hi Page 787 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

The Time Dave McKenna Accidentally Called 911 On A Guy Just Looking For His Craigslist Date
Our beloved colleague Dave McKenna tells good stories. He’s done a lot of cool shit, met many weird people in weird ways, and had his run-ins with the law. And after selfishly squirreling all his stories away in Slack and our brains for years, we’ve realized we have a societal obligation to share. ...

This Sixers Have To Foul In This Situation
The Celtics were probably going to win Game 2 no matter what happened in the last 30 seconds. They’d already come back from a 22-point deficit and were ahead by three with half a minute to play. But the Sixers did something to lessen their already-small chances of winning late last night: They didn’...

Sidney Crosby Makes Everyone Better
Here’s a stat—a quirk?—that has very little to do with anything else in this blog but is too amazing not to lead with: In this series, Sidney Crosby has been on the ice for all 10 of Pittsburgh’s goals....

The Sixers Blew It
With a little more than five minutes remaining in the first half tonight, Robert Covington drained a three, stretching the 76ers’ lead over the Celtics to 21 points. Philadelphia was in control here, with no signs of loosening their grip. And then they sent all of that to hell. Over the next quarter...

Rowdy Laxbros Fight As Only 30 Dudes Named Braden Can
Oh dear. The Herefords and the Darbys are brawling again. Do ask the butler to close the shutters, will you?...

Exasperated Lacrosse Coach Emails Parents: "Most Of Our Team Focuses On The Fortnight Video Game Instead"
Find a kid with a tablet or computer these days, and chances are they’re watching or playing Fortnite. The online video game in which players build stairs and walls and then shoot each other has spread like a virus, and it’s derailed at least one boys lacrosse team, to the point where the coach sen...

Ichiro Will Retire, Or At Least Not Play Any More Baseball This Season
Ichiro, the true hit king, has played his final major-league game—probably....

James Paxton Made 16 Strikeouts Look Easy
The early part of the MLB season has seen strikeout and home run rates continue to rise, and the game is trending towards one that is positively overstuffed with Ks and dingers. A decent theory of why this is happening isn’t too hard to tease out: Batters are consciously taking big swings, which are...

Mystery High School Football Field Pooper Turns Out To Be A School Superintendent
One New Jersey township was having a bit a poop problem recently. Someone was repeatedly taking a dump at the football field and track complex at Holmdel High School. The police said it was happening “on a daily basis.”...

There's Always Been Blood On UNC's Confederate Statue<em></em>
“I smeared my blood and red ink on the statue because the statue was lacking proper historical context. This statue, Silent Sam, was built on white supremacy. It was built by white supremacists. It was built by people who believed that Black people were inferior and wanted to intimidate them. So the...

The RGIII™ Brand Is Dead, And Here's The Death Certificate
Want to see something really sad? Look at what’s become of Robert Griffin III’s stable of trademarks:...

Michigan State Says No NCAA Rules Were Violated When Larry Nassar Sexually Abused Student Athletes
Michigan State told the NCAA in a Wednesday letter that there were “no NCAA rules violations” in the case of Larry Nassar, the MSU and USA Gymnastics team doctor accused of sexually abusing at least 25 MSU student athletes and scores of other young women over decades....

Report: Donald Trump Spent Quality Time Last Week Talking Football With Bill Belichick
In 1993, Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen found time between Full House episodes to record an album called I Am the Cute One. Songs include “I Am a Kid,” “I Love to Scream,” and “No One Tells the President What to Do.” The last of those is a celebration of the truth of its title—the president can do whate...

Former Washington DT A.J. Francis Rips Team On Instagram After Signing With Giants: "Your Logo Is Racist"
Defensive tackle A.J. Francis signed with the New York Giants today after being released by his former team, Washington, on Monday. He celebrated the move with an Instagram post that’s way more good riddance than goodbye. ...

NHL Suspends Tom Wilson Three Games For Jaw-Breaking Hit
Less than 24 hours before Game 4 of the Capitals and Penguins’ second-round series—which Washington leads 2-1—the NHL announced that it has suspended Capitals enforcer Tom Wilson three games for his hit on Penguins forward Zach Aston-Reese in Game 3, which broke the Pittsburgh player’s jaw and gave ...

Ethiopian Soccer Coach Fired For Socking A Ref In The Face
Video replay in soccer sucks, but goal line technology is great. The biggest advocate for the introduction of this tech in Ethiopian soccer is probably the referee of this weekend’s Defence Force vs. Welwalo Adigrat match, since it probably would’ve saved him from getting fed this fist sandwich:...

Jordan Hicks Threw The Season's Two Fastest Pitches
Reliever Jordan Hicks, who plays for some crummy team, threw record-setting gas Tuesday night against White Sox shortstop Tim Anderson. Five of the six pitches in that plate appearance were above 101 mph, and the pitch at the top of this post came in at 102.0 mph, the fastest this season. Anderson c...

Report: Washington Cheerleaders Were Told To Serve As Escorts For Rich Sponsors On Unsavory Costa Rica Trip
Of the many queasy revelations in Juliet Macur’s story in the New York Times today about the Washington Redskins’ sketchy-unto-sleazy treatment of its cheerleaders, the most mind-boggling concerns a trip to Costa Rica in 2013. Five cheerleaders told Macur that the team had them serve as escorts for ...

The Capitals-Penguins Blood Feud Now Maybe Has Some Spit In It
Familiarity breeds contempt, yes, but also, contempt breeds contempt. The Capitals and Penguins would dislike each other even if they didn’t meet four times a season and then again seemingly every spring, but the prolificity of the rivalry gives the bad blood the time and exposure it needs to ripen ...

MSU Knew Of Larry Nassar's Boss's "Inappropriate Remarks" Back In 2015
While disgraced former Michigan State and USA Gymnastics doctor Larry Nassar is serving prison time for what will likely be the rest of his life after sexually abusing hundreds of young girls and women, his former boss at MSU, William Strampel, is currently facing criminal sexual conduct charges of...