i Page 7964 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

HBO: Jessica Simpson Will Not Retard Our Football Camp Show
Everyone getting excited about the upcoming season of Hard Knocks: Dallas Cowboys has every right to be. With a colorful cast of characters to choose from like Terrell Owens, Pacman Jones (please), Tony Romo and the mesmerizing handywork of Jerry Jones' plastic surgeon, it'll be entertaining televis...

To Watch Tonight
What to watch after the Festival of Nudity ... • Boxing: Super bantamweights, Mike Oliver vs. Reynaldo Lopez, at Boston (9 p.m., ET). If Lopez wins, what am I going to do with this Mike Oliver ringtone? [ESPN2] • MLB: Cleveland at New York Yankees (7 p.m., ET). Lee vs. Wang ... Game On! [ESPN] • NBA...

Rocky Statue: Target Of Penguin Terrorist Plot?
You may remember just a week ago that during the Montreal Canadiens/Flyers playoff series, some amped-up Habs fans decided desecration of the Rocky statue would be a good way to show team spirit and ward off an inevitable early round exit. Didn't work....

NBA Playoffs: A Wednesday Night Viewer's Guide
It's hump day, and Basketbawful is here to mount your leg in celebration. Oh, and I'll be previewing tonight's games, too....

Learn The Lesson Of Henri Cochet
Slate's Robert Weintraub, like many of us, loves the old purple prose of early 1900s sportswriting, the Grantland Rices, the men who painted epic tales of warriors, grizzled combatants and lardywarks too manly to wear gloves. In an occasional series, Weintraub writes about the week's best baseball g...

Previewing The Red Wings-Stars
The Deadspin NHL Playoff Previews are brought to you by the five foppish gents at Melt Your Face Off. Please don't wear an ascot when a cravat is called for, or they will be right put out. LeNoceur breaks down the Western Conference Finals....

Mindy McCready's Confessions Haven't Translated Into Album Sales Yet
Mindy McCready, the "troubled" country singer who admitted she had some sort of relationship with Roger Clemens that would probably not be copasetic with Debbie Clemens, is also trying to revinvigorate her stalled country singing career with a new album, reality show, etc. Granted, plenty of other w...

Introducing The Booze Sandwich
So, young Americans, what's your preferred technique for sneaking booze into sporting events? In this day of increased security, one must expand one's horizons and think, as they say, outside the cardboard parallelogram. Witness these enterprising gentlemen and their successful attempt to booze up t...

Shout At The Dogleg
It's no secret that former hair metal icons began replacing their Aqua Net and sperm-killing lyrca with Tommy Bahama wardrobes as soon as most of them hit their 30s. Alice Cooper's like a five handicap, Tico Torres from Bon Jovi's 12.1, and, hey, even Tommy Lee's a 33....

Ned's Losing It
• It would seem like the clock is ticking on Ned Yost. [Chuckie Hacks] • Andrei Kirilenko has had ENOUGH. [The Play In CA] • If we lost 48-0, we'd get naked too. At that point, why not? [OutSports] • How's your favorite college team doing academically? [Rush The Court] • Austria wants you to know th...

It's PETA's World, We Just Live In It
When future generations study the first decade of the 21st Century, the debate of course will turn to the Great Racehorse Protests of 2008. In the wake of the Eight Belles tragedy at the Kentucky Derby, PETA is bringing all guns to bear on the remaining Triple Crown events; planning protests at the ...

Media Approval Ratings: John Kruk
We remember, when John Kruk left "The Best Damn Sports Show" to join "Baseball Tonight," we worried that it would dumb down the show. At the time, it was pretty much Tim Kurkjian, Peter Gammons, Jayson Stark ... a bunch of smart baseball people discussing the great game. Kruk was a different kind of...

Well, That's One Way To Inspire A Child
So, somewhat recently cut Minnesota Vikings defensive lineman Darrion Scott is a charming fellow, full of love, hope and child-rearing tactics that you might not find in the Oprah magazine. Let's take a look into Scott's fortitude-building attempt at putting a plastic bag over his son's head....

ESPN's Featured Comment Of The Day
ESPN scoured its message boards this morning to find its cleverest, boldest, most enlightening comment, and chose this one above all others ......

MLB To 'Draft' Negro League Veterans; Mets To Overpay The Pitchers As Usual
Whenever Dave Winfield and Bud Selig come together to cook up an idea, you know it's going to be good. Reportedly it was the two of them who came up with this one: a ceremonial draft of Negro League veterans by all of the Major League teams, to be held next month. Expect the Nationals to actually in...

Old Track Coaches Don't Die ... But They Don't Fade Away Either
Among the countless reasons why you shouldn't pursue a career in sports: The sports pages will always consider what you do news, even if you haven't worked in sports in years and find yourself arrested for something that has nothing to do with sports. Once a news item, always a news item....

Guys And Dolls: Floyd, White Sox Back On Top
The inflatable sex doll community was shocked on Tuesday night when Chicago's Gavin Floyd once again lost a no-hitter in the late going; giving up a double to the Twins' Joe Mauer with one out in the ninth. (Inset: "Nooooo!"). Bobby Jenks came on to get the final two outs in the White Sox's 7-1 vic...

Baby's First Breathalyzer Exam: Priceless
One of the reasons I don't attend many minor league baseball games in Tennessee: All the drunken babies. It's the Chattanooga Lookouts' popular Half Price Beer Night For Babies promotion, in which anyone two or younger can get completely hammered under the close supervision of team mascot Looie the ...

Merciful God Answers Prayers, Ends Game 1 Of Cavs-Celts Series
The NBA Closer is written by Matt McHale, who woke up this morning without Internet access and had to rush off to a Caribou Coffee, where the "free WiFi hotspot" actually cost him a bag of Deep River potato chips. When he's not finding a way to do his Deadspin column at the last second, he can be fo...

About Last Night
What you missed while at a stop sign ... • NBA: LeBron makes two key baskets against Celtics. Unfortunately, he missed his other 16 shots. Boston 76, Cleveland 72. • MLB: Diamondbacks' Randy Johnson somehow gets all of his surgically enhanced body parts to work in unision to earn 6-4 win over Philli...