lies Page 78 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Los Angeles Dodgers Officially Absorb Chase Utley Into Their Bottomless Money Pit
The long-awaited Chase Utley trade has finally been consummated, with the Phillies announcing that he will be going to the Dodgers for minor leaguers Darnell Sweeney and John Richy, as well as cash considerations....

Cole Hamels Traded To Rangers, Phillies Get Top Prospects In Return
It turns out that Cole Hamels’s final start after 10 seasons as a Philly was indeed a no-hitter, as he has been traded to the Texas Rangers for a gaggle of prospects. As reported by Jeff Passan and others, here is what the deal looks like: ...

The Nationals Are Kind Of Boning Drew Storen
The Washington Nationals just made a trade that should help fix their biggest weakness—the back end of the bullpen—by bringing in Jonathan Papelbon to be the new closer. Papelbon will take the job from current closer Drew Storen, who will slide into a set-up role and give the Nats a great 1-2 punch ...

Drake's New Diss Track Comes With A Great Sports Troll
Drake and Meek Mill are beefing because Meek claimed that Drake doesn’t write his own raps. This morning, Drake released his second diss track aimed at Meek, and it’s pretty good, as diss tracks go, but what I really like about it is the cover art:...

Cole Hamels Throws First Career No-Hitter
For the first time in nearly 50 years, the Chicago Cubs have been no-hit after the soon-to-be-traded Cole Hamels struck out 13 en route to his first career no-no....

Aaron Nola Gives Up First Career Home Run To Opposing Pitcher
The baseball season is 162 games long and every possible number is tracked, leading to quirky statistical anomalies. These aren’t particularly insightful or important but they’re fun, and part of what make baseball, baseball. ...

This Dude Scores A Full-On Volley From Damn Near The Halfway Line
First thing first: Check out this goal. It’s totally nuts....

Love Ya, Frenchy
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This Moment Of Phillies Ineptitude Brought To You By The Bullpen Phone
How bad were the Phillies against Baltimore tonight? So bad they had to bring in Jeff Francoeur to pitch. Except that Francoeur couldn’t get anybody out, so pitching coach Bob McClure tried to call down to the bullpen to get a real pitcher up. One problem: the bullpen phone was off the hook after Ph...

Ruben Amaro Jr.: How Bad A GM Do You Think I Am?
Last night, CSN Philadelphia’s Jim Salisbury reported that the Mariners are “checking in” on speedy Phillies outfielder Ben Revere. This makes sense: Revere has been squeezed out of his natural left-field role, and despite a down year, is still miles better than what Seattle has been getting from it...

AMERICA BEAT GERMANY, WE ARE GIANT KILLERS, WHO WANTS NEXT, HUH?!
Last week wasn’t a fluke! Earlier today wasn’t a fluke! We still got the magic, baby!...

Mix Diskerud Bicycle-Kicks In Goal; USMNT Is Kinda Hanging With Germany
Hmmm, the USMNT maintaining possession, playing it out from the back, overloading zones with intelligent off-ball movement, good first touches, and a tying goal that wasn’t totally against the run of play while facing one of the world’s best? Maybe we were on to something......

The Phillies' GM Is Sick Of All These Fans Who Just "Bitch And Complain"
Phillies GM Ruben Amaro has constructed a team that has put together back-to-back 73-win seasons, and with the club’s current record sitting at 19-28, it doesn’t look like things are going to get better this year. And yet, Amaro would really like for all those disillusioned Phillies fans out there t...


Phillies Catcher Accidentally Pegs Pitcher In Throat
Thank the capabilities of slow-mo these days, because just seconds after Phillies catcher Cameron Rupp flung a ball right into pitcher Sean O’Sullivan’s throat, the broadcast immediately showed two exceptional angles of “Man Getting Hit By Baseball.”...

Phillies Fan Rips Home Run Ball Away From Old Lady
We’ve been over the ethics of who deserves baseballs that make their way off the field of play before (consult this flowchart) and so we feel it necessary to illustrate this incident from yesterday’s Diamondbacks-Phillies game, in which a Phillyfan pushes aside an elderly woman to grab Maikel Franco...

Grizzlies Hold Pregame "Moment Of Song" In Memory Of B.B. King
Memphis legend B.B. King died last night, and given his importance as a cultural icon to the Blues capital, it was a given the Grizzlies would do some sort of tribute before tonight’s Game 6 against the Warriors. But the occasion didn’t call for the standard moment of silence; instead, the Grizzlies...

The Warriors Are Cruel
I won’t presume to know how Grizzlies fans were feeling during the first few minutes of last night’s Game 5 loss to the Warriors. It was certainly too early for them to be feeling confident, but the Grizzlies being up by double digits early, with Marc Gasol and Zach Randolph doing their thing and th...

Dipshit Mets Fan Throws Beer At Grady Sizemore
Here’s a dipshit Mets fan spending $12 in a futile attempt to disrupt Phillies right fielder Grady Sizemore from fielding a ball in the fourth inning at Citi Field today. Stop wasting beer, dipshit!...