horror - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Don't Cook Chicken In A Fucking Dishwasher
Earlier today, while waiting on my porch for some delivery guys to turn up, I checked in on what was happening in Deadspin’s work chat—my job requires me to surveil the staffs of the various Gizmodo Media Group sites to make sure they’re diligently working for the betterment of our corporate overlor...
Don't Ever Be This Guy
That’s ABC News chief national correspondent and World News Tonight anchor Tom Llamas up there, live from flood-devastated Houston, with what I’m pretty sure is the worst tweet in history. Holy fucking shit, man. ...
Welcome To Meat Sack, A Guide To Sports-Related Body Horror
The ecosystem of the human body does not want for complexity, nor do the myriad of idiot things we inflict upon it. This is perhaps nowhere more apparent than in the world of sports, where athletes willingly submit their bodies, like monks to their vows, in pursuit of Larry having a nice, drunken ni...
Tell Us About Your Extreme Teenage Gluttony
When I was an angular teen with visible ribs and freakish teen metabolism, and not a rotund middle-aged slob, my brother and I used to walk across the street from our high school to McDonald’s in the short interval between the end of the school day and the start of football practice. I’d get two Big...
Let's Talk About All The Amazing Little Details In <i>Get Out</i>
I saw Get Out yesterday afternoon, and then I spent the next eight hours or so thinking and talking about Get Out. The only review of the movie I will offer is this: Go see this goddamn movie as soon as possible, whether or not you like horror flicks. I don’t really want to spend any time reviewing ...
Ways To Die That Are More Awful Than Dissolving In A Scalding Acid Bath, Ranked
A tourist who fancied a bath in one of Yellowstone National Park’s many geothermal pools slipped while attempting to gauge the temperature of the broth, fell into what turned out to be a deadly near-boiling acid bath, and dissolved. That is about the most metal thing I can imagine, but also he is ex...
Send Us Your College Roommate Horror Stories
At the risk of doomsaying like some David Brooksian “kids these days” reactionary luddite, it must be said: College now seems crueler than ever before....
Evil Person Ruins Lionel Messi's Career In Video Game
One of the chief appeals of the much-beloved video game series Football Manager is seeing how this meticulously-researched game that goes to absurd lengths for realism forecasts the future, and how you, by way of your invented manager avatar, can affect that future. Usually, gamers accomplish this t...
Please Enjoy This Supremely Fucked-Up First Pitch
America hasn’t won a single World Baseball Classic, and we’re similarly lagging behind the rest of the world in first pitch nightmares. Where is the presidential candidate who will deliver creepy ghost children to America’s ballparks?...
Here's What Happened When We Used Snapchat's Face Swap Filter On An Episode Of <i>PTI</i>
Because we are sick in the head, we were curious what would happen if we took today’s episode of Pardon the Interruption and ran it through Snapchat’s face swap filter. The results are, as you might expect, horrifying....
Norwegian Fifth Division Match Features Two-Footed Horror Tackle
The worst things about this video are, in order:...
Nigel de Jong Brought His Horror Tackles With Him To MLS
Nigel de Jong—who you might remember from the time he karate kicked Xabi Alonso in the chest during the World Cup Finals, or the time he broke Stuart Holden’s leg in a friendly, or the time he fractured Hatem Ben Arfa’s tibia and fibula, or all the other times he made violent tackles—now plies his t...