ick Page 393 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

The Sharks Are In The Finals, Finally
Joe Thornton and Patrick Marleau were the first two picks in the 1997 draft. They’ve played a couple thousand games in teal. They’ve both been captains, and both stripped of the “C” for perceived leadership failures and criticisms that for however good their Sharks were, they were never quite good e...

Miguel Cabrera Was Very Impressed With The Pitch That Struck Him Out
Miguel Cabrera is on quite the run right now, but Jeremy Hellickson got him to take a rip at a strike three that fell harmlessly in the dirt far from Cabrera’s flailing bat. He is a fun dude who knows when to give respect when he gets owned, so he flashed Hellickson a cool thumbs up almost before Ca...

Evgeni Malkin Slashed Ryan Callahan In His Penis And Balls
Ryan Callahan slashed Evgeni Malkin’s hands with his stick in the first period of Game 6, so the Pittsburgh center responded by taking a two-handed whack at Callahan’s down-belows. As Callahan’s reactions shows, he connected....

How I Accidentally Made The First Official Cuba-To-Florida Kayak Crossing
The shortest distance from Cuba to the United States is about 90 miles across the Florida Strait. By the standards of human-powered sea travel, it’s extremely doable, and it has been done for decades by refugees aboard the most makeshift of watercraft, driven by desperation. In the peak years, tens ...

"Pandemonium" As Hibernian Wins First Scottish Cup In 114 Years
David Gray’s 92nd-minute header pushed Hibernian to a 3-2 win over Rangers and delivered the north Edinburgh club its first Scottish Cup trophy since 1902—sparking madness at Hampden Park as fans stormed the pitch....

Kickboxing Child Cartwheel-Kicks Opponent
The fighter in white was not prepared for this match, and got two feet delivered to her face....

Brandon Phillips Freaked Juan Uribe Out With A Fake Tag
Major League Baseball is apparently all about fun and mischief tonight, as another NL second baseman tricked a baserunner with a deke. Daniel Murphy got Yoenis Cespedes with a fake throw earlier tonight, and Brandon Phillips caught Juan Uribe loafing off second base with his empty glove. Poor Uribe ...

Daniel Murphy Freezes Yoenis Cespedes With The Ole Fake Throw Trick
NL hitting leader Daniel Murphy and his new buddies on the Washington Nationals are in New York to take on the Mets, for whom Murphy jerked some postseason dongs last year. Washington put a whooping on New York last night, and they’re up big tonight thanks to Matt Harvey’s bad start....

Braves' Erick Aybar Taken To Doctor After Swallowing Chicken Bone
Are the Atlanta Braves cursed? Shortstop Erick Aybar was scratched from tonight’s lineup after part of his lunch got lodged in his throat....

MLS Keeper Nick Rimando's Fucked-Up Finger Is A Good Party Trick
Real Salt Lake goalkeeper Nick Rimando shared an Instagram photo of his hand yesterday, and his pinkie looked like it’s trying to get away from the rest of his hand. You were warned:...

Phil Mickelson Named In Insider Trading Complaint
Golfer Phil Mickelson was named today in an insider complaint by the U.S. Securities and Exchange Commission, two years after an investigation was first reported. The SEC alleges that Mickelson profited $931,000 from non-public information after buying and selling stock in the Dean Foods company....

Pittsburgh's HBK Line Is The NHL's Hottest
The verb that came to mind watching last night’s 4-2 Pittsburgh win was “overwhelms.” You can hold off the Penguins for a while, you can even shut down a scorer or an entire line for games at a time, but they’ve got so much talent, they’re so deep with scorers up and down their bench and offer barel...

Juan Lagares Did A Pretty Convincing Willie Mays Impression
When Willie Mays made The Catch in 1954, the New York Giants played in the Polo Grounds, which was a goddamn huge ballpark shaped like a horseshoe with a 483-foot center field fence. He had to get way the hell back there to make the over-the-shoulder grab. Given the dimensions of the ballpark, it’s ...

Report: Knicks Will Hire Jeff Hornacek As Head Coach
According to Bleacher Report’s Howard Beck, the New York Knicks will hire former Suns coach Jeff Hornacek to lead the team next year. Hornacek went 101-112 in two seasons and change with the Phoenix Suns, and he was at the helm when they almost made the playoffs in 2013-2014. He was fired after the ...

Who Sends Dick Pics? (Lunatics, Apparently)
As an Old Person (and possibly a prude, although I hope not), I’m baffled by the dick pic. As a behavior, first of all—What is it intended to accomplish? Is it meant as an act of sexual hostility? A sincere come-on? Do straight men genuinely believe women are turned on by crappy smartphone snapshots...

Birds, Ranked
Drew ranked the lamest birds over at GQ.com today, and we’re all fairly pissed at him for turning our work chatroom into a warzone filled with bird takes for a piece he didn’t even publish on this site. (Shout out to Burneko for his all-time terrible opinion, “seagulls are good.”)...

Mayor Of Probably Calgary Mad Over Raptors Poll Snub
The Raptors and their fans have played the “nobody believes in us” card faster and harder than just about anyone, quite possibly because nobody believes in them. But things have reached a fever pitch in Wherever The Raptors Are From, thanks to the limitations of an online poll....

Rougned Odor Doesn’t Regret Walloping Jose Bautista, Claims Self-Defense
The Rangers and Blue Jays had a batshit insane brawl yesterday that featured a series of fights and plenty of intense yelling, but all that noise doesn’t amount to much, since Rougned Odor slugging Jose Bautista was so clean and violent that it’s taken on a life of its own outside the specific conte...

Fat Joe Says "I Got A Story To Tell" Was About Anthony Mason
Music and sports fans alike have spent years trying to figure out the true identity of the unnamed New York Knick mentioned in Biggie’s “I Got A Story To Tell.” Bomani Jones and Dan Le Batard, hosts of ESPN’s Highly Questionable, have been particularly dogged in their pursuit of the truth, and today...
![Blue Jays And Rangers Brawl, Completely Ignore Game [UPDATE: They Brawled Again]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/dzytltukqx096x7lbsyd.gif)
Blue Jays And Rangers Brawl, Completely Ignore Game [UPDATE: They Brawled Again]
Toronto and Texas brawled in the top of the eighth as punches were flying while the ball was still bouncing around the field. We’re waiting on a good video replay; for now, enjoy this feed from Fox Sports Southwest and KRLD....