lies Page 79 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Jonathan Papelbon Talks Horses And Dick-Sucking Holes
Whenever the Red Sox and Phillies play, someone sticks a recorder in Jonathan Papelbon’s face and uses his thoughts on both teams as an angle to get through the series. (Shane Victorino just isn’t as brash.) Before Wednesday’s game, the Phillies closer was direct to the Boston Globe about his conne...
Jeff Green Dunk Annihilates Entire Nation
Jeff Green threw down a dunk during tonight’s game against the Wizards that certainly shook anyone and everything associated with Washington, D.C. that we should expect to awake tomorrow to pure and unadulterated anarchy....
Andros Townsend Waves Hi To Media Hater After Great International Goal
Andros Townsend isn't a great player, but then again, England aren't a great team, so it isn't too much of a surprise that the Spurs winger was called up during this international break, nor that he managed to blast home the tying goal in today's 1-1 draw against Italy. Well, not a surprise to us....
Phillies To Start Serving Hard Liquor And Wine To Fans
Good news for Phillies fans who would like to increase their chances at catching vomit spray from some drunk goon at a ballgame this year: For the first time ever, the team will be selling wine and cocktails on the main concourse at Citizens Bank Park. ...
Brek Shea Pounds A Free Kick Into The Top Corner To Give USMNT Lead
Ooooh, there's that boy Brek Shea! Maybe he did learn something on those cold, rainy Wednesday nights with Stoke's U21 team, after all!...
USMNT Felled By Hat-Trick Hero Nicklas Bendtner, Who Still Sucks
For the first time this year—at least the first time we'd like to remember—a fit and strong USMNT squad got some run. The opponent was Denmark, stiff competition to be sure. So while USMNT fans could've justifiably been cautiously pleased with the 2-1 lead our boys took into the final 10 minutes of ...
My Compost Bin Has Been Overrun By Fruit Flies, Send Help
Jolie Kerr is a cleaning expert and advice columnist. She'll be here every week helping to answer your filthiest questions. Are you dirty? Check the Squalor Archive for assistance. Are you still dirty? Email her....
Andrew Hammond Wins Again, Raises Hamburger In Triumph
Andrew Hammond's story is the best in the NHL right now, and the Senators are pushing for a miracle. But I can't shake the sense that the headline here ought to be "Magic hamburger doesn't explode after being thrown onto the ice." ...
Crazy End To Big Sky Semifinal Sees Game-Winning Layup, Scuffle
The ending to last night’s Big Sky Conference tournament semifinal between Montana and Northern Arizona was insane, seeing a game-winning layup, an idiot on the field, and a scuffle between coaches. Here’s an annotation of what you’re seeing above: ...
Jay Williams Misremembers Playing Duke-UNC Game Against Vince Carter
Jay Williams attempted to explain the experience of playing in a Duke-UNC rivalry game to ESPN's audience tonight, though in his attempt to name-drop some of the Tar Heels players he faced as a member of the Blue Devils, he mentioned Vince Carter—a player who was already in the NBA by the time Willi...
RGIII Is Not Kissing A Butt In This Picture, Believe It Or Butt
Quick! Look at this picture for just a second and then look away! ...
Report: Henrik Lundqvist Out At Least A Month After Freak Injury
Rangers goalie Henrik Lundqvist will miss a month or more, according to the Post's Larry Brooks, after continuing to experience symptoms from taking a puck in the throat during a Jan. 31 game against Carolina....
Carter Hutton Preserves Win With Save Of The Year Contender
There is something in the water that is causing an epidemic of diving stick saves, and it is glorious. Here is Carter Hutton firmly declaring his candidacy for save of the year with this amazing reflexive swat, keeping Nashville's 4-3 lead intact late in the third period. ...
44 Lies Roger Goodell Told In His Press Conference Today
"It has been a season of amazing competition, challenges and real progress."...
Dominik Hasek Was So Good
The Sabres will retire Dominik Hasek's number tonight, two months after his induction into the Hall of Fame. He is one of the greatest goaltenders of all time—very arguably the best of an era that featured the likes of Brodeur and Roy—yet it's nearly impossible to properly convey sustained netmindin...
Hey, Guy, Just Shake Marc Gasol's Hand
After Tuesday night's game against the Hawks, Grizzlies center Marc Gasol was giving daps to fans as he headed into the locker room. One fan did not want any of Gasol's daps, though, and pulled the ol' pull-the-hand-back-and-rub-your-hair handshake prank....
Tony Allen's Son Barfed All Over Him
Today, Tony Allen let us all know that his son barfed on his face. He even provided photographic evidence. Twitter is a beautiful service....
Vince Carter's Old-Man Dunk Makes Me Happy
Let's be honest, this probably isn't a bloggable dunk if it had been done by, say, Terrence Ross or Gerald Green. A good-but-not-great dunk is a little more noteworthy, however, when it's 37-year-old Vince Carter throwing it down, showing us all that sometimes—even when you're a shell of your former...
The Year In Sports Fans: The Good, The Bad, And The Bills
Sports fans were all over the place in 2014. There were fights, babies, whimsical drunks, scary drunks, sports, dicks, and butts. Take a look back at some of the most notable fans....