lakers Page 69 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
The Clashing Of The Titanic Titans
The NBA Closer is written by Matt McHale, who is in no way related to Kevin McHale and who has taken the necessary legal steps to ensure that it stays that way. When he's not screaming in soulless rage at the merciless Pagan gods, he can be found making fart jokes at Basketbawful. Enjoy!...
Lakers Come Up A Little Short
Ha, nice shorts! It was 1980s retrospective night at the Staples Center on Sunday, the Lakers stylin' with short shorts, assistant coach Kurt Rambis sporting a fake mustache, and the Laker Girls wearing spandex. No word as to whether Nicholson dropped 25 pounds and came dressed as The Joker. (A tre...
Today's Episode: Isiah Has An Epiphany
Skeets is off celebrating Christmas Eve the way that all Canadians do; pantsless and migrating with a herd of elk. So your NBA Closer today is being written by United States Secretary of Housing and Urban Development Alphonso Jackson. Do enjoy....
Battle Of The Stars
The NBA Closer is written by our own Canadian weekend maestro J.E. Skeets. When he's not busy scouring the box scores or spelunking, he can be heard on The Basketball Jones daily podcast. Enjoy!...
Ring In The New Year With Kwame Brown
We can't think of any athlete more worthy of a special VIP table than Kwame Brown; it seems the perfect pre-Rose Bowl palate cleanser. But we hope no one brings a cake....
All For Naught
The NBA Closer is written by our own Canadian weekend maestro J.E. Skeets. When he's not busy scouring the box scores, he can be heard on The Basketball Jones daily podcast. Huzzah!...
What Group of People Will Phil Jackson Offend Next?
AJ Daulerio's Cultural Oddsmaker runs every Friday. Email him to let him know what you think....
Phil Jackson Just Can't Quit You
Sure, Phil Jackson's post-game comments on Tuesday were controversial. But the cinematography was spectacular, and we say he deserves an Oscar. Wait, what? After losing to the Spurs on Tuesday, Jackson said "We call this a 'Brokeback Mountain' game because there's so much penetration and kickouts." ...
Big Ten Network Airs Another Mind-Dissolving Upset (So Nobody Saw It)
Well it's about damn time a Big Ten favorite loses their first game of the season to a championship-caliber team from a smaller division. Grand Valley State, who made it to last year's Division II Elite Eight round (only to lose on a buzzer-beater), took an exhibition game way too seriously and won ...
Please Give A Warm Forum Welcome To Day One Of The NBA Season
Welcome the return of your daily recap of NBA "action."...
The Journalists Is Smart And Diligent
How absurd has the the Kobe Bryant story become? There was a rather large media kerfuffle at Lakers practice yesterday revolving around whether or not Kobe had cleaned out his locker. It turned out that he hadn't cleaned out his locker; he had merely cleaned it. Say what you will about the status of...
Please, No More Kobe Bryant
We're gonna just man up and beg the Lakers here: Please, please, trade Kobe Bryant. We don't care where. Chicago? Phoenix? Dallas? We don't know, and we don't care. Just get it done, and fast....
Yep: The Kobe Video Guys Are Dorks
This site claims to have pictures of the two guys responsible for that increasingly lame "Kobe Video Rant", smiling with Kobe during happier times. (In other words, right before he spouted off and caused them to think you could sell 25-second video clips on the Web.) It's not confirmed that's reall...
Great Moments In Web Profit Making
Let's think, for a moment, of just how long a timespan 24 seconds. It's how long it takes a shotclock to run down. It's how long it takes us to type two sentences. It's how long it takes Elijah Dukes to type two words on a text message. And it's how long the supposedly CONTROVERSIAL Kobe Bryant vide...
Kobe's Still Feeling Grumpy
If the Los Angeles Lakers do indeed plan on making some moves to surround Kobe Bryant with some more talent, they might want to speed the process along. Kobe's hanging out in Barcelona, and he's not getting any happier....
If Kobe Can't Trust His Bodyguard, Whom Can He Trust?
We don't know why more athlete/celebrity bodyguards don't write tell-alls. (It's entirely possible they don't know how to write.) It seems like they'd have all the best stories, going to the places no one else is allowed to touch....