kane Page 15 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Report: The Blackhawks Have Suggested That Patrick Kane Seek Counseling
Three weeks back, we shared with you a reconstruction of Patrick Kane's drunken Cinco de Mayo weekend in Wisconsin. Kane, sources told us, was thrown out of bars and frat houses, for, among other things, choking a girl and making anti-Semitic comments. The cops were involved, at one point, but he wa...

Once Again Northwestern Wins Nth Women's Lacrosse Title in N+1 Years
The women's lacrosse team from Northwestern University out-lacrossed the women's lacrosse team from Syracuse University on Sunday to win the program's seventh national title in eight years, a laudable feat of consistent ass-kicking that becomes all the more impressive when you consider the key word ...

Here Are The Best Entries In Our Drunk, Sulking Patrick Kane Photoshop Contest
This fine entry kicked off our Patrick Kane photoshop contest, but somehow we knew our wise readers had more in store. And you did not disappoint. I've picked the best ones here—with special commendation for our winner at the end—because we can cram only so many images into a gallery, but keep in mi...

Can You Beat This Entry In Our Patrick Kane Photoshop Contest?
One enterprising reader—VidaBlueManGroup—decided to kick off a Drunk Patrick Kane photoshop contest. I think he won it already, by dropping Kaner's Charlie Brown walk into Abbey Road—but we're hungry for a runner-up. We prefer doctored photos that use sulking Kaner, as opposed to party Kaner, but we...

Reconstructing Patrick Kane's Drunken Weekend In Madison, With Eyewitness Testimony
On Monday we showed you photos of a soused Patrick Kane in Madison, Wis., and then we asked you if you knew more about what happened while Kane was there. We had heard some bad stories—that Kane supposedly choked a woman, that Kane supposedly said anti-Semitic things—and we wanted to know if other p...

Do You Know Any More About Patrick Kane's Drunken Saturday In Wisconsin?
Earlier today, we gleefully shared with you a compendium of photos of a blotto Patrick Kane. He was having good, clean fun at Saturday's Mifflin Street block party in Madison, or so we thought, anyway. We've since heard some things that don't reflect so well on Kaner. If you were at the Kollege Klub...

Patrick Kane's Offseason Drinking Regimen Is Off To A Great Start
Sometimes it's easy to forget that Blackhawks star Patrick Kane is only 23 years old. Wait, did I say "sometimes... easy to forget?" I meant "always... impossible to forget." Here's Kaner being Kaner, as Kaner does, in Madison, Wis., for Cinco de Mayo on Saturday. Evidently he was more welcome than ...

Cricketer Takes 86 MPH Ball To The Crotch, Cracking His Cup
Kane Williamson was a hero on the fifth day of New Zealand's test against South Africa, and not just because he recorded a century and salvaged a draw after entering the afternoon facing down an enormous deficit. Early on he took a ball directly to the groin, a delivery that split his cup—or as pe...

Let's All Get Wasted At Patrick Kane's Coming-Out Party
Sidney Crosby suffered a neck injury, we were told. It was supposedly separate from his concussion issues, and announced by someone with the ominous title of neurological spine specialist, but we were reassured that it was fully healed. Nothing about that terse Penguins release was reassuring. Crosb...

Patrick Kane Proves That Superman Truly Is From Chicago
Your morning roundup for Jan. 29, the day we got a little bit extra out of the ATM. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors. Image via....

Please Kaner, Don't Hurt 'Em
When we received a reminder from the NHL about last night's NHL 36, a docu-reality show featuring Patrick Kane, the nice PR person predicted that we would make fun of him. (I can't imagine why!) Before we had a chance, Kane scored a shootout clincher that makes us want to take back every joke we'v...

Patrick Kane Pulled Off A Perfect Spin-O-Rama Assist Last Night
The Hawks beat the Ducks 3-2 in a shutout in Chicago last night, and Patrick Kane, our favorite Buffalo boozehound, provided the prettiest play of the game. This assist to Marian Hossa tied it up in the second period. Kane later told reporters that he'd discussed the move with Hawks great Denis Sa...

On Patrick Kane's Injury
The Blackhawks announced that Kane will undergo surgery to repair a fractured wrist. We were inundated with requests to investigate, because PK is a favorite around these parts....

Weak Grounder To Second Starts Nutso Minor League Brawl
Your gladiators: the Spokane Indians and Vancouver Canadian, Class A affiliates of the Rangers and Blue Jays respectively. Your catalyst: I dunno, probably someone saying something about someone's momma....

Patrick Kane Does Something Really Nice
PK showed up at a 10-year-old fan's floor hockey birthday, because he's an all-around decent guy. See Patrick? We love you! Please come back to us, Patrick. [Chicago Tribune]...

Beer In The Stanley Cup Looks Like Piss: More From The Patrick Kane Collection
Would you believe it's been a year, to the week, of the Blackhawks capturing the most famous trophy in all of professional sports? To remind you what Vancouver and Boston are playing for, here are a couple new photos from Patrick Kane's time with the Stanley Cup. ...

Patrick Kane's Offseason Begins With A Black Eye, Taking A Girl Home From A Club
Oh Kaner. We take a lot of shit for giving you shit, but you keep giving us shit to give you shit for....

Patrick Kane Needs A Drink
Your morning roundup for April 27, the day we let the idiots drive the national agenda....

Dueling Mullets Welcome You To Day One Of The NHL Playoffs
Your morning roundup for April 13, the day Justin Bieber reminded us that the Middle East is still fucked up....

Chicago's Marty Turco Uses Bench Time To Place Bets With Fans, Write "Turco Rules!" On $5 Bills
Marty Turco signed a one-year contract with Chicago last summer and expected to start in net for the Blackhawks. But for much of the season, he's served as Corey Crawford's back-up and has gotten well-acquainted with the pine. He hasn't started a game since Feb. 11. So Turco's now looking for new so...