k Page 4300 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
New Mexico's Busy Fortnight
Apparently, Marcus "New Mexico" Vick thinks he's a rock star ... or Phil Spector....
Mark Madsen's "Text Messages With The Stars"
Someone just directed us to Mark Madsen's blog — we honestly had no idea he had a blog; a star of such caliber, too! — and pointed out this particularly amusing entry about a cellphone text message he sent to Robert Horry last year, after Horry's huge 3-pointer for the Spurs in the NBA Finals:...
Redskins Surprisingly Effective Car Salesmen
With the Redskins improbably advancing to the NFL's Final Eight, we're obviously going to be ratcheting up the Clinton Portis coverage even more than we already have, if that's not terrifying enough for you. As a little appetizer, though, we present you this gaggle of advertisements for Easterns A...
Fiction Is Actually Stranger Than Kobe's Truth
Further showcasing the almost impressive casual racism of the porn industry, a reader sends us the link to this very special porn film: Tobey Bryan's Backcourt Violation, from our classy friends at Hustler....
NFL Playoff Roundup: Riiiiipppppp!
• Honestly, we know this was covered all weekend, but man, that Carson Palmer thing was the worst playoff moment we can remember. We think Buzzsaw That Is The Arizona Cardinals have it tough; Bengals fans finally get in the playoffs, and two plays in, their Pro Bowl QB tears an ACL and MCL. (Quest...
Panthers vs. Giants - 4th Quarter
• If Ken Lucas and Marlon McCree played for the Giants, Eli Manning would be on fire. Unfortunately for Eli, however, they are Panthers. McCree did do the Giants a favor, though, and run about 20 yards backwards after the interception. But that probably just means DeShaun Foster has more yardage ...
Panthers vs. Giants - 3rd Quarter
• The Giants brought out Lawrence Taylor to be honored at halftime. This could provide some inspiration for the G-Men. Particularly if LT brought his pipe with him....
Panthers vs. Giants - 2nd Quarter
• After Carolina continued to gash the Giants up the middle with the run, Steve Smith got open over the middle for a touchdown. 7-0 Carolina. He followed it up with a snow angel in the endzone, and the any signifigance or entertainment value is lost on me....
Panthers vs. Giants - 1st Quarter
• The first half of the first quarter is timid and uneventful, but Carolina's settled into a little bit of a groove, moving the ball with relative ease. DeShaun Foster is gashing them a little bit, and Steve Smith is picking up yards on little bubble screens....
Redskins vs. Bucs - 4th quarter
• Mike Patrick just said the words, "An exciting muff."...
Redskins vs. Bucs - 3rd quarter
• That's how you get back into a game. First, the Bucs force a 3-and-out with a sack on third down, then a nice punt return, then a very slick offensive drive capped by a Simms TD on a bootleg. That's quality work you did at halftime, Jon Gruden. 17-10 Redskins....
Redskins vs. Bucs - 2nd quarter
• The Redskins front 7 is playing very well, keeping Cadillac Williams in check. In essence, they're putting the game into the hands of Chris Simms. • Tampa Bay gets on the board with a Matt Bryant FG, making the score 14-3 Redskins. This leads to the positively infuriating "Score, Commercial, Kic...
Redskins vs. Bucs - 1st quarter
• Anthony Becht and LaVar Arrington seem to have different levels of respect for the recent accomplishments of their alma maters. Becht announced himself as being from "The 2006 Sugar Bowl Champion West Virginia Mountaineers," while Arrington said he was from "North Hills High." • Chris Hovan has ...
Elsewhere in College Basketball...
• #5 Florida 90, Georgia 72. Gators push it to 14-0 by hammering the Bulldogs. Currently, there's not a ranked team on Florida's schedule other than Kentucky, and I'm not sure if they should count. • #12 Maryland 70, Miami 84. Miami hits 12-of-19 three balls to beat the Terps. Nice win, but I'll nee...
Illinois Joins The Ranks Of The Defeated
That nasty Iowa defense spent the day sweating Dee Brown into a 2-of-14 performance from field, holding him to just six points and polishing off a 63-48 Iowa victory....
Kentucky Pounded By Kansas
Unlike everyone else, Kansas and Kentucky have refused to play within their conferences today, and in fact, Kentucky appears to have refused to play basketball at all. They're getting absolutely pounded by the Jayhawks, 73-44 with about a minute left to play....
Marcus Vick Experience Shut Down For Safety Reasons
I share the view held by the Wizard of Odds that former Virginia Tech QB Marcus Vick's lack of remorse, or even any kind of acknowledgement of wrongdoing, is a little troubling. "It's not a big deal," he says....
Week In Deadspin: We Never Once Said "Vin-SANITY." So You Know.
• Hey, there was a moderately enjoyable college football game this week. • Clinton Portis is the man, and, in case you were wondering, his mom rules too. • Support your local athletes, always, particularly if you're Stuart Scott. • Ichiro could be a killer, you know. • So you know, this guy is not...
Playoff Pants Party: Panthers Vs. Giants
We think Tom Coughlin freaks us out a little bit. In our nightmares, when we've done something vaguely wrong that we don't understand but know that it was terrible, Coughlin's the type of guy who shows up in our dreams, screaming at us, like the drill sergeant gym teacher in "Beavis & Butthead." ...
Playoff Pants Party: Jaguars Vs. Patriots
This is the late game tomorrow night, which means, if you plan your day correctly, you should be properly hammered enough by halftime to confuse that dude in the corner with some ex-girlfriend who did you wrong. (Or, for female and non-traditional male readers, uh ... OK, we're not sure what the ...