james Page 92 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

A Lively Discussion About Futuristic Bathroom Technology
It is a sad fact of life: there are just more questions in the Funbag than there is time to answer them in the average Deadcast. All your horrible thoughts, your deeply considered curiosities about peeing and pooping, and NFL football, and peeing and pooping vis-a-vis Donald Trump—lost, like tears i...

Dirk Nowitzki's Championship Stands Alone
Dirk Nowitzki is finally retiring after two decades with the Dallas Mavericks, and is secure in his legacy as the greatest-ever player from outside the United States thanks to 31,540 points scored, the iconic fadeaway jumper, his 14 all-star teams, and the 2007 MVP award. His once-reviled, or at lea...

Paul George Ended A Crazy Game On A Crazy Bucket
The final minutes of Rockets-Thunder on Tuesday night were a dense flurry of batshit. They featured Russell Westbrook swooshing a runner from 27 feet, Paul George earnestly looking to scrap with P.J. Tucker, and James Harden conducting the Rockets’ woozy show as usual. All of that is weird, but some...

For His Final Act, Magic Made The Lakers Disappear
Probably the Lakers will recover. They’re the Lakers. Anyway, judging by the vaguely bitchy tweets, he wasn’t actually doing all that much work in the first place, and judging by the results of the past two-plus years, he may not have been very good at it....

Magic Johnson Resigns As Lakers President, Which Means He Won't Be Lakers President Anymore
Magic Johnson stepped down tonight from his position as president of basketball operations for the Los Angeles Lakers. The news came during an impromptu press conference before the team’s game against the Blazers. According to Johnson, team owner Jeanie Buss was not aware of this decision or this ev...

<i>Jeopardy!</i> Contestant Crushes Single-Game Winnings Record
A quantum leap helped Jeopardy! contestant James Holzhauer take home a six-figure sum of money on Tuesday. More specifically, Holzhauer correctly wrote down “WHAT IS QUANTUM LEAP” in response to the Final Jeopardy answer and wagered $38,314 to take push his single-day winnings to $110,914. This fina...

Jameson Taillon Somehow Kept Pitching After Taking A 102-MPH Line Drive To The Head
The Cubs kicked off their home opener in style this afternoon, hanging 10 runs on the Pirates within the first four innings. Pirates starter Jameson Taillon was on the mound when the Cubs scored the first six, though all of them went down as unearned runs. He lasted just two innings, which was remar...

Nikola Jokic Tells Ref "I Don't Care" About Second Technical, Promptly Gets Ejected
Denver’s lovable weirdo Nikola Jokic snapped on Sunday night, talking his way into an ejection late in the fourth quarter of the Nuggets’ close home loss to the Washington Wizards by getting in the face of referee James Capers over a no-call. ...

LeBron's Season Is Over
Sure, LeBron’s season was already more-or-less over as far back as three weeks ago, when it became clear the Lakers weren’t going to make the playoffs and LeBron’s role would be limited for the rest of the year. But L.A. made it totally official with a statement today, declaring that they’ll sit LeB...
![Kevin Love "Out" With "Shoulder Soreness" After Instagramming While Drunk [Update]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/js0r2jtzkwqjbw0anmcx.jpg)
Kevin Love "Out" With "Shoulder Soreness" After Instagramming While Drunk [Update]
The Clippers play the Cavaliers today, and Cleveland forward Kevin Love won’t be a part of the game. If you believe the official reports, Love is out (shoulder soreness). But if you were looking at LeBron James’s Instagram this afternoon, you might be inclined to believe that Love is out (sloshed)....

James Harden Cooks His Spiciest Meatball Yet
At this point in James Harden’s absurd season, a 27-point first quarter is not all that shocking on its own. The dude has already logged 57 or more points five times in 2019, and the Rockets’ offense is weirdly at its most effective when Harden gets to step back across the three-point line to his he...

Just Like You, Cam Newton Is Not Having Sex
According to multiple reports from NFL insiders and Deadspin.com, neither you nor Carolina Panthers quarterback Cam Newton are having sex in the month of March. Sources indicate that the news regarding Newton comes as a surprise to those around the league, but about you, not so much....

50 Years Ago, The <i>Washington Post</i> Started One Of The Biggest Controversies In D.C. Basketball History
The Washington Post released its final rankings for the 2018-2019 high school basketball season earlier this week. DeMatha, a school with perhaps the most storied program in the country, ended up in the top spot in the historically hoops-crazy D.C. region for what was officially the 28th time....

An Important Lesson From This Hideous Lakers Season: Shit Happens
The Lakers have lost eight of their last nine games to fall to 11th in the Western Conference, and eight games below .500. The organization appears to be in a state of ugly collapse, helped along by the distracting, doomed courtship of Anthony Davis. Luke Walton is rumored to be on his way out. LeBr...

LeBron James Suffers Latest Humiliation At The Hands Of Mario Hezonja
It was all set up for LeBron James, nearing the end of a crappy first season with the Los Angeles Lakers, to have another one of his moments. He loves to craft highlights on the Knicks’ home floor, and to talk afterwards about how much “the Mecca” means to him as—as a student of basketball history o...

New Music Festival Video Shows James Dolan At Peak Weenie
Less than a week after New York Knicks owner James Dolan threw a fan out of a Knicks game, a new video posted on Twitter today shows Dolan trying to kick a fan out of music festival....

Pissbaby James Dolan Goes On The Radio And Whines About Everything<em></em>
It’s time once again to check in on James Dolan, the infamously oversensitive and multiply delusional owner of the godawful New York Knicks. Dolan went on The Michael Kay Show today to address an incident on Saturday in which he demanded a Knicks fan be thrown out of the arena after the fan told Dol...

Report: The Lakers Actually Wanted Good Players Instead Of The Bad Players They Signed
LeBron James’s first campaign with the Los Angeles Lakers has been an unmitigated disaster. Now that the team has nothing left to do but pack it in and wait for next season to start, it’s time for those within the organization to start assigning some blame in an effort to save their own skin....

Notoriously Thin-Skinned James Dolan Threatens Knicks Fan In Response To Harmless Heckle
James Dolan got his feelings hurt shortly after the Knicks lost to the Kings on Saturday. As Dolan was leaving the garden with his security team, a fan in the stand had the audacity to yell, “sell the team!” When the heckle made its way to his ears, a petulant grin suddenly grew on Dolan’s face. The...

Report: The Lakers Are Giving Up
This has been an awfully shocking season for LeBron James and his Lakers, and it’s only getting worse, as L.A. currently sits 6.5 games out of the playoffs, having lost eight of their last ten. Still, this team hadn’t fully packed it in yet, or at least “sources” told Shams Charania on Wednesday tha...