life Page 54 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
That's Good Parenting
It's 32 degrees in Minneapolis tonight, and there are two children at Target Field without shirts on....
Alleged Pimpette Now Suing Fred Davis For Alleging She's A Pimpette
The Makini Chaka-Fred Davis beef is the beef that keeps on giving....
Epic Air-Guitaring Giants Fan Is Epic
So, you think you know how to party? Well, this guy knows how to party harder....
Report: Naked Man Ransacks SPEED Network Offices After Break-In
Police in Charlotte said the nude dude broke into the building sometime this morning. He tore stuff from the walls, dumped trash cans on the floor, and broke trophies by knocking them over. He then dashed outside and started running down the street before being apprehended. Also? "A SPEED security g...
Failure Is An Option, Or Why You'll Always Be A Loser And That's OK: Recovering Fatass Soundtrack
A weekly look at the iPod of a regular dude trying to run himself out of an early grave....
How To Make A Quiche: A Guide For 'Mericans
There's nothing wrong with quiche that couldn't be fixed by just calling it goddamn Omelet Pie. Slap an off-putting, unappetizing (keesh—it sounds like an onomatopoeic rendering of a rabid vampire bat crashing through the windshield of your car to attack your neck, oh God my neck, get it off getito...
Using Weed To Pay For A Cab Ride In Front Of Cops Is Never A Good Idea
Just, you know, FYI. Because Michael Medvec, a 23-year-old Philly resident, tried it last Friday night, when he didn't have the eight bucks he needed to pay the fare back to his apartment. Let's read along with the Philadelphia Daily News, which got the deets from Philly police captain Brian Korn:...
Help! What Can I Do About My Stinky Feet?
Jolie Kerr is a cleaning expert and advice columnist. She'll be here every other week helping to answer your filthiest questions. Are you dirty? Email her....
Did You Know? Deer Fight Like Idiots
Mike Simundson, a photographer for Keloland TV, captured this deer fight in a Sioux Falls, S.D., park last week. The technique: slap the shit out of each other and slowly back your opponent into a set of bleacher seats. You'll never lose another deer fight again....
It's An Enthusiastic Crowd At Rogers Centre Tonight, Especially These Two Blue Jays Fans Who Got A Bit Handjobby
Blowjob pantomimes are so passé. I mean, you can find them in hockey, in baseball, and even college football. For the new wave, we must look to Canada....
There Is No Such Thing As "Sweating Out A Hangover": A Recovering Fatass's Weekly iPod Playlist
A weekly look at the iPod of a regular dude trying to run himself out of an early grave....
How To Make Baked Ziti: A Guide For Heroes Willing To Eat All That Cheese
There come those times in each person's life when you really just want to eat All The Cheese. When you're drinking wine, or when you've had a dreary day and are stressed out and could use something indulgent to liven things up a little bit—or, really, any other time you happen not to be dead—man, e...
Golfer Jason Dufner Appears To Be Having A Lot Of Fun Visiting These Kids In Dallas
Jason Dufner won the 2012 Byron Nelson Championship in Irving, Texas, and today he was back in the area, in Dallas, for the kick-off luncheon for the 2013 event. And, from the looks of it, he had a blast....
How I Trick My Brain Into Thinking Running Isn't The Worst: A Recovering Fatass's Weekly iPod Playlist
A weekly look at the iPod of a regular dude trying to run himself out of an early grave....
Four High School Basketball Players Suspended For "Their Involvement In Pouring Urine" In The Other Team's Water Cooler
Great euphemisms in this one, a story about a basketball player peeing, into a cup probably, and her friends pouring the pee into their rival's water cooler prior to a basketball game between the schools....
How To Grill Chicken Breasts: A Guide For Heretics
The boneless, skinless chicken breast is the totemic foodstuff of the health-obsessed, because of the nutritional potency of chicken, because of the relatively low fat content of the boneless, skinless breast relative to other nutrient-dense animal proteins, and because in 99 percent of its preparat...
Those Plucky FGCU Basketball Players Live On An Actual Beach
You may think "Hollywood Upstairs Medical College" or "Ponzi scheme" when you hear "Florida Gulf Coast University," but that's not fair: FGCU—which looks like what you see above—is very much a real place, with documented students, and classes, and dorms and stuff. Indeed, that picture, provided by C...
Supposedly Dead MMA Fighter Robs Gun Store From Beyond The Grave
Today in great ledes, this one courtesy of the Associated Press: ...