heat Page 51 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Insane Mountain Bike Announcing Theater: "How Does Danny Hart Sit Down With Balls That Big?!" Edition
Some people really like competitive mountain biking. Some people watch competitive mountain biking on television. Some die-hards even go and watch it in person. The two whack jobs doing play-by-play, or whatever you call it in mountain biking, for this particular event, however, do all of the abov...

What It Sounds Like To Sit Next To The World's Most Annoying Miami Heat Fan
It was Dec. 27, and Jason Feifer was pumped for the Miami Heat home season opener. Feifer and his dad had scored tickets to see the Heat take on the Boston Celtics. As the Feifers settled into their seats, they paid little attention to the petite woman next to them. The woman was by herself, wearing...

LeBron James Gets Engaged, Preemptively Breaks His New Year's Resolution To Stop Being So Tacky
LeBron proposed to his long-time girlfriend, Savannah Brinson, at a joint New Year's Eve and King James birthday celebration last night. And she said yes! How romantic....

NBA Officials Create A Twitter Account Just To Explain Why Dwyane Wade Didn't Travel Last Night
Just about an hour ago, a Twitter handle @NBAOfficials went live, with a single Tweet: an explanation of why Dwyane Wade's gamewinning jump-stop-pivot jumper with 2.9 seconds left was right not to be whistled for a travel. The Tweet was a response to Hardwood Paroxysm's Rob Mahoney and ESPN's Tom ...

A Gestural Analysis Of The Miami Heat's Intro Video (In Which Everyone Looks Like A French Sailor)
The over-produced NBA team introduction video is an unfortunate but often hilarious fact of life now, and we may as well accept its extravagance and pyrotechnics as such. But not every team is the Miami Heat, and not every team's introduction video calls to mind the hip-hop super-group music video...

ShortCenter: Jalen Rose Gets Emphatic About the Heat, Then Asks You Out
What is ESPN prattling on about right now? We condense your morning SportsCenter to its essence....

Get To Know Norris Cole (That Guy Playing Point Guard For The Heat)
The NBA season started on Sunday, and the whole thing has been predictably disorienting. Vince Carter is now fat and on the Mavs bench? Who knew?...

Even Santa Claus, Drink In Hand, Heckled LeBron James On Christmas Day
Hey, he had worked his ass off the night before, and he was really looking forward to going to the Mavs' opener, what with it being a Finals rematch and all. Can you blame him for wanting to clean up his beard, kick back with a gin and tonic, and let off a little steam? [That NBA Lottery Pick]...

LeBron James Wouldn't Let Walter Iooss Jr., Who Was Photographing Him For Nike, Speak Directly To Him
If you get a chance to pick up last week's Sports Illustrated issue without gagging at the cover, it's worth flipping through to Walter Iooss Jr.'s career retrospective. The photographer has been shooting athletes and swimsuit models for SI for 50 years, and it turns out that he's got as many wonder...

Shane Battier Announces He's Joining The Heat Via Jimmy Buffett Quote
If you were looking for a fresh reason to hate on the Miami Heat this year, Shane Battier's come through for you. The Grizzlies forward announced on Twitter this morning that he's joining the Heat. Somehow, a Jimmy Buffett reference made it into the mix. That alone almost makes this more damning tha...

Former Dolphin Says Nick Saban Calmly Stepped Over Convulsing Teammate In '05
We'll make this one brief, because if it is true, than it is stale by about six years—but we do jump at any opportunity to point out instances in which Nick Saban might have behaved like a dick, and this anecdote certainly qualifies....

LeBron Misses Two Jumpers, Feels Bad, Dunks On A Helpless Child Instead
Your morning roundup for Nov. 17, the day we learned there are children in China who love school, a lot. Video courtesy Hoops Fix, via Cosby Sweaters. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....

In New Book, Shaq Explains How Kobe's Sexual Assault Charges Destroyed The Lakers
Shaq Uncut: My Story, the Diesel's new autobiography written with noted Around the Horn personage Jackie MacMullan, comes out November 15 and it dropped on our desk today. There's some juicy stuff in there, most obviously about the beef between Shaq and Kobe. We had always known that the feud took a...

LeBron's Big Bang: Flywire Me To The Stars
This is a new regular feature in which we'll take a look at recent sneaker releases....

There Were Two Buzzer-Beaters In The NHL Last Night
Ryan McDonagh's putback after a Dan Girardi prayer caromed behind the net gave the Rangers a 3-2 win in overtime. Dany Heatley's bad-angle flick off of Nikolai Khabibulin's chest at the end of regulation salvaged a point for Minnesota, and eventually a second one with a shootout win. Both goals we...

In Case You Were Interested In A Book That Calls LeBron James A Whore
Esquire has the first excerpt from Scott Raab's The Whore of Akron, on sale Nov. 15. We'll have more later in the week. For now: "Lord. This is where LeBron James wants to play basketball, in front of sun-dried cretins who must be bribed to act as if they care about the game and the team. ... For as...

Pete Carroll Pleads With LeBron, Because Apparently The Seahawks Need His Help To Underachieve
Your morning roundup for Oct. 13, the day we learned just how dangerous some sex toys can be. Photo via @PeteCarroll. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....

One Armand De Brignac Nebuchadnezzar For Only $100,000! An Unscientific Analysis Of The Zac-Efron-And-Heather-Graham-Inspired Chicago Bar Bill
People are making a big deal out of the epic bar tab this week (full version here), but I don't see why. Far as I can tell, it was just another Tuesday night in the Board Room, Chicago's epicenter of cool. Another Tuesday night with the top people in the Midwest. Have you been to the Board Room? It'...

LeBron Is Apparently Spending The Lockout Teaching His High School How To Lose Football Games In The Fourth Quarter
Your morning roundup for Oct. 5, the day we were propositioned via breakfast burrito. Photo of LeBron in pads back at school courtesy Fox8. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....

The C-Roll's Happy Ending: A Back-Row Handjob At A Marlins Game (NSFW)
The finale of the C-Roll brings us, presumably, to what we now call Sun Life Stadium, where young love once possibly blossomed in the back row of some forgotten section—the details are now lost to history. There's no game audio attached to this one, so there's no way to determine when it was shot,...