horror Page 2 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
ESPN Photoshopped Lionel Messi's Head Onto Sergio Agüero's Body, And It Looks Dumb As Hell
ESPN FC has a horrifying article up the site’s front page headlined “Why Messi could join Man City.” Now, the post isn’t horrifying for its content—I didn’t read it as I have no interest in Messi fanfiction—but rather because of this disturbing Photoshop job that accompanies it:...
Counterpoint: Oh God, I Think I'm Going To Be Sick
Here, as best I can approximate it in text, is the sound I made when I saw the above photo for the first time: Whuuhhuuhuhhhhhhuulckk. It was the sound of the sudden fear that I might puke. If the internet contains a more distressing photograph than that one, I will just have to take your word for i...
<i>The Final Girls </i>Is The Nadir Of Meta-Horror, Which Is The Nadir Of Real Horror
If you’re a horror fan, you’ve noticed that every few months, there’s a new entry in the genre that’s explicitly marketed to non-fans, with blogs and critics hyping “your new favorite horror film” and granting best-since-whatever status to a certain kind of movie. Think titles like Tucker & Dale vs....
I Watched B-Movie TV For 24 Hours Straight And Didn't Survive
There comes a point in any 24-hour movie marathon when you’re bleary-eyed, you reek of jet-black coffee and unnatural foodstuffs, and you’re dreaming of nothing more than a hot shower and the soft embrace of a down comforter. You’re thinking to yourself, “Why the hell did I do this?” And you have no...
A Rest Stop Stalker, And More Of Your Real-Life Horror And Ghost Stories
On Friday, we asked you to share your real-life ghost stories, and I semi-regret it. Some of your stories are legitimately freaky! Brace yourself for readers’ scariest real-life ghost stories. ...
<i>American Horror Story: Hotel</i> Will Make You Wanna Vom!
Welp, that was gross! If last night’s premiere of American Horror Story: Hotel told us anything about the season to come, it’s that the five-season-old FX show is now even less for the queasy than usual. Guts and gore have always been a common feature, and Lady Gaga, who looms over this new installm...
<i>Goodnight Mommy </i>Is Effortlessly Disturbing
Goodnight Mommy is uneven, and in this case that’s a good thing. The movie is a long stretch of quiet, bucolic landscapes and indoor-voice family squabbles, punctuated by a hard left turn into ultraviolence. The transition from psychological to physical horror is so abrupt, the shock of its mere exi...
“Never Fight People Bigger Than You”: Your School Fight Horror Stories
I went to Spanish Camp when I was a kid (shut up), and there was this one kid named Dave who was always a dick to me. I spent pretty much every waking moment ruminating on how much I hated Dave, until one day when I couldn’t take it anymore, and I walked up behind Dave and sucker-punched him. Total ...
“Then They Lit A Roman Candle”: Your Best Fireworks Horror Stories
Fireworks! So loud! So destructive! So shabbily made! Why, they’re the perfect embodiment of America itself! No wonder we blow them up real good every 4th of July....
Don't Coat Your Innards With Space Oil To Conserve Ketchup
You know how there's always a little bit of ketchup that you never quite get out of the bottle? It coats the inside; even if you do the thing where you stand the bottle on its head for 24 hours to let it all ooze down close to the nozzle, some of it never comes out, and goes in the trash....
Now There's A Ranch-Dressing Restaurant, So Let's Walk Into The Ocean
Listen. I say the following with a pristine record of support for unhealthful dairy-based coating glops—both as a genre of foodstuffs and in most specific instances—as well as with the firm backing of all available science: Ranch dressing is bad. Bad dressing....
These Are Your Worst High School Reunion Horror Stories
We asked, and you delivered. Here are a few of your worst high school reunion stories: ...
Please Submit Your Worst High School Reunion Horror Stories
This holiday week, many of you will spend your hard-earned free time going back home and awkwardly mingling with people you haven't seen since high school, and probably didn't even want to hang out with back then. It will be—if you're lucky—boozy and flirty and catastrophic. You know you've got stor...
FC Zurich Initiates Legal Proceedings Over Horror Tackle
If you're the squeamish sort, I highly suggest you do not watch the above video. It shows a barbaric tackle from this weekend's Swiss Super League action, involving FC Arau's Sandro Wieser and FC Zurich's Gilles Yapi Yalo. Wieser launches his cleat into Yapi Yalo's knee, causing "torn anterior and...
Watch These Non-Ohioans Try To Eat Gross-Ass Cincinnati Chili
Here's twelve non-Ohioans (West-Coasters, specifically) trying to choke down some signature Ohio foods. There's a pretty broad selection of foods, here—Glier's goetta and so forth—but the centerpiece is the Skyline 3-way; they start eating it around 2:10 in the video. Spoiler alert: They think i...
![Redditor Asks How Much Pumpkin To Put In His Cincinnati Chi--[Gunshot]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/dka0ezc5hswz0gwx5bjw.png)
Redditor Asks How Much Pumpkin To Put In His Cincinnati Chi--[Gunshot]
Behold, the worst of all the things: a Redditor putting pumpkin in his diarrhea sludge! ...
Wendy's Pulled Pork Cheese Fries Are The Saddest Meal
This is not really a review of the Wendy's Pulled Pork Cheese Fries; in order for it to function as a review, I would have to go to a Wendy's location and say, aloud, to a Wendy's employee, "I will have the Pulled Pork Cheese Fries," and I can't even rehearse that without my hands literally punching...
This Church Song-And-Dance Is The Most Excruciating Thing I've Ever Seen
Oh God. Ohhhhh God. I hurt all over. I hurt all over and I want to die....
Hey Look, It's The Sad Cocktail Grenades You Always Wanted
Evidently these have been around for a while, but they're new to me. BuzzBallz: Regret In a Can. BuzzBallz: Liquid Cold-Sore. BuzzBallz: Convex Around the Sides, Like Your Abdomen When Fluid Accumulates In Your Peritoneal Cavity as a Result of the Liver Cirrhosis You Get From Living the Kind of L...
McDonald's Is Poisoning iPhone-Line Denizens With Food From McDonald's
Man, Apple customers get all the free shit lately. ...