houston Page 78 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Your Voting Is Bad And You Should Feel Bad
The early All-Star balloting numbers are in, and it looks like another year of the usual suspects: Kobe, LeBron, D-Wade, T-Mac...*record scratch*...

The Perfect Gift For The Kris Brown Fan In Your Life
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Last Night's Winner: Referee Jerome Boger
In sports, everyone is a winner-some people just win better than others. Like NFL referee Jerome Boger, who must have had something riding on last night's game. Nobody likes Vince Young that much....

Apparently, Paul Brown Stadium Is Also A Very Large Public Urinal
Here's a fun fact: Texans' right guard Chris White pissed his pants against the Bengals on Sunday because he was "uncomfortable," but didn't want to come off the field. Don't worry. Jeff Reed's got his back. [Chronicle; Photo]...

Raiders-Texans Game Is An Excellent Place To Take A Nap
A bored Raiders fan gets sleepy at Reliant Stadium and Houstonians take surprisingly good care of him. If this had happened at the Coliseum his homemade face tattoos would still be healing. [Photo via Texans Bull Pen, via FanHouse]...

Shawn Chacon Even Worse At Gambling Than He Was At Pitching
Las Vegas authorities have issued an arrest warrant for former Astro Shawn Chacon, after he allegedly passed $150,000 worth of bad checks at Caesar's Palace. Even worse, he always tries to split face cards. [Las Vegas Sun]...

Houston Astros Fire Their "Manager"
With 13 games to go in their dismal season, the Astros—an alleged "base ball" team from Houston—have fired manager Cecil Cooper. In other news, Cecil Cooper was apparently managing the Astros this season! [Houston Chronicle]...

Aaron Boone Plays Baseball, Heart Doesn't Explode
The guy had open heart surgery in March, but was in the lineup for the Astros yesterday. Oh-for-3, but he did make a nifty play in the field. And his aorta is still intact, so that's a plus. [MLB.com]...

Everything's Bigger In Texas, Except The Beers
It's a dark day for fans of the Houston Texans; you're now getting your beer in smaller cups, because you pansies have proven you can't hold your alcohol....

Jeremy Shockey Doesn't Play Well With Others
The Saints and Texans, bitter rivals from centuries past, got into a little intersquad donnybrook yesterday and America's second-most beloved tight-end was somewhere in the middle of it. Shocking, right? (Get it? 'Cause that's his name.)...

Rangers Welcome Ivan Rodriguez Back Into Their Pudgy Arms
Houston puts the Rangers' old catcher on a bus to Arlington, receive two prospects in return, and Texas fans get a daily reminder that old age will someday leave them a broken shell of their former selves. [Dallas Morning News]...

T-Pain (and Auto-Tune) Makes Dolphins Fight Song Slightly Less Terrible
Miami has long relied on terrible music to rally their football team, but this is the 21st Century, so they hired T-Pain to hip-hopify their fight song by 20% or so. The kids love this stuff....

Why Your Team Sucks: Houston Texans
Some people are fans of the Houston Texans. But many, many more people are NOT fans of the Houston Texans. This 2009 Deadspin NFL team preview is for those in the latter group....

Oddly Enough, Married Athletes Are Still Foolin' Around
And here I thought Steve McNair's death would eradicate unfaithfulness among sports figures, the same way Charles Barkley's DUI was the last one of those to ever happen....

Nationals And Pirates Combine To Make Pretty Decent Baseball Team
Houston and Washington had some unfinished business yesterday, wrapping up a suspended game that took two months, two cities and three teams to complete. And the winning pitcher got the decision while taking a nap in Philadelphia....

Houston Nutt Is Officially A Reality TV Star
Coming soon to a TV probably not near you: "Gridiron U," a "made for television authentic show" about Houston Nutt's Mississippi team, which isn't, as far as I know, Gridiron U. This was supposed to be reality, right? [PR Newswire]...

Roger Clemens Answers Questions From A Curious Houston Fan Base
Upholding a promise he made in May, Roger Clemens answered questions from Houstonist readers about his "situation." He seems in good spirits. Oh, and he signs off with "Peace In the Middle East." Like Diddy. [Houstonist]...

Epic Rant Exposes Dark Side Of Houston Cougar Baseball
There are few things people enjoy more than listening to an angry parent complain about their kid's lack of playing time, but when it's a single-page, 16,000-word website with lots of CAPS LOCK, that's a different story....

Owen Daniels Uses Facebook To Negotiate New Contract With Texans
Owen Daniels, Houston Texans tight end and perennial fantasy sleeper, has taken his dissatisfaction with his current contract public to both friends and strangers across America on his Facebook page....

Like Mulan, But With More Devastating Foot Injuries
Yao Ming set to star in Chinese animated movie. [ESPN]...