ink Page 80 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Streaker Fail: This Should About End This Activity, One Hopes
Not only was this streaker at an English association soccer match in Manchester subdued by a female security guard, but he was also mocked by the crowd for "severe shrinkage." Ouch. [Bury Times]...

Actually, It Should Be Changed to "Free Marko"
Newlywed Marko Jaric is the mystery Grizzlies player accused of sexual assault. What, Adriana Lima isn't good enough? [SI]...

Rinku And Dinesh Will Sign Here, And Initial Here
Jeff Bernstein, the agent for Indian pitching prospects Rinku and Dinesh, reports that the controversy with the Topps representative has been cleared up. He is not a very, very bad man after all....

Rinku And Dinesh Are Boycotting Topps (With Update)
Rinku Singh and Dinesh Patel, the teenage pitchers from India who were signed by the Pirates recently, would like you to know that the man from Topps is a bad man. A very baaaad man....

Maurice Jones-Drew Might Be High Right Now
The lilliputian running back tells Dan Patrick that he's better than most of the running backs in the league. Oh, and he's also training in Egypt, you know, running the pyramids. What a rapscallion. [DP]...

ESPN's Mel Kiper Page Links To Hilarious Profane Car Ad (Update)
This is likely to be removed soon, so hurry: When you click on Mel Kiper's page today, you don't get Mel's NFL draft take. Unless the Matt Stafford debate includes a profane car ad (NSFW)....

The Audacity Of Gulp: President Obama Enjoys A Frosty Beverage At Wizards Game
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap....

Sharks' Practice Rink Is Cursed, Or Something
Two recreational league players collapse and die within hours of each other while playing hockey at Sharks Ice in San Jose. [San Jose Mercury]...

Shooting's A Sport, Right?
I mean, if biathlon is an Olympic sport, then surely this counts as sport-related. I have no idea where or why this video exists, but it does and we are all better for it....

Today In Soccer Or: Deadspin Pub Gets A Special-Use Liquor License
It's been quite some time since someone not named KOGOD or Tuffy discussed the soccer-related events of the day, but the fans of the beautiful game have spoken. Here's what's happening this weekend....

World's Oldest JuCo Player Declared Ineligible
The strange tale of Ken Mink, the 73-year-old college basketball player, took an odd turn as he was recently declared ineligible—and, strangely enough, it wasn't because he is a 73-year-old man playing college basketball....

David Ortiz Is Pretty Confident He'll Pass His Tests
Or he just could use a year off: "Ortiz wants year-long ban for steroid users." [ESPN]...

The Underrated Genius Of Shane Battier
"Moneyball" author Michael Lewis picks apart the Duke legend's unheralded NBA career. It's a long article in the NY Times magazine, but definitely worth a read during your weekend lounging. [NY Times Magazine]...

Tony Kornheiser Talks About His Future At ESPN
"I don't make enough money that they have to worry about getting rid of me. They can do it if they want to. I hope they choose to retain me." [HappyBirthdayDanLevy]...

Adult Site Will Compensate Viewers Whose Porn Was Interrupted By Super Bowl
This joke is going to get old very fast, but kudos to the adult film studio Pink Visual for being among the first to think of it....

An "Omega 4:20" Watch Would Be The Perfect Accessory
It turns out Michael Phelps wasn't completely negligent of his endorsement contracts — at least he was wearing an Omega watch while he conversed with Captain Bongee. [CNBC]...

Rinku And Dinesh Tap Barry Bonds For Insight Into Mysterious "Pirates city"
"Rinku and I going Barry Bonds house. We talking Barry Bonds sir about Pirates city. [W]e learning Willie Stargell, Dave Parker, Roberto Clemente. We learning coaches. We liking Barry Bonds best." [The Million Dollar Arm]...

Book Excerpts That Don't Suck: "Blood In The Cage"
In his new book, "Blood in the Cage, SI writer L. Jon Wertheim examines the furious rise of the UFC and mixed martial arts fighting....

My Super Bowl Party Guest List Is Hereby Set
The years have not been kind to Wendy since leaving Neverland. But she's a lot more fun to hang out with. It goes without saying that's she's a huge celebrity in Japan....