ja Page 399 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Whatever Happens, Anderson Varejão Is Going To Be A Dude With A Championship Ring
The Warriors are a ruthlessly efficient team run by a fiery, undersized center who will take out his anger on your dick and balls and a teeny-tiny point guard who carries himself with a non-insistent swagger, and they’re owned by a techno-libertarian pug who named his dogs after Ayn Rand characters....

LeBron James Returned To Cleveland With A Strict, Uncompromising Mentality
During his first go-round in Cleveland, LeBron James was pilloried for all manner of sins—real or perceived—most stemming from the belief that he acted like a tyrant and ran roughshod over the Cavaliers organization. For instance, here is Brian Windhorst the day after The Decision:...

An Extremely Helpful NBA Finals Preview For Basketball Morons
Hello, casual basketball viewer! The NBA Finals begin tonight, pitting LeBron James’s Cleveland Cavaliers against Ayn Rand’s Golden State Warriors in a rematch of last season’s Finals, which the Warriors won in six games. Here’s what to expect, what to look for, and what to pretend to know about eac...

The Hater’s Guide To The 2016 NBA Finals
A few years ago, when my children were very small, I lamented the fact that I had to cut a great deal of sports out of my life. This happens when you have a baby. There’s no time to watch a tetrafinal playoff game because the kid needs to be fed or taken for a stroll or put to bed or have its butt w...

Here's The Punjabi Call Of The Penguins' Game-Winner
Here’s Jim Hughson calling Nick Bonino’s goal with 2:33 left; a little understated. Here’s Doc Emrick; a little more excited, but come on guys, this is a tiebreaking goal late in a Stanley Cup Final game, let’s see some enthusiasm!...

Should There Be Testosterone Limits For Women In Athletics?
South African sports scientist Ross Tucker and transgender medical physicist Joanna Harper have written a fascinating piece on women’s sports, and the current lack of any limits on testosterone levels in female track and field athletes. This issue is likely to be one of the most controversial and im...

<i>All Takes Matter</i> Signs Blogger To Join Colin Cowherd And Jason Whitlock
Jason McIntyre, founder and editor-in-chief of the blog The Big Lead, has officially signed on to join Colin Cowherd, a rat wearing a human suit, and Jason Whitlock on their upcoming Fox Sports 1 show, according to multiple sources with knowledge of the negotiations. The hour-long “discussion and op...

Jose Bautista Murders Beverage
The Blue Jays beat the Yankees tonight and the Blue Jays’ best slugger even had the nerve to take it out on Yankees fans, smashing a beverage (presumably beer?) showering the upper chunk of a section in suds (or maybe soda! who knows!). ...

The Raptors Don't Quit
The Raptors’ two most important players right now are a probably-hurt tiny point guard who, until recently, was having a historically-bad playoffs and an offensively inept center who played 22 minutes per game this regular season. That doesn’t sound like a formula for defeating a team led by LeBron ...

James Conner Says He Is Cancer Free
In December, Pitt running back James Conner announced that he had been diagnosed with Hodgkin’s lymphoma. This afternoon, just over six months later, he announced that he was cancer free. ...

Why Dahntay Jones's Unpaid Suspension Is Only Worth $80
The NBA suspended Dahntay Jones one game “without pay” for whacking Bismack Biyombo in the groin late in Game 3, and while the Cavs might miss the 1.9 minutes per game they’ve gotten from Jones (unlikely), Jones won’t actually miss his game check all that much....

Don't Watch This Video If You Happen To Be David Blatt
Are you David Blatt? The guy who coached the Cleveland Cavaliers all the way to the NBA finals last season, but still managed to lose your job after it became apparent that your star players basically saw you as Droopy Dog? Don’t watch this clip from the Cavaliers’ locker room after Game 2 of the Ea...

LeBron James Is Well And Truly On One Right Now
The Cavs beat the Raptors 108-89 tonight and they’ve now won their first 10 games of the playoffs in a row. The Raptors were in it deep into the second quarter, until the Cavs ripped off a 16-2 run and then they weren’t in it. The 10-game watermark serves as a referendum on both the sickly state of ...

LeBron James Returns To The Scene Of The Crime
Not content with a single rim murder this week, LeBron James tracked down the replacement and jammed it perhaps even more emphatically. Reports indicate that Richard Jefferson planned to serve as an accomplice but got rebuked strongly by James....

James Harrison Wasn't Allowed To Film His Drug Test
Twelve weeks ago, Steelers linebacker James Harrison documented one of his random PED tests on Instagram. It wasn’t very incisive; he showed his followers where he pissed and who watched him to make sure he wasn’t using someone else’s pee. He was tested again this week, but this time around, he rece...

LeBron James Murders Rim
This evening, an innocent (maybe) basketball ring in Cleveland, Ohio was murdered by LeBron James, after he turned DeMarre Carroll into a garden statue and churned into the lane alone....

Rougned Odor Reportedly Suspended Eight Games For Trying To Punch Jose Bautista's Face Off
We all knew a big fine and suspension were coming Rougned Odor’s way, and now there are reports that MLB has finally settled on a punishment. MLB Network’s Jon Heyman reports that the Rangers’ second baseman will be suspended for eight games, and Yahoo’s Jeff Passan adds that he will be fined $5,000...

Barbecue This Big Fruit
Not too long ago, we collectively struggled to come up with a convincing non-meat filling for sandwich, but today the answer seems obvious: jackfruit....

Rougned Odor Doesn’t Regret Walloping Jose Bautista, Claims Self-Defense
The Rangers and Blue Jays had a batshit insane brawl yesterday that featured a series of fights and plenty of intense yelling, but all that noise doesn’t amount to much, since Rougned Odor slugging Jose Bautista was so clean and violent that it’s taken on a life of its own outside the specific conte...

Rougned Odor's Been A Shit For A Long Time
Would it surprise you to learn that Rangers second baseman Rougned Odor, the dude who landed a right hook on Jose Bautista’s jaw and created one of the most memorable GIFs in baseball history, isn’t new to this whole punching people thing?...