i Page 7808 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Love Those Dolphins!
• A Dolphins fan sticks by his boys. [Shot To Nothing] • China will not let you mess with their corporate sponsors. [Lion In Oil] • The NHL stats channel. [Going Five Hole] • Pretty awesome facial hair on Greivis Vasquez. [Mr. Irrelevant] • The sad, lonely, 'roiding Pirate. [Where Have You Gone, And...
Year In Review: April
You might remember, toward the end of last year, when we reviewed each month of the past year leading up to New Years Day. We called it, imaginatively, "Year In Review." We continue today with April. We're digging through our archives pretty well, but if you think we should definitely feature someth...
Mexico's Failed Letter Of Contrition
Another fun story lost in the Mitchell Report tidal wave yesterday? The release of Michael Vick's letter to Judge Hudson attempting to get his sentence reduced. (PDF)...
Could This Be, At Long Last, The World's Funniest Name?
Just when this Mitchell Report business had about pummeled us senseless, one brave man marched forward to bring forth laughter once again. And he didn't have to say a word. Sorry, Kosuke Fukudome ... but this guy's name has got you beat. In fact, this just may be the best name ever. Say it with me, ...
ESPN's Featured Comment Of The Day
ESPN combed its message boards this morning to find its wittiest, boldest, most enlightening comment, and chose this one above all others ......
The Cubs Finally Rid Themselves Of Their Savior
This was lost in all the shuffle yesterday, so we held it for today. So: As a Cardinals fan, allow us a brief moment of sublime amusement at the Cubs' release of Mark Prior. (Not least of which because the Cardinals are reportedly very interested in the man.)...
Mitchell Report Blogdome
It's the day after the Mitchell Report; dad is passed out under the tree, the cat is covered in tinsel, torn wrapping paper is everywhere. Meanwhile, on the Interwebs, reaction crystalizes ......
The End Of Roger Clemens. Finally.
We think ESPN's Jayson Stark had the most comprehensive and dead-on take on the Mitchell Report, particularly the public perception that those names in the report are guilty without a shadow of a doubt despite evidence that wouldn't even stand up in a civil case. Not that it really matters; we wante...
If Sean Salisbury Knew What Hockey Was
For the rest of 2007, the NHL Closer will be written by the fine folks at Melt Your Face Off. Enjoy....
The Wizards Can't Feel Their Faces
The NBA Closer is written by our own Canadian weekend maestro J.E. Skeets. When he's not busy scouring the box scores or eating slow-smoked ribs and beef briskets, he can be heard on The Basketball Jones daily podcast. Enjoy!...
About Last Night
What you missed due to a slight hemorrhoid flareup ... • NFL: Hey, the Texans played the Broncos last night. Hey! Hello? Is this thing on? • NHL: Luke, I'm your father, eh. Turn to the dark side you hoser. Hemsky, Oilers end Red Wings' win streak, 4-3. • Actual headline: "Steroids Report Upstages Go...
So, What Does It All MEAN?
Whew! OK, now everyone can just relax and read the whole actual Mitchell Report. We're sure everyone will be drawing up a Cognac and poring through tonight....
To Watch Tonight
What to watch as you straggle home from your Mitchell Report after-party ... • NBA: Washington at Miami; San Antonio at L.A. Lakers. How is Barkley not named in the Mitchell report? [TNT] • College women's volleyball: Division I tournament, semifinal, at Sacramento, Stanford vs. Southern California....
Look, Kids! Football!
Hey, so here's something: There's an NFL game tonight! No, really! Don't worry, though: It's a game between two teams you don't care about, on a network you can't watch. So relax....
Bobby Cox And Friends
This picture was taken at a recent charity event in Atlanta for homeless pets. We cannot put a finger on why it mesmerizes us so, but man, it does. We feel like we just watched that home movie in "The Ring." And we're not sure why. But hey: No Chipper in the steroid report!...
MLB Doctor: Steroids Are Good For You!
So you don't have to sift through the whole document, we're gonna call out some key pages....
Mmmm, It's A Boatload Of Goodness
Who can make the sun rise? Sprinkle it with dew? Fred Smoot can, that's who! How could an energy bar endorsed by the former Vikings sex boat participant — and produced by a company named 3Way Enterprises — not be a major success? Introducing the Smack Energy Bar!...
Last Chance To Buy Outdated T-Shirt
Anyone who has been annoyed — read: us — by the odd advertisements for Gawker Media T-shirts over the last month is in luck: The Gawker Shop is closing down, and you won't be bothered again. This also means this is your last chance to buy that "You're With Me, Leather" T-shirt before it vanishes for...
Miguel Tejada Is Now Houston's Problem
So you don't have to sift through the whole document, we're gonna call out some key pages....
Raking In The Bowl Game Cash
It's always nice to have bad guys in sports, and there aren't many more reliable bad guys than those shady, mysterious characters who run the lower-tier bowl games. And you don't want to know how much money they're making....