liv Page 45 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Mario Balotelli Does Helium Voice Trick, Still Has Spirit Of A Child
Is it too soon to delete that other post? Because Mario Balotelli's Instagram is all you need to know about soccer....
So Normal It Hurts: The Triumph And Tragedy Of Phil Hartman
There were few thrills in preadolescent life as dependable as the voice of Troy McClure. That first resoundingly confident "Hi!" triggered a Pavlovian response like no other single syllable: Here, without a doubt, comes a belly laugh....
This Church Song-And-Dance Is The Most Excruciating Thing I've Ever Seen
Oh God. Ohhhhh God. I hurt all over. I hurt all over and I want to die....
I Can't Stop Looking At Mario Balotelli's New Haircut
Yoooooooooooooo....
Liverpool Defeat Middlesbrough 14-13 On Penalties
Yes, the headline is accurate. Liverpool defeated Championship side Middlesbrough 14-13 on penalties Tuesday to advance to the fourth round of the League Cup. Liverpool took leads of 1-0 and 2-1 but were pegged back twice, the second time in the 123rd minute of play after Kolo Touré's ill-advised ta...
This Three-Woman Cycling Wreck Is Absolutely Horrifying
So, this crash, from yesterday's Elite Women's Team Time Trial, is one nasty-ass crash....
Deadspin OBLITERATES Current Internet Headline Meme
As an internet user, you're probably aware of the symbiotic relationship between popular broadcasters like Jon Stewart and John Oliver and the internet. It works like this: broadcasters sum up a current issue in an entertaining, shareable video, and then websites looking for content that takes no ti...
Wall Street: Olive Garden Makes Bad Food Badly
A fight for control over Olive Garden's parent company, Darden Restaurants, has shed light on some of the Italianish restaurant chain's less-than-ideal kitchen practices. For example: Olive Garden kitchens do not salt their pasta water. For another example: Olive Garden kitchens exclusively prepar...
This Dumb Cup Has Room For Chips And Soda, But Not For Dignity
Perhaps you have seen a TV commercial for a product called "Snackeez," a grotesquely large plastic beverage cup with a special dry chamber for storing your favorite garbage snacks. If you have not, here it is:...
Mario Balotelli Gives Important Words Of Advice To School Children
The start of a soccer season, like the start of a school year, holds the promise of new adventures and fresh starts. Caught up in this spirit of growth and renewal, Mario Balotelli went to Instagram to drop some touching bits of wisdom on today's school children....
Arsenal Players Speak Out Against Homophobia, With Sexy Results
As a matter of policy, we don't usually participate in advertising campaigns. We're making an exception here, though, because a) the advertisement above, featuring several Arsenal players, is for an anti-homophobia campaign, which is fine by us and b) we need a pretext to run the following, which is...
Pam Oliver: Fox Sports' New Hires "Are All Young, Blond, And 'Hot'"
Pam Oliver will have one more season as a Fox Sports sideline reporter, although she'll no longer team up with Fox's "A" crew of Joe Buck and Troy Aikman. Oliver has written an account for Essence of how Fox broke the news to her, and on where sideline reporting is headed....
Mario Balotelli's Supposed New House Is Cool And Good
This may not be news to you, but Italian soccer star Mario Balotelli, who is the funnest, is back in England after being bought by Premier League side Liverpool from AC Milan. Since he'll ostensibly be sticking around for a little while, at least, he needs somewhere to live. This is the house he's r...
Large, Half-Naked Dodgers Fan Is Living The Motherfucking Dream
Hi, what are you up to? Actually, shut up, it doesn't matter what you are doing because you are not this Dodgers fan, who, aside from this good doggie, is the only one on Earth doing this whole "existence" thing correctly....
Eva Longoria Maybe Isn't The Best At Cooking Eggs
Here's actress, cookbook author, and ex-wife to the stars Eva Longoria on Jimmy Kimmel Live!, trying to cook up some damn eggs....
Restaurant Removes Bacon Sign, Ignites Culture War
This is it, folks. This just might be it. Your love of bacon will bring you to ruin, our ancestors said, but did we listen? Did we heed? No we did not. And now: Here we are, careening bacon-scented over the precipice of disaster. "My grandfather was alive in 2014," they will say, huddled fu...
Good Night, Don Pardo, 1918-2014
Don Pardo was an announcer at NBC for 60 years. He started in television so long ago it was on the radio, in 1944. The heaviest moment of his career was in 1963, when he was "booth announcer" on a shift at WNBC-TV in New York. Pardo did an off-camera "rip-and-read," from a big marked-up paper printo...
Is This The Best Depiction Of Power In American Cinema?
This scene, where Richard Nixon goes to Langley to meet CIA director Richard Helms, was cut out of the original release of Nixon, supposedly because Helms threatened to sue. It's really great....
British Skip Bayless Has A Strong Take On Mario Balotelli
We'll have more on this as an actual soccer move when (if?) it becomes official, but it's looking pretty near certain that AC Milan striker/international style icon Mario Balotelli will be returning to the Premier League, slotting in at Liverpool to replace Luis Suárez. Chris Bascombe over at the Te...
