layoffs Page 67 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Cody Parkey's Double-Doink Was Tipped
This is what the aftermath sounded like to Cody Parkey:...
Cody Parkey Double-Doinked And Kept The Nick Foles Magic Alive<em></em>
With ten seconds left in the game against Philadelphia, Bears kicker Cody Parkey somehow hit the goalpost and the crossbar on a 43-yard field goal attempt that would have eliminated the Eagles from the playoffs. The double-doinked kick was not good, and big-dicked god-king Nick Foles survived anothe...
Bears Complete 30-Yard Pass For No Gain As Officials Recover Fumble
The Eagles-Bears game got weird right before halftime when Eagles cornerback Cre’Von Leblanc wrested the ball from Bears receiver Anthony Miller in an impressive display of strength. The play was initially ruled an incompletion, but the inhuman standard of slow motion showed that Miller caught the b...
Refs Cost Chargers And Ravens Touchdowns On Consecutive Plays
A bizarre sequence came to the cosmically correct ending in the Chargers-Ravens game. Refs and replay officials arguably blew at least four separate calls at the 1-yard-line before the Chargers finally punched it in for a 20-3 lead....
The Seahawks Forgot They Had Russell Wilson Until It Was Too Late<em></em>
After an offseason roster purge, the Seahawks put together a playoff push even though they ran the ball more than they threw it—an unconventional approach in today’s NFL. Russell Wilson thrived nonetheless, thanks to his mastery of the deep ball and his ability to throw with unreal accuracy into tig...
The Ravens Fumbled Three Times In Their First Eight Offensive Plays
The Ravens did not have the best start to their postseason, at least on offense....
The Colts' Rookies Blocked The Texans' Stars Straight Into Hell
Jadeveon Clowney is one of the most talented athletes in all of American sports. Here’s Colts rookie guard Quenton Nelson stopping him cold and then backing him up two full yards before tossing him to the ground: ...
What The Hell Is Jim Irsay Saying Here?
Here’s my best attempt at transcribing the speech that maniacal Colts owner Jim Irsay gave after his team’s wild-card win over the Texans:...
The Seahawks Will Have To Finish Out A Playoff Game Without A Kicker
Seahawks kicker Seabastian Janikowski injured his leg on a missed 57-yard field goal attempt at the end of the first half of tonight’s defensive struggle against the Cowboys, and Seattle has apparently decided that they don’t trust star punter Michael Dickson to attempt even extra points....
Cowboys WR Allen Hurns Leaves Game On Stretcher After Gruesome Leg Injury
In the first quarter of tonight’s playoff game, Cowboys receiver Allen Hurns was tackled by Seahawks safety Bradley McDougald. As Hurns was fighting to stay upright, McDougald fell onto Hurns’s left leg and broke it....
The Houston Texans Are Pure Frauds, No Matter Who's Playing Quarterback
Two interminable streaks were on the line today in Houston: the Texans’ unbroken history of playoff humiliations, and Deshaun Watson not having lost a game by more than one score since high school. The fragrance of ass that exudes from the Texans and Bill O’Brien was more powerful by far, as the Col...
This Is The Only Way The Texans Can Stop The Colts From Scoring
The Colts have a 21-0 lead and a ridiculous 20 first downs at halftime against the Texans, and it would likely be 35-0 if not for two plays. ...
The New MLS Playoff Format Is A Disaster In Waiting
In its effort to continue to tweak every single thing imaginable, MLS announced on Monday that there will be a new playoff format starting in 2019. The league is doing away with the European-influenced two-legged playoffs in favor of a single-elimination tournament, akin to March Madness....
DC United's Nick DeLeon Scores Clutch Game-Tying Goal, Then Chokes Away Decisive Penalty Kick
Well this was all very dramatic. DC United were down 2–1 in the 116th minute of Thursday night’s knockout round match against Columbus Crew, until Nick DeLeon ripped home a clutch equalizer from the edge of the box off a blown clearance....
David Price Has Earned Some Peace And Quiet
Every player’s happy to win a championship, but David Price might be the happiest of them all. He’s had to put up with a lot of shit this season. After he pitched seven-plus innings of one-run ball as the Red Sox won Game 5 and closed out the World Series, those criticisms have been practically all ...
Activists Display Huge "Trans People Deserve To Live" Banner During World Series
During Game 5 of the World Series on Sunday night in Los Angeles, a group in the left field stands unfurled a massive banner that said, “Trans People Deserve To Live.” The website Into reports that the banner was snuck into the stadium by the TransLatin@ Coalition, an organization based in L.A. tha...
Steve Pearce Had A Long, Strange Trip To World Series MVP
Steve Pearce is used to having only a short time to make an impression. He is a power-hitting first baseman who hits lefties, so he spends a lot of time on the bench, and a lot of time moving around the majors. The 35-year-old has played for eight different organizations in his 12 seasons, including...
The Goddamn Red Sox Won The Goddamn World Series
The Boston Red Sox beat the Los Angeles Dodgers 5-1 in Game 5 of the World Series, making them world champions for the fourth time this century. This is piss....
Walker Buehler Is A Goddamn Stud
Max Muncy might have been the hero for the Dodgers in the marathon that was Game 3 of the World Series, but rookie pitcher Walker Buehler was the real star. The 24-year-old showed on Friday that he’s ready to be the next great Los Angeles postseason hero in his seven-inning shutout performance....
Fucking Max Muncy Won The Longest World Series Game In History
It’s really tough to feel sympathy for goddamn Red Sox fans, but man. Staying up until 3:30 a.m. eastern time only to see minor-league journeyman and Oakland A’s flameout Max Muncy steal a game Boston should have had five innings earlier has got to be rooooooough....