illinois Page 9 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
In One Way, The Illini Already Are Champions
The college football season is but three days away, and to the hardcore fan, that means only one thing: The Fulmer Cup has been awarded! And yes, this year's winner of Every Day Should Be Saturday's yearly ode to collegiate athlete malfeasance is one that hits us close to the heart. Somewhere aroun...
Danny Almonte's Big League Dreams
So this is sad: Danny Almonte, the onetime Little League World Series legend who turned out to be older than everyone had sad — and ended up marrying a woman 11 years his senior — is gonna need himself a new career....
Yes, EIU Wrestlers, We Understand Your Point
Last month, the Eastern Illinois University wrestling program was discontinued by the school, which cited low academic marks from the team. The grapplers immediately protested in the only way they know how....
Jack Trudeau Likes Alcohol ... Policemen, Not So Much
It's that time of year. The kids are graduating from high school, and former Colts quarterbacks are getting them shitfaced. It seems like just yesterday, it was me donning the cap and gown, getting my diploma, and Jeff George threatening to beat my ass if I couldn't do a keg stand for 45 seconds....
Michael Jordan Ready To Bag Champaign Coeds
Beware, Alpha Phis gallivanting around at Kam's or C.O.'s: Michael Jordan's gonna hit your campus soon, and he doesn't care for your "no cigar smoking inside" rules....
Clog, The Illini Way
Our father's birthday is in August, and we were trying to figure out what we should give to him. It's difficult to shop for Dads; we're not sure there's any Cardinals merchandise left....
Sweet 16 Pants Party: Kansas Vs. Southern Illinois
Kansas Jayhawks (32-4) vs. Southern Illinois Salukis (29-6) When: 7:10 p.m. ET Where: San Jose...
Nothing But Fleabags For You, No. 15 Seed!
There's a clear caste system in college basketball, and it appears it is set up entirely by where you are seeded. Just take a look at Southern Illinois; as a No. 11 seed a few years ago, they were shacked up in a moldy, rundown hotel. Now, as a No. 4 seed?...
NCAA Pants Party: Southern Illinois Vs. Holy Cross
Southern Illinois Salukis (27-6) vs. Holy Cross Crusaders (25-8) When: Friday, 9:40 p.m. Where: Columbus...
NCAA Pants Party: Virginia Tech Vs. Illinois
Virginia Tech Hokies (20-11) vs. Illinois Fighting Illini (23-11) When: Friday, 7:10 p.m. Where: Columbus...
Illinois Fighting Illini
1. Breaking The Social Contract. In a season that was riddled with repeated freak injuries and the thank-God-we-might-not-have-to-talk-about-the-Chief-anymore madness, the most bizarre story was the late-season car crash involving guard Jamar Smith and center Brian Carlwell. In case you've been fort...
Southern Illinois Salukis
1. Watch Yo Mouth. Among many famous alums - Dennis Franz, Shawn Colvin, Bob Odenkirk, John Belushi (though it's up for debate whether or not he actually attended a class) - without a doubt the coolest Saluki grad is Richard Roundtree, best known as SHAFT. In addition to being the private dick who g...
The Last Night Of The Chief
Last night, as tons of teary-eyed Central Illinoisians will tell you this morning, was the final dance of Chief Illiniwek, the skipping, painted white-guy-dressed-up-as-Injun who has "performed" at halftime of our alma mater's sporting events for the last 80 years or so. Like most alums — or at leas...
Champaign's Long National Nightmare Is Over
As an old lifer at the Daily Illini, no story was less fun to talk about than Chief Illiniwek. We once had our own personal take on the embattled "symbol" of the University of Illinois, but we don't even remember what it was anymore: It was talked about every day, in the most banal and "emotional" t...
Trying To Understand The Illini Car Crash
Now that Illini center Brian Carlwell's condition after Monday's accident in a car driven by teammate Jamar Smith has been upgraded to "fair," we think it's probably OK to look at some of the more bizarre aspects to the crash....
Inside The Awful Illini Car Accident
As most of you have heard by now, two Illinois basketball players — center Brian Carlwell and shooting guard Jamar Smith — were injured in a car accident last night in Champaign. Smith suffered a concussion, but Carlwell is currently listed in critical condition at Carle Foundation Hospital, a hospi...
Ron Zook Will Turn Your Conventional Wisdom Upside Down
Our beloved alma mater, the University of Illinois, is having a mediocre year in basketball and has won, like, four games in two years, even forcing us to sit through a 33-0 loss to Rutgers last year that mostly resembled a cock fight between a rabid rooster and an egg. But worry not, fellow alums: ...
Don't You Forget About Ron Zook
The Florida Gators might have overcome a few years of questionable coaching decisions, rugby-style kicks, random substitutions and BALLS OUT INTENSITY to win a national championship ... but rest assured, Ron Zook shall return triumphant! The Zooker's improving! And comin' atcha!...