k Page 4191 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Fun With Trade Rumors
We like it when the Internet has something before the Jayson Starks of the world do, so we're gonna run with this, because it's the end of November and not much is more fun than a good trade rumor. According to MLB Trade Rumors, the St. Louis Cardinals are "close" to a "major" move, with sources s...

Why Your Hometown Columnist Sucks: Peter Kerasotis
It was the best of times. It was the worst of times. It was the age of wisdom. Yes, you read that correctly. Wisdom. How did Charles Dickens miss the boat on this whole one-sentence paragraph thing? Clearly today's breed of sportswriters are far better wordsmiths than the old quill pen-and-in...

A Day In The Life Of The "New" Michael Irvin
Well, it's the day after Michael Irvin's endless string of mea culpas following his arrest on Friday, and if Irvin's appearances had anything in common, it was their high proportion of "mea" to "culpa." Let's look back at Irvin's trip through the ESPN empire:...

Sleepless In Athens, Ohio
You wake up to the light in your eyes. Blinking, you try to adjust. The man with the light is very authoritative, and more than a little pissed. You must have been asleep for a while. Jesus, what time is it?...

Excuse Our Excretory Humor
OK, we're going entirely from memory here, since we haven't been able to find anything else about the exchange on the Web, but that's fine, we'd like to take credit for seeing it anyway. It will reveal just how puerile we really are....

Jeremy Shockey, Premature Joculator
For anyone who missed the end of the Giants-Seahawks game yesterday, Giants kicker Jay Feely missed three field goals late to cost the team a victory. (Oh, as mentioned earlier: Daily News: "Sinking Feely." Post: "Feely The Pain.")...

NFL Roundup: Fore!
• Honestly, what more can you say about Bengals wide receiver Chad Johnson? This will almost certainly be a poll later this week, but his "putt the football with the pilon followed by a Tiger Woods fist pump" was, once again, completely inspired. (All it was missing was an awkward high five.) If t...

Week In Deadspin: Killing The Messengers
• For the last time, please do not let your children go to the University of Miami. • More athlete run-in stories than anyone could possibly handle. • MLB.com and Scott Stapp are here TO ROCK YOU. • Wait ... professors at USC actually expect players to attend class? What kind of racket you people ...

Athlete Run-Ins: Podsednik Takes Six For The Team
Our final athlete run-in story of the day (and the week) comes to us from Jeffrey in Massachusetts. It's about everybody's favorite scrappy World Series hero Scott Podsednik....

Seeing Oddjack Off In Style
As some of you might have heard, our trusty, pathological brother Oddjack announced yesterday that it was taking its ball and going home on December 2. This saddens us — as you've surely noticed, we're big fans of the site — but we know editor A.J. Daulerio will be back haunting the halls of the I...

Our Own, Demented Version Of "Switched At Birth"
Because in a month we're going to be the only people who remember the show, we feel obliged to point out — per a reader's excellent, perceptive eye — that ESPN college basketball analyst Jay Bilas and Will Arnett's ridiculously funny "Gob" from "Arrested Development" look so much like each other t...

Blogdom's Best: New York Giants
It might not — yet — have the online fanaticism and cachet of baseball, but the NFL and its fans are starting to catch up in the world of team-devoted blogs. To this end, Deadspin salutes these modem-addled souls and proudly presents Blogdom's Best, given to the most outstanding blog for each NFL ...

Danica Races To The Altar
Hey wait, a wedding, and we weren't invited? It seems that elfin Indy driver Danica Patrick went and got married over the weekend, right under our noses, and we're just now hearing about it. And the staffers at Star call themselves journalists ... Details are beginning to leak, though (probably t...

Athlete Run-Ins: Another Duke Miracle
Today's first athlete run-in story is one we're sure most of you will enjoy. Why? Because it makes fun of a Duke guy! Everybody loves those!...

Polls: You Love You Some Sheriff
Well, the readers have spoken, and in yet another trouncing — we never have any close polls around here, which we suppose is our fault — your favorite Clinton Portis costume is Sheriff Gonna Getcha, with 38.1 percent of the vote. (We think it's the Led Zeppelin shirt; impossible to resist it.) Sec...

Seizure On Ice
Last evening's terrifying seizure incident involving Red Wings defenseman Jiri Fischer ended with an entire game being cancelled, CPR being given right there on the bench (you can see it in that picture, from the Detroit Free Press) and, ultimately, Fischer was described as "jovial" in the hospita...

Vote: Which Is The Best Portis Alter Ego?
For those of you who haven't been paying attention to the gradual, meticulous mental breakdown of Clinton Portis, the Redskins running back has been dressing up as a new "character" — and, Method-like, staying in character during interviews — for each media conference every Thursday. (It is to Por...

Athlete Run-Ins: Cleaning Up Bonds' Mess
For today's final athlete run-in story, we meet former All-Star — and "RBI Baseball" all-world star — Will Clark, who has always been one of our favorites since going crazy for the Cardinals a few years ago and then flat retiring. This one's from Peter in Denver ......

Oddjack's Monday Night Football Roundup
As endlessly repeated around these parts, we don't gamble on sports, if just because we get stressed out enough watching games without having our wallets riding on them. But nights like tonight, when there's only one game on, and it's kind of a lousy one, we understand. Oddjack has your lines and ro...