its Page 36 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Lance Armstrong Files Suit Against USADA And Its "Kangaroo Court"
Lance Armstrong is through fucking around. The latest doping charges against the seven-time Tour De France winner and world-class bully have been answered, not with evidence or witnesses, but with a lawsuit. Armstrong has taken the US Anti-Doping Agency to federal court, claiming that USADA's charge...
Rawlings Sues Wilson Over Brandon Phillips's "Gold" Glove
The Gold Gloves are mostly pointless, and largely a corporate gimmick. (They're officially the Rawlings Gold Glove Awards, and have been since 1957, when they were thought up by a Rawlings sales manager for some free advertising.) They have cachet, because they're voted on by managers and coaches, a...
Cherry-Pit Spitting Contest Makes For Great Copy
This is a great article for a sweaty Saturday evening. It's short, sweet and absolutely absurd. Let's start with the headline:...
Babes, Bullets, And Blood. <em>Savages</em>, Reviewed.
Oliver Stone approaches every film he makes as if it's the biggest, most important movie that will ever be made on the subject. When he's working with material to match his grand vision—JFK, Talk Radio, Nixon—he can produce hallucinatory film experiences....
Players Sue NFL Over Bounty Punishments
Grab your popcorn. Two days after upholding his own disciplinary rulings against four Saints players for their roles in the bounty scandal, the NFLPA has filed a lawsuit challenging both the decision, and Goodell's authority to make it. The union is suing on behalf of Anthony Hargrove, Will Smith, a...
How To Eat 1 Gallon, 9 Ounces Of Ice Cream In 12 Minutes Without Getting A Headache: The Secrets Of Ed "Cookie" Jarvis
Tell Me When It's Over is an interview series in which we ask former athletes about the moment they knew their playing days were over. Today: Ed "Cookie" Jarvis, a 46-year-old real estate agent, married father of two, cancer survivor, and retired competitive eater....
Tony La Russa: Asshole Or Dipshit? Let's Discuss!
Tony La Russa was never the cuddliest of MLB managers, and he's done a lot of things that would preclude him from ever being invited to anyone's Christmas party. But the big question remains, is La Russa a dipshit or an asshole? Let's settle this in the discussion section below....
!["It's Just All Made Up And Flagellant": A Tour Of Fred Davis's Hilarious Legal Troubles [UPDATE]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/17rafso5oxas7jpg.jpg)
"It's Just All Made Up And Flagellant": A Tour Of Fred Davis's Hilarious Legal Troubles [UPDATE]
Well, now. Yesterday, The Washingtonian passed along the glorious details of the shitshow civil suit being brought against Redskins tight end Fred Davis by a woman who's accused of being a "pimpette." Long story short: Davis allegedly poured an entire pitcher of juice on the woman's head, and the wo...
How A Career Ends: Danny Manning, No. 1 NBA Draft Pick In 1988, Savored His Garbage Time In 2003
Tell Me When It's Over is an interview series in which we ask former athletes about the moment they knew their playing days were over. Today, with the NBA draft beginning in a matter of hours: Danny Manning, the No. 1 overall pick in the 1988 draft. ...
Latest Concussion Lawsuit Alleges 27-Year-Old Former NFL Guard Arron Sears Can No Longer Care For Himself
The Tampa Bay Buccaneers held high hopes for guard Arron Sears when they drafted him out of Tennessee in the second round of the NFL draft. Instead, he lasted just two years in the league before leaving football due to neurological symptoms. Now, his family claims, the 27-year-old Sears can no long...
Report: Civil Suit Against Jerry Sandusky's Charity Alleges Abuse Began In The 1970s
Now that Jerry Sandusky's officially a convicted pedophile, it was only a matter of time until the avalanche of civil lawsuits against him began pouring forth. According to Johnstown, Pa., television station WJAC, the first one since last week's verdict was filed today on behalf of three of the vict...
Musical Donations For The World's Poor: Oklahoma City Thunder Edition
Usually when a team loses a championship game, the joke is that all those "Buffalo Bills Super Bowl Champions!" shirts get donated to some poor country since they are essentially worthless, but still technically clothing. That's becoming a bit clichéd if you ask me. Recently, we've seen our fair s...
New Jersey Woman Sues Little Leaguer Who Hit Her In The Face With A Baseball
Elizabeth Lloyd was sitting at a picnic table near a fenced-in Little League bullpen watching her son play when she was struck in the face with a baseball. The culprit? A then-11-year-old bullpen catcher named Matthew Migliaccio who was warming up a pitcher....
J.R. Smith's Chinese Team Says He Skipped Nearly Every Single Practice
J.R. Smith couldn't get out of his CBA contract when the NBA lockout ended, but he sure as hell could make life as miserable as possible for his employers. Smith's sister sparked a pair of brawls with opposing fans (Stephanie Smith said of the second fight that she didn't start it "this time.") And ...
Note To Starbucks Baristas Everywhere: If You Find Yourself Serving Coffee To Mitch Albom, Spill It On Him
Mitch Albom, America's favorite fun-sized poetastering fabulist, decided to use his Sunday column space in the shrinking Detroit Free Press to whine about America's service workers in the haughtiest fashion possible....
A Mural Featuring Mike McQueary Tastefully Adorns Happy Valley Titty Bar
Reader Jayme recently returned from a trip to the End Zone Club, a titty joint located in scenic Port Matilda, Pa., just 13 miles away from the Penn State campus. He files this report:...
After 38 Studios Goes Broke, Bank Sues Curt Schilling
Immediately after Rhode Island extended the beleaguered 38 Studios a $75 million dollar loan, Curt Schilling's company took out a $2 million letter of credit from Citizens Bank as the security deposit on their Providence offices. Well, that's all gone now. 38 Studios is bankrupt, the office is close...
There's A Naughtily Named Pitching Matchup In The National League Today
Check it out: Petco Park this afternoon will host a hilarious sadomasochistic pitching showdown between Marquis and Cain! Thwack! You've been very naughty! Double entendres in baseball can't get much saucier than that....
How A Career Ends: I Was The No. 1 Pick In The MLB Amateur Draft, And Now I'm A Cautionary Tale
Tell Me When It's Over is an interview series in which we ask former athletes about the moment they knew their playing days were over. Today, with the MLB amateur draft beginning in a matter of hours: Pitcher David Clyde, the No. 1 pick in the 1973 draft and now an object lesson in how not to handle...
Today In Photograph And Caption Synergy: Caroline Wozniacki Shits A Return
Maybe she had a stomach bug? Maybe she was tired of all the 40-all scores? Whatever the reason, Woz laid a stinker on the court at the French Open today and was ousted by Estonian Kaia Kanepi, 6-1, 6-7 (3-7) 6-3....