mad Page 119 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Jim Calhoun Has A Knack For Agate Type
Jonah Keri writes the college basketball closer (more or less) daily. E-mail your questions, comments or Clarence Ceasar-related memories to [email protected]....

Favre Mad Libs > Brady Slash Fiction
Have you ever wanted to write a story about Brett Favre, but you just couldn't find the right words to express your raging hard-on for the guy? Well worry no more, because the Gray Lady's younger, sluttier e-counterpoint has written the perfect formula....

To Watch Tonight
What to watch on your new TV that is larger than the actual playing field being televised ... • College football: Pacific Life Holiday Bowl, Arizona State vs. Texas, at San Diego (8 p.m., ET) Let the Pac-10 Holiday Bowl humiliation continue. [ESPN] • College basketball: Nevada at North Carolina (7 p...

He's Baaaaaaaaaaack!
If it were up to me I would not be reposting this. I find 'Nightmare Ant' creepy, intimidating and more than a little demonic. But the truth is, I have very little control over this site anymore. Neither does Will. Yeah, it's 'Nightmare Ant' calling the shots now. And if 'Nightmare Ant' wants his ph...

The Armadillo Cowboy, Know Thy Name
The NBA Closer is written by our own Canadian weekend maestro J.E. Skeets. When he's not busy scouring the box scores or throwing out pork chops, he can be heard on The Basketball Jones daily podcast. Enjoy!...

Fun With Bermanisms
What is the worst Bermanism of all time? Sure, they're all cringe-inducing; especially if you imagine him blurting them out during pickup sex. Plus, they seem to multiply like fleas; there must be about a hundred of them. Well, actually, 528 to be exact. Yep, some poor sap compiled a list of every b...

Whatever Choice Was Made, It Was Going To Be Wrong
We enjoy this picture of Georgia center Fernando Velasco, taken after the Bulldogs' win over Georgia Tech Saturday, because he is holding an orange. Presumably, a fan through him — and some other Bulldogs — an orange to symbolize the Orange Bowl. This is odd not because Georgia is not going to the O...

Eat Ice, Evil Doers!
In Canada, it's never too early to teach the fundamentals of the national sport, even to eight-year-olds. Inside and outside edges, skating backward, forward crossovers, and if there's a scuffle on the ice you go over the boards and get in a few good shots, son!...


Watch Jerry Rice Crank It, Watch Jerry Rice Roll ...
Watch Jerry Rice crank dat Soulja Boy, then Super Man dat ho! I have to admit, I was impressed at how quickly Rice seemed to pick up the steps. Maybe that Dancing With the Stars bull-shit was worth it after all. And hey, is Patrick Ewing Jr. a certified Soulja Boy dance instructor or something? I su...

Breaking Down Pacquiao/Barrera II
Last night I decided that if I was going to spend $60 on this fight then I might as well offer you my thoughts on the action as it goes down. What follows is a round-by-round breakdown of the fight that should have gone down two years ago. Regardless, it was still an opportunity to see the best poun...

You Control Everything This Man Does
So here's a sad little story: The guy who serves as the model for motion capture on Madden, Kenny Bell, really wants to be a real life NFL player. He might look like a player, but he isn't, not really. But he wants to be....

The Fantasy Assassins
Considering most of you — unless you happened to draft using Yahoo's fantasy game last night — have already held your fantasy football drafts, you are, today, in the lone moment over the next three months when you won't be tinkering with your team. Right now, you are strong; your team is awesome! An...

Rodney Harrison Comes Clean, League Remains Dirty
The Patriots plan for a 19-0 season took a big hit today when it was announced that Rodney Harrison has been suspended for the first four games of the regular season. New England's veteran safety's name came up in a federal investigation that's going to rock Roger Goodell's world. When questioned by...

It's Officially Madden Day
In case you were wondering why no one in your office is, you know, around today, it's because Madden 08 was released last night. Because we are afraid to leave our apartment, we order from Amazon, so we won't see the games for a couple more days. But if you aren't waiting that long, it's a big deay...

Start Clearing Out Your Schedule For Madden
We are less than a week from the release of Madden 2008. In case anyone wants you for meetings or anything else that might waste your time next week....

Our One Moment Of Grace, Coming From A Guy Who Pees On Teammates
As Barry Bonds goes to finally break the record this weekend, we hark back to the only real revelatory moment of this "chase:" Greg Maddux's performance against Bonds on Friday night....

The Greatest Camp Of All Time, On Sale
It's not very often you can buy a legitimate piece of history via eBay. But the Muhammad Ali "auction" page that just went up there, whether you could be a serious buyer or not (and trust us, you can't), is worth reading just for the jaw-dropping import of it....

Ikea Loveseats Are Bulky And Difficult To Move
I was perusing Sports by Brooks late last night, as is my wont, and came across this item: "The NEW YORK TIMES reports EA Sports will provide new President Peter Moore with "relocation-related expenses" from Redmond, Washington, to Redwood City, California. The move will cost the company $330,000. M...