in Page 4026 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Some Helpful Sports Tips To Surviving Valentine's Day
Well, kids, it's Valentine's Day, which, for sports fans, means a day in the middle of the most barren sports month of the year to come up with tortured analogies and Manning-Chesney jokes. Hey, everybody needs a news peg....

Wrapping Up The Westminster Dog Show
The Westminster Dog Show at Madison Square Garden features the finest athletic specimens at MSG since ... well, since the last Dog Show. We don't consider competitive dog preening a sport, but we do find it funny, and we think Best In Show is one of the funniest movies ever made....

Charlie Weis Hates Internal Bleeding Much More Than He Hates Donuts
In case you've fallen behind on your coverage of failed gastric bypass surgery involving major college football coaches, Notre Dame head whale Charlie Weis is in Day One of his negligence trial in which doctors ignored internal bleeding warning signs. Weis underwent the surgery in 2002 because he wa...

Eli Manning Has A Hard Time Meeting Girls
We don't listen to the radio much — we're too busy with Meat Loaf and REO Speedwagon on an endless iPod loop — so we missed this little tidbit from the Opie and Anthony "show." Some guy named Jason Itzler, who used to run the NY Confidential "escort" service, was a guest on the show, and the hosts a...

Inside The Awful Illini Car Accident
As most of you have heard by now, two Illinois basketball players — center Brian Carlwell and shooting guard Jamar Smith — were injured in a car accident last night in Champaign. Smith suffered a concussion, but Carlwell is currently listed in critical condition at Carle Foundation Hospital, a hospi...

Dan Hawkins REALLY Wants You To Practice More
Colorado Buffaloes head coach Dan Hawkins was hired because he's not the type of guy to lure his players in with strip clubs and booze, unlike his predecessor. We respect that; nobody wants that for college students....

Deep, DEEP Inside The Westminster Dog Show
Starting yesterday and concluding today, the Westminster Dog Show at Madison Square Garden features the finest athletic specimens at MSG since ... well, since the last Dog Show. We don't consider competitive dog preening a sport, but we do find it funny, and we think Best In Show is one of the funni...

Why West Virginia Is So Good At Home
Just to make sure we end your day on as lowbrow a point as we can possibly muster, here's the reason UCLA lost to West Virginia on Saturday. This guy. Let this be a lesson for all of you: Do not come into this guy's house and expect to escape alive....

What Kind Of Bet Would The Pink Taco Make?
When mayors make their yearly dopey bets on certain sports series — "If the Colts win, you'll give us your deep dish pizza, and if your Bears win, we'll give you some dreary dead-end manufacturing jobs!" — it's silly, but kind of cute, in a "white people in suits trading beans" type of way. But when...

NBA Roundup: Celtics Finally Win! (Just Kidding, They Lost As Usual)
Notes on Sunday's games in the National Basketball Association ......

I Don't Think This Is How Paintball Is Supposed To Be Played
I don't know what it is about this that makes me laugh... but I sort of wish two of my friends would agree to do this while I stood there and laughed at them. I can't think of any good reason why they or anyone else would, but I'd enjoy it. From the YouTube description:...

The Eye Of The Tiger Will Save A Serbian Village
Zitiste is a small Serbian town with a population just over 3,000. I guess the village is only mentioned in the news when they're hit with floods, and they're getting tired of it. To counteract this, they're spending money on not some sort of drainage or irrigation system, but... a big Rocky statue....

Agent Zero Fails To Back It Up
Gilbert Arenas had vowed to get 50 points against the Blazers today, in his continuing revenge tour against the coaching staff of the US Olympic basketball team. Blazers head man Nate McMillan was one of those coaches. Gilbert even implored ESPN to pick up the game to witness his spiteful heroics. H...

You Must Limber Up Before Cheering On The Flying Dutchmen
If this were happening at a powerhouse Division 1 school, it would be annoying. Since it's the Flying Dutchmen (and that might not be a misnomer, they might all actually be Dutch) of Division III Hope College, however ... I find it adorable....

The Bear Had No Use For Sideline Reporters
The more I watch this, the more I laugh. That's legendary Alabama coach Paul "Bear" Bryant, just barely stopping short of saying something like, "Look, you stupid bitch." Today's coaches (for the most part) are too publicly polite to embarrass a sideline reporter by pointing out the absurdity of the...

And To Think That In Some Countries, These Dogs Are Eaten
The Temple Owls aren't having much of a year, so Bill Cosby's got some time on his hands. And what better way to fill that time than becoming a dog show person? The Cos has an entry in the upcoming Westminster Dog Show ... not just any entry, but a favorite to win. Bill Cosby is the anti-Ron Artest....

Brendan Haywood and Etan Thomas Need a Timeout
Someday, the Washington Wizards are going to bring in a decent center, and he's going to kick both of their asses. Brendan Haywood and Etan Thomas reportedly got into a fight at practice, which would make their third fight over the last two years....

Week In Review: You Can't HANDLE John Amaechi!
• We welcomed the great Will Blythe to these here parts. • To repeat: We feel bad for this guy's little brother. • A look at Harold Reynolds' contract. • A.J. Daulerio filed his last report from Miami and then took a well-earned vacation. Look out for Stu! • Hello, Santiago! • Ron Zook, kicking your...

Baseball Players Hitting Each Other With Chairs
For those of you who pay attention to such matters, TNA wrestling is having some sort of pay-per-view event this weekend that will feature "Team Pierzynski" vs. "Team Eckstein." That's A.J. Pierzynski and David Eckstein, two people who have never been in our kitchen. In this "promo" clip, Pierzynski...
