in Page 4072 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
A Most Painful Oblique Injury
And baseball highlights on SportsCenter just got a lot less interesting. Albert Pujols, as it turns out, really is human. He's got a right oblique strain, and he'll be on the shelf for a while. At least two weeks. Perhaps up to six. Perhaps even longer. If Deadspin.com goes dark tomorrow, it's bec...
Week In Deadspin: He Sees All
• Carl Monday, Freedom Fighter. • George Bodenheimer is a fool for romance. • Larry Hughes puts his clothes where his heart is. • How have we survived without Roger Clemens in our lives? • Your two-time NBA MVP. • Carson Palmer, cornholer. • We have World Cup fever, and we're not the least bit ash...
Lamenting The Loss Of Harry, Once Again
For some reason — perhaps it's the Cardinals-Cubs series tonight — but we started becoming rather nostalgic and wistful about Harry Caray today. We're not sure why. Jack Buck was always our favorite announcer anyway. Maybe it's just because we don't have many Harrys anymore; people who are liable to...
You Is Talking Loco ... And We Like It!
We hear words like "beauty" and "handsomness" and "incredibly chiseled features," and for us, that's like a vanity of self-absorption that we try to steer clear of....
Barbaro Finally Responds To Fans
As we have widely documented extensively and in excruciating detail, all kinds of gentle-hearted simps have been sending letters to the injured Barbaro over the last few months....
Question Seems Perfectly Logical To Us
Former Minnesota Twins Bert Blyleven occassionally takes time out of pleading for Hall of Fame election — justifiably, if you ask us — to broadcast Twins games for Fox Sports. The other evening, he was put in the unfortunate position of having to talk to former "American Idol" contest Ace Young (a...
Sport We Don't Understand No. 86: Mountaineering
Whenever someone asks us why we have never climbed Mount Everest, we always reply: too crowded. Seems these days as if the last mile to the summit is like a noontime line at Starbucks. But at least we figured that if we ever encountered trouble, there would be plenty of people around to help us ou...
Sean Taylor Free To Visit All Kinds Of DJs Now
One of our favorite, quietly sublime stories of the last couple months involved Washington Redskins safety Sean Taylor and his battle with a prosecutor who worked as a DJ in his spare time. (His MySpace page included the immortal self-description as a bulging-biceps, headphones-wearing prosecutor ...
Spell F-A-I-L-U-R-E, Kid
We'll confess: We love the Scripps Howard National Spelling Bee. We watch every minute we can, and apparently we're not alone, considering ABC is broadcasting the finals live tomorrow night in primetime. (To the network's eternal credit, Robin Roberts will be hosting, not Stuart Scott. Whew.)...
Scott Sauerbeck Apologizes To His "Fans"
So, for those who might have missed it yesterday, Cleveland Indians relief pitcher Scott Sauerbeck was arrested with a female companion after weaving drunkenly through traffic and then hiding in some bushes behind a house. (That's his mugshot, there.) No explanation had been given for the sudden d...
The King Is Dead, Long Live The King
Zack Hample has insulted us once too often. You remember Hample, the Dead End Kid who claims to have collected more than 2,000 baseballs at major league parks. In a recent post over at his blog, The Baseball Collector, Hample mocks Deadspin in a most egregious and insulting manner concerning Barry...
Jalopnik's Last Missive From Indy
For those of you who weren't around this weekend, our corporate (and spiritual!) friends at Jalopnik were at the Indianapolis 500 this weekend and did their best to cause all kinds of trouble. (They also informed us that Danica Patrick is "much hotter in person." Noted.)...
So, How Is That Horse Anyway?
For those of you who were wondering how everyone's favorite non-sentient being was going in his quest to survive long enough to have sex with any horse in sight, the Associated Press has a full report on jockey Edgar Prado visiting the horse in the hospital today....
Carson Palmer's Charitable Contributions
From what we understand from various Cincinnati residents, the act of "cornholing" is quite big in the area....
I Will Joust You With My Finger, Bitch.
It's very sadly missing from the Sunday TV sports lineup, but there is a hot new sport on the horizon. It's called Finger Jousting, and it's sweeping the... okay, it's not sweeping the nation or anything else. But they do have a website. So that's step one. Here's how the sport works:...
Mmmmm... Milk.
Sam Hornish Jr., who pulled out too soon a little earlier in the race, is now free to pop off anytime he would like. He's your Indy 500 Champion, and for some reason, poured a bottle of milk all over himself immediately afterwards. I understand that it's a tradition, but I think it's one that's a ...
"Sam Hornish Pulled Out Too Soon"
Our pals at Jalopnik are in the corporate hospitality suite, watching the race, and... instant messenging each other. That's not a sentence I thought I'd ever be typing. Here's a snippet:...
NASCAR Gets An Asterisk Of Its Own
When the Coca-Cola 600 kicks off later today, Michael Waltrip will make his 262nd consecutive start, which ranks sixth on the all-time list. But I'm favor of adding a big fat asterisk to Waltrip's spot on the list, because he didn't earn his spot, he bought it....
More From Deep Inside Indy
The Jalopnik fellas continue to penetrate the Indy 500 scene like Fred Smooth with a broomstick. They've already wormed their way into the official Indy 500 parade, ripped the lid off of an apparent child-slavery ring in the Indianapolis area, and taken a lap around the track in the official pace ...
Because We Love A Good Parade...
...particularly when the guys at Jalopnik are able to crash the Indy 500 parade, and somehow end up in the damn thing. They were in the car that was just ahead of the Row 1, in fact. Here, I'll let them explain (part 1, and part 2). The amount of fun these guys seem to be having is just not fair....