pregame Handshake Coming To College Football
Oh good, this'll solve all the problems with recruiting violations, BCS absurdities, jumping early to the pros, coaches' secret ballots, "gifts" from recruiters, grade inflation, ridiculous bowl sponsorships, competitive imbalance, players running afoul of the law, overpaid coaches... [USA Today]...

There Are So Many Ways To Make Your Leg Turn Purple
A good portion of Americans join softball leagues this time of the year. Many do it for the social aspect alone, which leaves many teams stockpiled with players who are ridiculously awful....

How LeBron Could Have Avoided Handshakegate Without Shaking Hands
Sports columnists must love LeBron James. Not only does he provide fanciful fodder during the regular season and permit them to wax rhapsodic as witnesses during the playoffs, but even when his season is done, he gives them the material they need for their next-day opinions....

Sasha Cohen Is Here To Save America's Gold
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap...

This Is How Skip Bayless Keeps His Mouth In Shape
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap...

Johan Santana Has A Very Good Memory
Sorry to get all "Meet the Mets" on you today, but I noticed something bizarre during today's pregame that must be discussed—Johan Santana apparently has an individual handshake ritual for every player on his team....

Loyal Fandom, Taunting Or Performance Art?
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap....

Revisiting Jeff Reed's Paper Towel Freakout: An Investigative Report
You're probably thinking to yourself, "Hey, did they ever fix the towel dispenser that Jeff Reed broke?" That or you were thinking of pie. Quite often it's pie....

Wacky Waving Inflatable Arm Flailing Tube Man
The Visitor's Locker Room compares Green to a legendary infomercial pitchman, but I've always enjoyed this guy... ...

The Tao Of Fred Ex
For those of you saw the sleazy, magazine-licking photos of George Clooney's girlfriend Sarah Larson circulating around the web over the last few days, you may have noticed this picture of former Eagles wideout (and substitute teacher) Freddie Mitchell randomly popping up.in the photo book from that...

Eli: Cover Boy?
For its top selling Madden NFL franchise, Electronic Arts Tiburon typically selects an electrifying player who epitomizes the furious intensity of NFL action, while appealing to average young football fan....

GSTF Book Tour Stop: Tempe, Arizona
The first step of the book tour kicked off last night at the Changing Hands Bookstore in Phoenix, and we had a grand time with Roger Director, who has considerably more energy than we do....

Favre Mad Libs > Brady Slash Fiction
Have you ever wanted to write a story about Brett Favre, but you just couldn't find the right words to express your raging hard-on for the guy? Well worry no more, because the Gray Lady's younger, sluttier e-counterpoint has written the perfect formula....