in Page 4055 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Kornheiser, You're Being Glib
We mean no offense to Redskins fans, but when your owner is hosting Tom Cruise in his luxury box — when he's staying at your owner's house — we kind of think that maybe you deserve to lose....
Eventually, It Will Just Be A Graphic Below Irvin's Name
So we haven't actually seen this, so we need someone to confirm it for us, preferably with video. Let that be our disclaimer prologue....
A Slight Change In The Commenting Rules (Don't Worry, It'll Be Fine)
As anyone who has ever spent longer than five minutes around these parts knows, we have the best commenters on the planet. We have yet to make a joke that's funnier than about 10-15 comments that show up in the first five minutes after making a post. We've made our peace with this; we never thought ...
The Fast And The Furryous
If you sat through more than one college football game on Saturday, then obviously you forgot that this past weekend was also the opening of hamster ball racing season. PETCO sponsored races at nearly all of its 800 stores in the U.S. on Saturday, which they called the Hamster Ball Derby. Accordin...
Perhaps Fergie Can Return Punts
They opened up the Pink Taco yesterday ... and the Black Eyed Peas welcomed a new member....
Mess With The Catman, Get The Claws
If we've said it once, we've said it a million times; when football broadcasters are allowed to attempt humor — especially at Fox Sports — it's all of us who suffer. Coming out OK in the end, though, was Carolina superfan Greg Good, known to all as Catman. Let's wrap up the details for you once ag...
Fortunately, It Was To A National Powerhouse Like Rutgers
The last time we were able to watch our beloved alma mater play in the New York City metropolitian area, it was the Coaches Vs. Cancer Jimmy V Classic at Madison Square Garden. The Illini lost by 20 to Providence and Ryan Gomes. We thought it couldn't get any worse....
NFL Roundup: Mangini's Workout Regimen
Muses and ruminations after Week 1 of the NFL ......
One Last Victory Lap For A Deadspin Hall Of Famer
Ask yourself this: Would you sacrifice 1/17th of your yearly salary in return for one full day of irresponsible drunken sex with on a cruise ship, with the finest multiple partners that money can buy? If you answered yes, congratulations: You can hang with Fred Smoot....
Week In Deadspin: Bronzed Leather
• Presenting the inaugural class of the Deadspin Hall Of Fame. • You know, Dave Thomas used to do this all the time. • Bert Blyleven is f—-ing up that f—-ing thing. • Who will Bill Simmons put on notice? • Goodbye, croc hunter man. • Heath Shuler could actually be a winner. • This is how you comme...
Don't Come Kicking In Our Homeroom Door 'Cause Of Something We Didn't Do
Throw one at us if you want, hash head. We've got all five senses and we slept last night ... that puts me us up on the lot of you....
Boxing's Death Knell Finally Arrives
Well, now boxing has officially gone to hell. Blogger Mark Evanier was excited to learn recently that Mattel is bringing back Rock 'em Sock 'em Robots, the toy originally produced by Marx which he never had the chance to own as a child. Excited, that is, until he was flooded by e-mails from readers ...
An Odd Way To Get Your Coach Off Your Back
Because we're just the kind of sniggering, obnoxious, wisenheimer 14-year-olds you think we are, we thought we'd giggle a bit this morning at Steelers lineback Joey Porter, who is in serious danger of becoming a staple around these parts....
Steelers Ruin Dolphins' Quest For Undefeated Season
The good news, Pittsburgh fans, is that you've won your opener 28-17 over the Miami Dolphins, behind three touchdown passes from Charlie Batch (!!!???) and an interception return for a touchdown from Joey Porter, who celebrated by setting the goalposts on fire and then eating them....
It's About Damned Time Charlie Batch Got Some National TV Exposure
You know the NFL season is upon us when Charlie Batch fastens his chinstrap and storms onto the field. It's really what the league's all about, no?...
NFL Pants Party: NFC West
It's our division, the one our Buzzsaw was shipped to so they didn't have to travel to New Jersey, Texas and Pennsylvania every year. And we've (obviously) never won it. Someday ......
NFL Pants Party: NFC East
People are saying that this division is so stacked that it's a pity someone has to finish last. We say think it's a pity someone has to finish first....
Party Crash: Our Birthday Bash
As you might have noticed — mainly because we kind of haven't shut up about it, much to our own detriment — our beloved little site turned one year old yesterday. When we personally turned one year old in 1976, we celebrated by drinking in extreme excess, so we thought we'd do the same thing last ni...