life Page 27 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
The Real Purpose Of Vine: Owning Your Sister At Mini-Stick Hockey
Four days ago, a young man whose name we do not know created a Vine account and named it "Ministicks." His first post flatly stated the purpose of the account: "First post. I will post some ministick highlights."...
Naked-Ass Cowboy Goes For A Stroll On Snowy Highway
I'm going to be honest, you aren't going to get a very long look at at the naked-ass cowboy in the video above, but I think your experience will be better for it. It's like a Bigfoot sighting: One second you're looking at nothing but a snowy Detroit highway, and in the next you're getting a brief gl...
How To Cook A Bunch Of Good Food For The Super Bowl Party
So the Super™ Bowl® is here, and that means some sucker—maybe even you!—will be hosting a Super™ Bowl® party which they will feel weirdly obligated to refer to as a "Big Game" party, because the NFL likes to sue people for liking it. You will have to bring something to this shindig—especially if ...
Hey, Get A Load Of This Evil Doctor
The Washington Post has a profile today of Dr. Jack Wolfson, an Arizona cardiologist and holistic medicine, uh, doer or whatever, who's made something of a name for himself by providing a flimsy, fraudulent rime of expertish cover to the reprehensible, morally criminal anti-vaccination crowd in the ...
What Is This Batshit Anti-Nike, Anti-Kevin Durant Website?
This is just one of the many completely insane image macros that can currently be found at townofloveokc.publishpath.com. From what I can gather, this site is run by a crazy person who believes two things very strongly: Nike is an evil, Godless corporation, and Kevin Durant is the devil....
How To Bake Bay Scallops, And Prove That Size Isn't Everything
Seems like bay scallops get kind of a raw deal, doesn't it? At my local purveyor of seafoods, the big honkin' fist-sized sea scallops get a place of honor in the glass display case, while the bay scallops are stuck over in the freezer across the way, packed by the dozens into grim plastic bags, f...
David Blatt Plunked By Errant Pass
Cleveland handily dispatched Chicago tonight for their third straight win, continuing to right the ship after going 1-7 with that LeBron James fellow out injured. But while the heat on coach David Blatt's seat has somewhat dissipated—and he's not been moved around by James in a few nights—his life i...
Hey, Can Someone Help This Guy With The Iron Rod Stuck In His Head?
According to the Associated Press, this scene took place in a gas station in a small town in New Zealand. No need to panic or anything, but it would be really chill if someone could just, you know, help this guy out with the whole rod-in-the-head situation....
Bathroom Sex Had At Bull-Riding Event
A tipster who attended a Professional Bull Riders event at Madison Square Garden this weekend sends along the above photo. Allow him to describe the scene:...
Why Tonight's Heavyweight Title Fight Shouldn't Be On The Level
While professional boxing unquestionably often involves two fighters hitting each other as hard as possible in order to win their match, it also often puts business first. It looks as if a lot of X's and O's are being moved around in two upcoming heavyweight title bouts, presumably as long-range s...
How To Make Sausage And Peppers: A Guide For The Stir Crazy
This column originally ran on February 16, 2013. However, I've been laid up with strep throat for the past few days, so I'm resurrecting it, both because I haven't been able to cook at all this week, and also because this is what I will cook and eat as soon as I am able to swallow things again....
David Moyes Hops Into Stands, Enjoys Some Chips After Being Red Carded
It looks like the air in the Basque mountains has done David Moyes a world of good. No longer the grumpy looking human wrinkle he was for much of his time with Manchester United, Moyes has performed pretty much exactly as hoped with Real Sociedad. Today he even had some goodnatured fun after get...
Report: Cavaliers Players Ignore, Openly Gripe About David Blatt
The Cleveland Cavaliers, with LeBron James back and their starting five finally intact, got smoked by the Phoenix Suns last night. The team is now 19-20, the worst any team with LeBron on it has been this late in the season since his rookie year. And after the game, ESPN's Brian Windhorst dropped a ...
LeBron Moves Coach Blatt Aside To Attend To Grown Folks' Business
This is just David Blatt's existence now isn't it, suffering a long string of indignities and being treated more like a rookie player than a rookie coach? One day he is forced to clarify his comments after saying Kevin Love is not a max contract player, the next LeBron James is pushing him (likely t...
How To Survive An Office Meeting: A Guide For Sad Drones
One of the terrors of the modern office job is the meeting, wherein everyone in a particular business unit of a company converges to sit around a sad, grey conference table to recite terms like report and action item and iteration and suboptimal at each other in the hope that these will conjure, m...
Train Station Invaded By Substance That Probably Came From Aliens
The picture above, via ABC 7's Ben Bradley, depicts some shit currently going down at Union Station in Chicago....
Man In "No, Seriously, I Have Drugs" Shirt Charged With Drug Possession
Florida man John Balmer was arrested at a Kmart and charged with possession of meth; it appears Pasco County police might have been tipped off by the 50-year-old's shirt. ...
Worst Damn Knife Thrower Nearly Kills His Assistant
This happened on some sort of Lithuanian talent show, and I very nearly broke out into a cold sweat while watching it. ...
How Many Days Are In A Week? Internet Steakheads Go To War
The brain is not a muscle. For proof of that, we turn to the commenting forums of Bodybuilding.com....
How To Roast Butternut Squash, Which Is Phallic And Fantastic
There's the versatility of, say, a boneless, skinless chicken breast—it tastes bland and uninteresting pretty much no matter what you do with it, so it "goes" with everything, like gustatory khaki—and then there's the versatility of the butternut squash, which is so outrageously goddamn good that yo...