in Page 4054 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

A Day At Paul Brown Stadium
So, we are sad to report that we did not make it to Bengals wide receiver Chad Johnson's dramatic interpretation of the chicken dance at Cincinnati's Oktoberfest on Saturday afternoon; we figured by the time we actually made it downtown, we'd be too far away to see anything but the tip of Johnson's ...

Michael Irvin, Koren Robinson, And Ricky Williams Have A Song For You
Click icon to play video ...

That's Never Been MY Experience
Do me a favor. Click this link, check out the headline, then come back. I'll wait....

Week In Deadspin: Clap Your Hands Say "Cough"
• If you can't punch a bouncer for yelling at you for bringing underage girls into a bar, jeez, what's the point of playing quarterback? • Everybody get fired up about your prostate! • It's not barking anymore: Now Browns fans steal your wheels. And then they poop on towels! • "Hey, Rob!" • You know...

Nothing Says "Sloth" Like A Long College Football Saturday
As has been established, tomorrow is a day for much gluttony/sloth/greed/skinny ladies' head in the box: seven pretty outstanding college football games. And no, we're not referring to Syracuse-Illinois. We are actually offended that the game is on television....

Cultural Oddsmaker: A Very Special Episode
AJ Daulerio's Cultural Oddsmaker runs every Friday. Email him to let him know what you think. Oh, and apologies, again, to The Dugout....

Rollo Tomasi ...
It's Christmas Eve in the City of Angels ... while decent citizens sleep the sleep of the righteous, hopheads prowl for marijuana, not knowing that a man is coming to stop them! Celebrity crimestopper Jack Vincennes, scourge of grasshoppers and dope fiends everywhere!...

Taking One ... "Yeoooowwww, Kelly Clarkson!" ... For the Team
What with the price of gas and all, there apparently isn't a lot to do over at the Basney Honda in South Bend, Ind. So co-workers told Jason Gordon that they would chip in and get him two tickets to the Notre Dame-Michigan game, and all Gordon had to do to earn them was get a full body wax. Irish fa...

See, We Weren't Making It Up
So remember the Bubba Bobble Challenge Sex Doll Races tournament, in which the guy was disqualified for — get THIS! — having sex with his "raft?"...

The Closer: The AL Central, As Written By The Coen Brothers
Notes from a day in baseball:...

More People Sprinting Out Of The GAB In Fright
Even though the Reds have had more success this year than most might have anticipated, they haven't felt a major boost at the turnstiles, with attendance up slightly, but not significantly, over last year. So they've come up with a new idea for bringing fans to the ball park: Make them feel like the...

No Better Reason To Get In A Bar Fight Than This One
This pasty fellow, described by Every Day Should Be Saturday as "so aggressively white that bleach is afraid of him," is South Carolina quarterback Blake Mitchell, who was arrested after a bar fight early Wednesday morning....

What, All Flights To Utah Were Booked?
Whenever we blow $600,000 on blackjack and loose women, we know that it's time for another trip to Cuba. Olympic officials in Thailand recently had that same thought, as they packed off Olympic boxing champion Manus Boonjumnong to the balmy shores of North America's favorite island, with the notion ...

Fast Times In The AL Central
We can't imagine what it must be like to be a fan of an American League Central team right now. (Unless of course you're an Indians or Royals fan, in which case you've certainly moved on to the unparalleled bundles of joy that are the Browns and Chiefs.)...

GW Hoops Coach Just Can't Wait To Turn Head And Cough (Or Whatever It Is They Do These Days)
Thanks to the increasingly indispensible DC Sports Bog, we have the rare opportunity to see the head coach of a major college basketball franchise pretty damned excited to get himself a prostate exam....

By This Rationale, Most Of You Are "Hazed" Every Weekend
OK, what does this picture say to you, other than "They should really think about having those big whiteheads removed, or popped, or something?" Does this look like some debacherous, out-of-control, dangerous exercise? A way to maliciously prey on unsuspecting freshmen who don't understand the horro...

Smiles, Everyone! Smiles!
As we mentioned Tuesday, FIFA president Sepp Bladder wants to get Marco Materazzi and Zinedine Zidane together on an island for a final reconcilliation concerning the infamous World Cup head-butting incident. But after a full 24 hours of being mocked by the British tabloids, this crackpot scheme may...

Being Brad Lidge
We are accustomed, in sports, to one moment changing everything; it's probably the main reason we watch. But it's forever fascinating to see how one moment can affect a human being, morphing them from a dominant force of nature to a scared boy in big pants, alone out there. These moments can't make ...

Chad Johnson Is A Chicken Dance Maestro
As many have pointed out before, the vast majority of hardcore NFL fans have never attended an actual game in person. Factors include the rarity of games, the high ticket expense and the fear that someone in a dog mask will steal your wheelchair....

Dr. Z Hangs Out With Swimsuit Models
We know, we know: The unconditional love for SI scribe Rick Reilly's "Riffs Of Reilly" segment — sample comedic genius moment: "USC's quarterback is John David Booty and Texas' is Colt McCoy. Hey, weren't both those guys on 'Gunsmoke?'" Oh, Rick, you slay us! — makes you think that SI.com must be so...