ick Page 525 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Rickie Weeks Would Have Tried To Turn A Double Play, But He Forgot
The situation: Giants-Brewers, top of the second. Runners on first and second, one out. Brandon Crawford bounces one toward Cesar Izturis at short, but a chance to turn an inning-ending double play instead becomes a routine 6-4 putout because Rickie Weeks has a brain fart and thinks he just recorded...

How Readable Are Bill Simmons, Jason Whitlock, Rick Reilly, And Other Sportswriters? Science Investigates
The last time we played around with sportswriter analytics, we wondered if we could algorithmically determine a column's author based on his favorite words. (We could!) For a followup, I decided to look at the readability of different writers. Reading level is a nebulous concept and hard to define p...

Rick Reilly Has Golf Jokes For You Because Rick Reilly Is Everything Horrible About ESPN
Do me a favor right now: Drive out to your local exurb. Now, find the nearest Cheesecake Factory in that exurb, walk up to the bar, and try and spot the 40-year-old fellow wearing pleated chinos, loafers, and a button-down shirt with his real-estate company's logo on it. You see that guy? THAT is Ri...

Antonio Cromartie Can't Stop Sexing Ladies, Apparently Married A Crazy One
Antonio Cromartie, he of the prolific loins, thought he had finally settled down. He married Terricka in 2010, and has two kids with her—and two more on the way....

Indian Cricket Squad Celebrates Backdoor Playoff Berth With Terrifying Homage To Goatse
There's a lot to lose in translation when it comes to cricket, but this much we know: this picture, posted on facebook, is terrifying. "Nightmare fuel" is not something to be bandied about, but I feel confident in its application here....

Which One's The Crackpot? Which One's The Lesbian? Know Your Rickettses, The Politically Active Cubs Owners
The newspaper headlines make it seem like the Chicago Cubs owner is up to no good. "Cubs Owner Ricketts' Anti-Obama Ad Proposal Risks Stadium Growth." "Report: Emanuel 'livid' with Cubs owner after soliciting Jeremiah Wright attack ad proposal." Sounds like this Mr. Ricketts has really vexed some fo...

The Los Angeles Kings Are A Hotter Ticket Than The Clippers
All three of the professional teams that call LA's Staples Center home are in the playoffs, and all three are scheduled to play host to opponents this weekend—a total of six games in four days, in fact, beginning with last night:...

Meet The Boxing Coach Whose Specialty Is Training "A Bunch Of Fucking Nerds, Wall Street Guys"
Eric Kelly gives boxing lessons at the Church Street Boxing Gym, which is located in New York's Financial District. His credentials speak for themselves: four-time national amateur champion, two-time New York City Golden Gloves champion, alternate for the 2000 U.S. Olympic team, a lazy left eye fro...

Derrick Rose Is Now Getting Around With A Walker
With his recovery expected to take eight to 12 months, we all knew the Bulls' superstar was in for a grind. But this is just so sad. Until we saw this photo, we had no idea his rehab regimen would also include bingo games, afternoon naps, and the occasional early-bird special....

These "Rangers Vs. Nets" Tickets For Tonight Look Legit
Fifteen rows back from the glass, right on the blue line, guy's asking 150 a pop, barely half of face value? You'd be a fool not to snap these up, unless you want to to miss Kris Humphries posting up on Ryan McDonagh. [@Lock]...

Rick Reilly's Auto-Response To Reader Email Is More Clever Than Rick Reilly's Actual Column
Ever email your constructive criticism to a sportswriter, only to receive a crappy, needlessly hostile response? Forward the emails to us at [email protected], subject: Crap Emails....

Devils Launch "Don't Sell Tickets To Rangers Fans" Campaign
Compared to the old place at the Meadowlands, the Prudential Center is clean and modern...and really, really easy to get to from New York City. This tends to lead to the Rock being lousy with Rangers fans, something that could get a little embarrassing come playoff time. So the Devils aren't going t...

Don Nelson Finally Will Graduate From College This Weekend
You know what they say. All these dumb NBA players go to college to play basketball, not to learn; it's a farce. No one gets a degree. Things used to be much better in the 1960s before John Calipari and all his fancy sneakers came to town....

Here Are The Best Entries In Our Drunk, Sulking Patrick Kane Photoshop Contest
This fine entry kicked off our Patrick Kane photoshop contest, but somehow we knew our wise readers had more in store. And you did not disappoint. I've picked the best ones here—with special commendation for our winner at the end—because we can cram only so many images into a gallery, but keep in mi...

This Gay Marriage Headline Could Have Used Another Proofreader
From a post on the Seattle Times online about the political stance of Rep. Norm Dicks. We have no words....

Miami Heat Apologize For "Extinguishing" Amar'e Stoudamire
This is what happens when an otherwise personality-less P.A. announcer tries to show a bit of personality. The Miami Heat have now formally apologized for "extinguishing" Amar'e Stoudamire after his sixth foul last night....

Can You Beat This Entry In Our Patrick Kane Photoshop Contest?
One enterprising reader—VidaBlueManGroup—decided to kick off a Drunk Patrick Kane photoshop contest. I think he won it already, by dropping Kaner's Charlie Brown walk into Abbey Road—but we're hungry for a runner-up. We prefer doctored photos that use sulking Kaner, as opposed to party Kaner, but we...

MLB Plans To Ban That Stupid Fake-To-Third, Throw-To-First Pickoff Move
Every baseball game seems to feature at least one of those useless, dilatory fake-to-third, throw-to-first pickoff moves. They never work, they slow down the game, they make you wait even longer for your team's terrible righty middle reliever to give up the lead. Who likes this thing enough to keep ...

Reconstructing Patrick Kane's Drunken Weekend In Madison, With Eyewitness Testimony
On Monday we showed you photos of a soused Patrick Kane in Madison, Wis., and then we asked you if you knew more about what happened while Kane was there. We had heard some bad stories—that Kane supposedly choked a woman, that Kane supposedly said anti-Semitic things—and we wanted to know if other p...

After Amar'e Stoudemire Fouled Out, He Was Gonna Help Shane Battier Up, But ... Nah
Last night, we showed you how the Heat's PA guy made a corny reference to Stoudemire being "extinguished from the game" when he fouled out. But this video shows you what happens at the end of that clip, when Amar'e decides to lend a helping hand before he doesn't....